Do you judge others as potential friends on their political views?

[Tokis-Phoenix]

Just a curiosity thread, But do you judge others as potential friends on their political views? How much does someone's political views affect your friendship with them and how much do you care about stuff like that anyway?

I often find myself getting into serious debates on forums, both non-political and political related stuff- i mostly debate because i like to judge my own opinions to make sure my opinions are sound and good, and debating with other people helps this process etc.
But i do try not to judge others too much on where they stand on stuff like politics etc, because the way i see it its not that good to let stuff like that get too involved in your personal life like friendships etc. But then i notice others who strongly judge other people on where they stand on politics, like if they don't agree with them then they won't be their friend etc.

How important is your friends standing on politics and controversial issues etc to you? Is it important to agree with everything with another person for you to be able to befriend them, or do you try to keep such things separate and just enjoy the fun company of your friends and not judge them too much on serious stuff their idea's or opinions on politics etc?

 

[Mars Man]

Well, in basics here, no, I do not. Then again, we might have to determine what is meant (degree and depth of involvement with personality) by 'political.' A person's intrinsic personality make-up could very well lead to a particular political lean; thereby making that person's political view compatable and most fitting with another, or others.

It could be that such a personality is not one that fits with another. In other words, my basic personality might not fit well with a certain personality, and the difference between the two might well show up in political philosophy. That would not mean, then, that the 'not fitting' is NOT due to the results of the two separate personalities (political associaton and likings) but rather that the two personality states themselves do not agree--and thus mutually accepted association is hardly possible.

 

[Tokis-Phoenix]

Well, in basics here, no, I do not. Then again, we might have to determine what is meant (degree and depth of involvement with personality) by 'political.' A person's intrinsic personality make-up could very well lead to a particular political lean; thereby making that person's political view compatable and most fitting with another, or others.

Hm well what i meant by politics was basically peoples opinions on political issues like whether they are pro or anti Obama, pro or anti war in Iraq, pro or anti Gordon Brown etc.

I don't blame people for taking stuff like this seriously, but then again on the other hand i know quite a few people that would refuse to be friends with someone based on their certain political opinions and so don't befriend etc- is this right or wrong??

It could be that such a personality is not one that fits with another. In other words, my basic personality might not fit well with a certain personality, and the difference between the two might well show up in political philosophy. That would not mean, then, that the 'not fitting' is due to the results of the two separate personalities (political associaton and likings) but rather that the two personality states themselves do not agree--and thus mutually accepted association is hardly possible.

Hmm...Political philosophy is an interesting one. I think i could accept not accepting someone more if we weren't compatible with our philosophy/outlook on life. But i think sometimes people make themselves unnecessarily unaccessible to others because they are too judgmental on other peoples opinions on certain political matters- when in actual reality, if they put these things aside, then they could get along really well.
Two philosophically compatible people can end up with very different idea's/opinions on the same subject.

I have enjoyed the company of certain people when i knew we disagreed on important political matters (and i view politics are being something important to hold opinion about or understand to some extent etc), however i enjoyed the company of such people none the less because other than our opinions on certain matters, we got along very well.
But then i wonder whether this is right- if you are fundamentally against something politically important, how important a factor should it be when choosing to befriend someone who's against your important opinions on something political etc?

Someones when i'm musing over random stuff, i feel that people my own generation aren't aware/serious enough about important things like whats going on in world affairs in general. But other times i see people around my age and i see them loosing out on potentially great friends just because they take stuff like politics too seriously.

 

[Anohito]

It seems to me that your original post does not address the unpleasant reality that much so-called "political opinion" is deceitful propaganda, aggressively hostile to the legitimate interests of certain groups (particularly minorities), and similar things. If the policies that someone wants to put into place would cause me unwarranted harm, then I could not reasonably be expected to be friends with that person. It really is that simple.

 

[Ashikaga]

To me, it depends on the issue/s on which we disagree. If the issue is something that is really important to me, while I would certainly be civil to that person, I am afraid that it would make it very hard for me to set the differences in opinions aside and "hang out and have fun" together on a personal level.

 

[Kinsao]

I don't really think of things as 'political' issues. For example, to pick something at random, the war in Iraq, my views on that is more to do with my views on war in general, the moral issues connected with it, the practical issues of that situation, etc. etc... rather than something that I'd identify as specifically 'political'. For example, if someone said they were pro-Gordon Brown, or anti-Gordon Brown, I'd assume they had some reason for arriving at their view - for example, a particular policy they agree/disagree with, or something he has implemented that they like/dislike... so I am more likely to discuss with them about that, and dig away to find their views... for instance, what are your opinions about gun and knife crime? Do you think the government are doing the right things about it, or not? What would you like to see being done? To me these are not 'political' questions but social issues, and simply something that people have an opinion about in the same way as they have an opinion about what foods they prefer... and the same with such things as immigration or the education system... yes, these things are political in the sense that it is the government who bears the top-down responsibility for devising strategies to deal with them, but in the sense that they affect the ordinary people of England, they are simply 'issues' in life.

A person's views on issues that are important to me might of course affect how deeply we became friends, but in my opinion this is more of a 'social' thing than a 'political' thing.

Also, I can be friends with people who hold radically differing views than I do, but largely it is the way they express their views that makes them friends or not - if they can be tolerant, good-humoured, both of us prepared to laugh at ourselves and our differences are amusing and educational to us... it's very important to learn from others and also not to take oneself too seriously! If I feel that someone is a pleasant, well-meaning, good, honest person then I can overlook many of their views that differ from my own. The only time it would matter to me that our views be compatible would be in a partner - not a friend!

 

[Yan]

I do. Anyway, my friends are too young for having their own political views. Everyday, I'm talking with kids of 14 or 15 years old. They really don't care about politics and I can't really talk with them about that. But I'm talking with a lot of people on MSN and all this stuff and I can get angry if the person doesn't have the same political views than me. For exemple, if I'm talking with someone who doesn't have so different political views, I can juge him as a potential friend but if he has COMPLETELY different political views than me, it will be hard to be his friend.

 

[Anohito]

... For exemple, if I'm talking with someone who doesn't have so different political views, I can juge him as a potential friend but if he has COMPLETELY different political views than me, it will be hard to be his friend.

This is an important point. For example, if a non-Christian is acquainted with a Christian who is firmly convinced that non-Christians will go to Hell, can the Christian ever really be a friend of the non-Christian? I must insist that it would be impossible. A person who is convinced that you will suffer eternal punishment because of your religious beliefs, cannot be your friend in any meaningful sense of the word.

That brings up another point that is important to me. Many people seem to have a very loose definition of "friend" and speak of people who are actually casual acquaintances as "friends". I operate on a stricter concept of friendship. In everyday life everyone knows people who should be treated in a civil, non-confrontational manner. That does not mean that such people are necessarily your friends. Being a friend, even on a strictly Platonic, non-romantic basis, is something fairly serious to me.

 

[Yan]

For exemple, I really don't like to talk with people who are too religious because I'm atheist.

 

[Otenba]

I don't choose my friends or enemies by religion or political views, however, I do not want certain kinds of extremes. I mean, friends don't HAVE to discuss politics or do political activities, just like friends don't have to share alot of things they might not have in common. One of my friends hates all the Japan-craze and is scared of homosexuals while I'm a gay-rights advocate with a certain passion for Japan (who'd guessed), so what, I love him. We just don't bring Japan and gay stuff up when we're together, I mean, we can do lots of other things we both enjoy.

Extreme views however, are a different matter. For example if someone's "political view" is that my country, my beautiful homeland Israel, should disappear from the map, we are done. I do not tolerate people denying my land's and my family's right to exist. I am very strict in this matter and I also explicitely forbid people with such holocaust-advocating views to even speak to me. I was once offered lots of money by a fan of Arafat's, just to keep them company on a business trip, but I refused. You do not shake my hand after shaking Arafat's (as he'd proudly claimed he did), not for 2000 euros and a 4-day-trip to Milan, I'd rather go broke and never ever get to see Milan (Mayland?).

So as long as political or religious views don't get in the way of things and don't go as far as offending the other person, it's fine to be right-wing, left-wing, muslim, christian or whatever, just don't smother me in it. Another way to put it is: as long as your views don't injure the very core of my values, we can be friends.

 

[tada]

It's only people who are far too extreme on either end of the political spectrum that I could never see myself hanging out with. I'm talking about eco-terrorists on one end (near where I live, some eco-terrorists torched a $2 million house a few months ago), or religious fanatics (the ones that go door-to-door and try to convert you) on the other end for example. People who are too conservative or liberal just are total nut-jobs in my opinion, and could never see myself hanging out with them. I can't decide which extreme's weirdos are weirder.

That in and of itself has caused me to go from being slightly liberal to moderate.

 

[hideway]

I've friends from all political specters, and although we have light discussions about it sometimes, it is never discussed too seriously. I guess we all believe that everyone is entitled to his opinion and believes. Live and let live.

 

[Drew-san]

I have friends who have strong views completely different than mine, and similar. Its not a matter of your politcal opinion. Its commong interests and personality that leads me to friendship with someone. I also think having debates about somethings are a good thing. I have had ignorant views towords somethings, and after having debates with people I have changed some of my views.(not political)

I have friends who are fundementalist Christans and I myself am agnostic. I think people are intitled to their own views and I can be friends with whatever they believe. As long as I can get along with them and have a good time.