Do you have any regrets?

[thatsme]

Obviously I did and sometime I do.
If there was no aggravation to you or who ever, would you leave or change your partner?

Honestly speaking I would say no, why?
It does'nt matter who I decide to live with, the usual couple's complication will eventually arise.

I am sure that there are couples that have been able to live together for a long time, that does'nt mean have been happy throughout, still for whatever reasons they stuck together.

Whatever was the reason of a split up, wrong or right it is only your decision.
cheers

 

[yumeitsumo]

Man, I have lots of regrets. But I get over myself and move on.

 

[thatsme]

Man, I have lots of regrets. But I get over myself and move on.

You mean you internalize the regrets and move on?

 

[Goldiegirl]

I don't have any regrets. The choices I have made in my life have gotten me to where I am now. I have a great life.

Regret is the past holding you down in the present. I heard that first in the movie "Under the Tuscan Sun". I think that is absolutely true. We can learn from what we have done in our lives but to dwell on it will only keep you from going forward.

 

[Tokis-Phoenix]

I don't have any regrets. I know that my fiance is not the best looking guy in the world (IMO he's still very attractive though ), but i choose him knowing this- and the reason why i choose him is just because we "connect". I love him with all of my heart and i know he loves me back also 100%, we share the same sense of humor, we enjoy talking to each other, we trust each other 100%, we have great sex together, we enjoy each others company, everything is ideal etc.

I don't care if my man isn't the best looking guy in the world- to find someone who is amazingly good looking is not that difficult, however to find someone that you can really fall in love with and who returns the same love and feelings you have for them and that who you can really connect with etc is a lot rarer. Looks fade with age- we all grow old and wrinkly someday, but the one thing that never ages is love and that is the most important thing in a relationship. I am filled with happiness that i have found my soul mate, my lover, my partner- and he is my fiance :valentine: :haihai: .

 

[Goldiegirl]

Awwww! That is so sweet. Somehow it brought back the words that were spoken during my (our) wedding ceremony. "May you always see each other through lovers eyes."

 

[Tokis-Phoenix]

Awwww! That is so sweet. Somehow it brought back the words that were spoken during my (our) wedding ceremony. "May you always see each other through lovers eyes."

thanks! I think that "May you always see each other through lovers eyes" is such a nice thing too, those words are filled with such deep meaning and positive feeling .


I think we live in such a materialistic society now days, so much emphasis is placed on appearance/looks and wealth and social status/standing etc- no wonder why people have so many issues in their relationships now days, everyone wants more than what they have and can't love or accept what they are stuck with etc...I think we should try concentrating more as a society instead on the more meaningful things in life, like love, friendship, family, tolerance and compassion- these things are what matter the most and are of far greater substance and worth than just physical appearance or material possessions etc .

 

[Chi65]

Well, depends, because if there are unsurmountable mountains, and any going on will get both sides even deper into the mud, you simply have to split. In which case, there are no regrets, even if afterwards the situation changes again, but because of the clear split.
I mean, if someone has a serious problem, that clearly needs a professional doctor, like completely giving up any own efforts for earning something to contribute to the union and starts behaving like a child, you cannot possibly expect the other side, if it has nothing either, to keep on going. Particularly if there is a child to be cared for.
In such a case it would be complete suicide for all, to keep this up.
I know many relations of this kind, that also went broke.
It is in fact a psychological error, but should be handled professionally(that one had a kindergardner as friend later on, as I hoped for as one help. . .), but I could possibly only keep one child up, and the choice of which child then, is more than clear, for every woman in such a case, actually. You have to be very strong then, but it works. Life goes on. Don't look back.
I also know upside down stories, when a man makes this choice and keeps the child, which is as good then. Any above lack of responsibility can definitely kill the union.
Then the new life has priority, however hard it may be, for all sides.
No regrets thus. Never.
Some say, you shold have known before, no, you can't, some unexpectedly change into this without forwarnings, plus deny any insight nor change and simply eat you up. And then thats it.
It can make you very eagleeyed towards similar situations and thus was a big lesson after all!

 

[Annubis]

I have no real regrets.
I do love someone and miss them dearly. I regret that he will not speak to me. There is nothing I can do about that, though... time will tell.

 

[Chi65]

I have no real regrets.
I do love someone and miss them dearly. I regret that he will not speak to me. There is nothing I can do about that, though... time will tell.

It will, but keep in direction, grow towards it, and then you will find out!

Much luck!!

 

[thatsme]

Nice to hear the positive side.
I think that regrets are natural feeling.
it start with love I am sure that there is a scientific term to that, then gradually you get used to your partner, and eventually you get tired, I forgot the respect thingy.
the above is just a way to look at it.

 

[Kinsao]

Congratulations Tokis Phoenix! Except you can't have the best guy in the world coz I have, nyah nyah but let's not argue over it, hey?! ;-)

I haven't got any regrets... Even when I made some choice that had some bad consequences, it's still got me here where I am today, so I can't say it was totally negative... I am happy now so I can't say I would wish to change anything, even things that were painful at the time.

 

[Anohito]

Non ! Rien de rien
Non ! Je ne regrette rien

 

[Tokis-Phoenix]

Congratulations Tokis Phoenix! Except you can't have the best guy in the world coz I have, nyah nyah but let's not argue over it, hey?! ;-)
I haven't got any regrets... Even when I made some choice that had some bad consequences, it's still got me here where I am today, so I can't say it was totally negative... I am happy now so I can't say I would wish to change anything, even things that were painful at the time.

Lol, i agree though too, i've been through some really harsh stuff in my life, many a time i thought about giving up or running away, but i stuck at what i had in life and continued to hope, and because of that i ended up meeting my fiance .
When i first met my man, it was such a chance meeting, we were both in a situation and place that was very rare for us to be in and if i had made any tiny change to my day that day i would probably have not met my fiance- the same is true for him. So i really think that we were meant to be, we only had a very slim opportunity of time to meet each other, and we did, so i am happy that my life did turn out the way it did (even the bad parts in it), because if i had led even a slightly different life as to the one i have lived i probably wouldn't have ever met my man, and he is the best thing that has ever happened to me in my life so he makes all the hardships in life i have endured certainly worth it .

 

[Kinsao]

^ Absolutely seconded!

Our meeting was very random, too... just goes to show...

 

[nice gaijin]

There are things that I regret, but I dwell on nothing.

 

[jctutu23]

i have regrets, what i have done in the past have come back and hunt me.

 

[Chi65]

Now, thats funny somehow, because for me it was also like those coming back, who were regretting themselves, rather than me to close the doors after having been treated badly. Only those ones thought, they might be able to open it maybe this time, which did not work, because I had no regrets, going on, hehe. Won't get fooled again etc.
It always turned out to be right for the next step, so, still, no regrets at all.

If one door closes, another one opens up, you just have to trust this. But what is really good, stays or can very well open up again if the right key is found. I thus have many wonderfull friends.

It did not always work all the way, because my biggest love died in person and too early, but somehow, he is always around and helps me out. He is just there, best way he can, so to say. A bit sad at times, but still no regret about everything from my side. (Thats not the one from above, BTW, although also from there seems to be a constant oh sorry and lemmi help from him. From certain distance, but yes)

Live is something very wonderfull. . .

 

[undone]

all is relative because it's karma

 

[Tokis-Phoenix]

IMHO, its not good to live a life full of regrets; you should move on with your life, accept that you can't change the past, and be happy with the present- regrets are not that much different from guilt. People feel guilty when they know they have done something wrong- guilt exists for a good reason, the purpose of guilt though is to address why you feel guilty though and either correct what wrongs have been done if you can, or accept that what done is done and move on.
You cannot let regret rule your life just as much as there needs to be a point where you need to stop dwelling on past issues. If there are things that make you feel happy in the present, then dwell on these and appreciate them and ensure you continue to have good things in your life, rather than dwell on the things which you cannot change in the past; if you dwell too much on the past, good things in the present may pass you by without you really acknowledging, appreciating or even noticing them. The main thing is what you do in the present, because this will affect what your future is like.
Time is a great healer- but healing needs to come from your part too. Be compassionate and tolerant to others, show kindness whenever possible, spend quality time with your friends and family, work well, make time for yourself in your life but also those that matter to you, spend wisely, eat and live healthily and try and help those in need when you can, try and see things from other people's perspectives, accept that you cannot change everyone else but also accept that you can change yourself if you put your mind to it etc- if you do these things, you will find your life will be filled with less and less regrets.

Relationships...Are important. People concentrate a lot on their relationship with their lover (or concentrate on finding a lover and having a relationship with them), but this isn't the only type of relationship that you should prioritize- all relationships are important, whether they are with friends, family, colleagues etc. Treat everyone fairly and with consideration etc- none of us are perfect.

Youth is the shortest part of life, so enjoy it and try to do things meaningful with your youth, create good memories and meaningful happy relationships with other people, give yourself credit and be happy with yourself . Deal with problems, not dwell on them. Don't let your past decide your future- you need to take your own life in your own hands and decide what you want to do with it and what you want out of it, you are your own ruler, not others and not your past .

 

[Chi65]

Relationships...Are important. People concentrate a lot on their relationship with their lover (or concentrate on finding a lover and having a relationship with them), but this isn't the only type of relationship that you should prioritize- all relationships are important, whether they are with friends, family, colleagues etc. Treat everyone fairly and with consideration etc- none of us are perfect.
. . . .You need to take your own life in your own hands and decide what you want to do with it and what you want out of it, you are your own ruler, not others and not your past .

These parts I second very much, very well said! Thanks!

 

[Oren]

These parts I second very much, very well said! Thanks!

*O* said,

Do good things for yourself, and good things will be attracted to your wake. The good person will be so busy doing healthy goodness that before he/ she knows what has happened to him/ her, they're in the middle of Love; which is a spirit and should not be played around with; it just happens . Please be careful, about words used loosely, and what you ask for, when it comes to Love; you just may get it--not that it's a bad thing (it's a spirit that can change mankind)--but as an individual, just be ready when it talks back to you. Love can be easily perceived as monolithic when weighed against the human perception of her heart.

*O* said

 

[Chi65]

;-) how comes, that you have this famous female name, dear O-racle Oren??

Any past life memories coming up with this?