What is love?

[Hyde_is_my_anti-drug]

Exactly. :haihai:

Look at me, I'm in a committed relationship with another woman, you can't tell me the only reason I love her is to make babies because the possibility of us having genetic offspring is 0. Love is much more then basic instinct to procreate.

 

[El P8s]

Thats fair enough moff, but i guess it takes really having someone special to appriciate that love, at least for humans, is a bit more then basic instincts.
Its not scared of being alone that makes me fear a breakup, its being without HER that fills me with absolute horror, i dont miss the sex, if im that horney i could resort to self-service, its being with HER i miss.
I dont disagree alot of peoples relationships are guided by their instincts to mate, not wanting to be alone, but, how does one explain the old couple who couldnt emagine spending more then one night apart, or the stupid guys with funny alias like "nurizeko" spend so much time and money and effort, and getting on 12 hour flights, when he thinks planes are effectively asking to be smoten by an angry god, just to spend even a pathetic 2 weeks with her, and this type of relationship has lasted for over 3 years?, when if it was anyone else he woulda said "hey, this sh** just isnt cool, im bailing, seeya around", or the people who generally seem to act in ways that indicate its more then basic courting instincts driving their relationship decisions?
I dunno, maybe it is in the end just uninspired human instinct, but...when you love someone like i do or how any given person loves the woman they will be with the rest of their life, and it just works, its hard to emagine all this feeling is over a few hormones.

It's all just a question of your point of view....
If you look at it from the emotional point of view you might see it the way you see it or the exact opposite or something inbetween the possibilitys are endless...
But if you just dont want to go through this endless cycle of falling in love beeing hurt you love or hurting someone you love leaving them or beeing left by them falling into a deep dark hole and working your way back out ,you should just see is as something necessary like eating or whatever...
You dont get a kick out of it but on the other side you dont have the risk of beeing hurt...

 

[Esse]

i don't know what love is... Before I fell in love with 1 guy but... Now i don't believe another love come to me

 

[MajideSaiaku]

It's all just a question of your point of view....
If you look at it from the emotional point of view you might see it the way you see it or the exact opposite or something inbetween the possibilitys are endless...
But if you just dont want to go through this endless cycle of falling in love beeing hurt you love or hurting someone you love leaving them or beeing left by them falling into a deep dark hole and working your way back out ,you should just see is as something necessary like eating or whatever...
You dont get a kick out of it but on the other side you dont have the risk of beeing hurt...

Ah but what cycle?, i am quite happy to be single in any other circumstances, its being without my girlfriend i dont want to be, honestly, if she wasnt aronud and i hadnt fallen in love, i would be living single, and happy without marriage or kids or nothing.

Theres something more then hormones and instincts which drive me to the extremes dating a japanese woman entail.

I considor myself quite smart and i certainly dont considor myself amongst the thousands of millions who think they will die without love, as ive said, ive grown up depending on my self and i would be content to continue doing it, but i love my girlfriend and i really cant emagine going on without HER, and i know to some that still sounds like the knida folk who think they fall in love totaly with whoever it is their dating at the time, but its taken my woman 3 years to gain my respect and trust as fully as she has, and earn my lvoe which i dont give out easily at all, so despite my strong ability to survive without a partner and know what love really is, i feel i have found someone i really love.

It isnt science so i cannot really prove it other then my own word but, when you are really truely in love, you can so obviously tell the difference between love and thinking your in love.

My only proof is at the end of the day after all the usual constant pressures on a relationship, especially an international one, after 3+ years i am still with my girlfriend and she is still with me, and when we go to bed together i still feel content to lay there and listen to her breath and think i couldnt live without her.

Well i could but it would be a pretty lonely un-enriched existance.

 

[El P8s]

Ah but what cycle?, i am quite happy to be single in any other circumstances, its being without my girlfriend i dont want to be, honestly, if she wasnt aronud and i hadnt fallen in love, i would be living single, and happy without marriage or kids or nothing.
Theres something more then hormones and instincts which drive me to the extremes dating a japanese woman entail.
I considor myself quite smart and i certainly dont considor myself amongst the thousands of millions who think they will die without love, as ive said, ive grown up depending on my self and i would be content to continue doing it, but i love my girlfriend and i really cant emagine going on without HER, and i know to some that still sounds like the knida folk who think they fall in love totaly with whoever it is their dating at the time, but its taken my woman 3 years to gain my respect and trust as fully as she has, and earn my lvoe bwhich i dont give out easily at all, so despite my strong ability to survive without a partner and know what love really is, i feel i have found someone i really love.
It isnt science so i cannot really prove it other then my own word but, when you are really truely in love, you can so obviously tell the difference between love and thinking your in love.
My only proof is at the end of the day after all the usual constant pressures on a relationship, especially an international one, after 3+ years i am still with my girlfriend and she is still with me, and when we go to bed together i still feel content to lay there and listen to her breath and think i couldnt live without her.
Well i could but it would be a pretty lonely un-enriched existance.

Yes but as I said it's all a question of your point of view you might think/feel that way now but what if you brake up?
Looking back on it you would probaby see it differently.
Or I might see it differently in a few years time or earlier ... the point is that there is no right or wrong answer because feelings change along with your personality it could be just a tiny bit or it they might turn into the complete opposite so there.
Personally i choose to believe ,that is "love" is nice as long as it lasts but it isn't meant to last over a longer period of time....

 

[Kinsao]

It can, it can't...

Depends on the people involved, really.
I hope your love lasts, Nurizeko!

 

[El P8s]

It can, it can't...
Depends on the people involved, really.
I hope your love lasts, Nurizeko!

Yep but in 98% of the cases it wont....

 

[Rich303]

Yep but in 98% of the cases it wont....

Where (if anywhere) did you get these statistics from?

 

[El P8s]

Where (if anywhere) did you get these statistics from?

It's not a statistic it's just the way I believe it to be.But if you read carefully you'll find,that I said that everythig I say is just an opinion and not a fact because there are no facts ,which could explain love.

 

[Rich303]

Exactly. Just your (slightly depressing) opinion

There are no real 'facts' about religion either, but there are plenty of people who still believe in it, and are willing to destroy this planet over it.

My faith is love - you've got to believe in something!

 

[El P8s]

Exactly. Just your (slightly depressing) opinion
There are no real 'facts' about religion either, but there are plenty of people who still believe in it, and are willing to destroy this planet over it.
My faith is love - you've got to believe in something!

Or you just accept the fact that there is no porpouse in life and it's just there and good as well as evil dont exist so neither do right or wrong it's all just a question of your point of view.

 

[MajideSaiaku]

It can, it can't...
Depends on the people involved, really.
I hope your love lasts, Nurizeko!

Well, its lasted some pretty s****y bumps in the road, i reckon it will last the test of mortal time.

Also Moff, i think that statistic you through out there is erronous.

What makes better TV/listening/reading, the couples who live lnog happy lives together and die un-eventfully, or the couples who cheat, mess about break up and die on you?

Look at it this way, the vast majority of people in the developed world obey the laws of society.

Yet there is precious few media coverage of them and too much coverage of the criminals.

I do agree though that in the west, its harder to get into a secure relationship, but it doesnt mean that just because some folk arent having any luck that its most folk, most folk end up in happy relationships.

I respect your opinion, but, if you forgive me, i do feel a little sorry for you, because i get the impression its based off of previous experience, ive been pretty bitter about the opposite sex in my time aswell...

Love exists, if its an instinct, hormonal reactions, then its a very complex lot, and impressive in its complexity alone, or maybe love is some more deeper connection of the soul, who knows.

Im a man of science and reason, soim not the kinda bloke to subscribe to spiritual explanations for things, i dont feel love is spiritual but neither does it seem entirely biological.

 

[El P8s]

Jep you're right most of it is ,that's why it's just my opinion and you cannot necessarily apply it to anyone else.
I know ,that I havn't been around that long but the time I have been most of the thigs I remember about relationships ,if you can call it that at my age,were not really something you like to look back on.
But then again it might just be me who isn't capable of interacting with somebody in a relationship the way I should.
I just dont try to get into a relationship anymore.
But I would advice you not to listen to me I am an oughfully pessimistic person

 

[Haru-san`sTeiraa]

I wish you all would stop fighting,its really annoying....

 

[Haru-san`sTeiraa]

Ah but what cycle?, i am quite happy to be single in any other circumstances, its being without my girlfriend i dont want to be, honestly, if she wasnt aronud and i hadnt fallen in love, i would be living single, and happy without marriage or kids or nothing.
Theres something more then hormones and instincts which drive me to the extremes dating a japanese woman entail.
I considor myself quite smart and i certainly dont considor myself amongst the thousands of millions who think they will die without love, as ive said, ive grown up depending on my self and i would be content to continue doing it, but i love my girlfriend and i really cant emagine going on without HER, and i know to some that still sounds like the knida folk who think they fall in love totaly with whoever it is their dating at the time, but its taken my woman 3 years to gain my respect and trust as fully as she has, and earn my lvoe which i dont give out easily at all, so despite my strong ability to survive without a partner and know what love really is, i feel i have found someone i really love.
It isnt science so i cannot really prove it other then my own word but, when you are really truely in love, you can so obviously tell the difference between love and thinking your in love.
My only proof is at the end of the day after all the usual constant pressures on a relationship, especially an international one, after 3+ years i am still with my girlfriend and she is still with me, and when we go to bed together i still feel content to lay there and listen to her breath and think i couldnt live without her.
Well i could but it would be a pretty lonely un-enriched existance.

Nurizeko,I don`t know you,but I respect you.....but I don`t know why.....:?

 

[yidaki]

Everything is relative, even relativism.
My point of view can be different from yours, but it can also be the same.
Everyone lives their own lives.
Some people have a purpose, others don't.
Everyone makes a print for the future, but it doesn't matter for those that don't believe in it.
Isn't it just better to believe in something?
There's no fun in being a nihilist.

 

[drain_away]

i for one fully believe in love, but i don't see a point in explaining it.

it's like religion; you either believe in God, or you don't, but there are no scientific facts to prove one belief or the other. because of this i think it's pointless to describe or explain or prove love. it is - again, like religion - something only you can experience for yourself. you cannot take such a feeling to others and ask "is this love?" because each person has his or her own opinion. you know when you are in love, and you know when you aren't. just like you know when you believe in God and you know when you don't.

every person defines "love" differently, so i don't really think you can tell someone what it is. because it is intangible and inexplicable, you cannot prove it to somebody. so why bother trying?

 

[Tsuyoiko]

As many of you so rightly say, love is different for everyone. For me, true love meant I had to listen to my head as well as my heart - that sounds strange when talking about love. What I mean is, I thought I had been in love in the past, but it was all emotion, and I knew rationally that they were bad for me. Then I met someone who I reasoned would treat me right, although my knees didn't go weak at first as much as they had with the 'bad guys'. But I gave it a chance, and it developed into something much more fulfilling than the love that it really just lust.

 

[MajideSaiaku]

Tsu nailed it right on the head, people!.

TRUE love is basically still wanting to be with someone when the rose tint has faded and your heart isnt trying to escape its chest and your chest doesnt feel all tight and you think you'll float into the air at the sight of them.

True love is still wanting to be with someone quite strongly, even after your pulse has come down and your behaving normally again.

 

[Kinsao]

Ahh, true love....... when you will not only put up with your man when he has a cold, but actually look after him........:atchoo:

 

[Yokan]

Take it from someone who knows they have been in Love.

Love is something that can't be put into words. And there are many ways of going about it. I Know I loved by first girlfriend, which was....*thinks* from March 25th 2005 to Febuary 10th January 2006. Just about 9 months.
I'd loved her so much and all, but in the end she broke up with me because her 'feelings changed'. Of course I was upset, and I think you only realise after how much you love/loved a person. I'm still coming to terms with the break up(as in memories), but I guess it's also reference for the future. I am into my second relationship now with Natalie, and I can't say I LOVE her yet. Well, not in the terms as I did with my first gf after a space of time. But me and Natalie have only been going out 2 weeks...

As I said, love can't really be put into words. But, it's when you want to be with someone, and have emotions for them. You Feel for them, and any little thing they do makes you happy.
Maybe I could back up with what isn't love. Love Isn't your mind following Mr.Willie (for males ) and heh, whatever you want to say for a female! That can create problems. HUGE problems at my age. I've never had that problem, I know someone who has though. Love is following your heart, combined with your mind.

I know one love that's true tho:
MY LOVE FOR JREF AND JROCK!

Hope that shed light on the subject.

y0kan
:?

 

[El P8s]

I still believe the best way to act,when feelings get involved,is after Immanuel Kants "codex".