RockLee said:
Hmm, sounds like a good time to break up man. I'm sorry, but that's how I think about it. If she's having doubts, and talks about another guy..that's BAD! If she falls for another dude that easy she's obviously not worth your time. Meh women
I agree, if my woman was talking like that I'de have already packed my bags and left her there to do whatever she wants.
No point wasting feelings time and effort on a woman who openly talks about other men and the possibility of infidelity with them.
sorry, had to ask... In all honesty, in response to her talking about "this guy she has been talking to and was thinking of meeting up because she said he tells her he would be everything im not etc," it sounds like she doesn't actually know this guy, and he's just trying to sweet talk her from afar, like over the internet.
Tell her that if she really believes that kind of bullshit enough to throw enough a year-long relationship, she should run to the other guy and enjoy the week of attention he showers on her before he gets tired of her and moves on to the next girl he meets in a chat room. She should know how you feel about her without having to remind her every five minutes, but if she needs that kind of reinforcement, you should be able to accomdodate her.
If you think it's worth salvaging this relationship, it's not too late. To me, she sounds weak willed and gullible, but lonely. If you paid for the vacation and she insists on running to this other guy (assuming he's in Hawaii), ask her for her half of the expenses, since she's just using this as an excuse to visit some sweek-talking internet predator.
This is also good advice.
I think most advice here is good, you really gotta considor the future of this relationship, when a woman talks openly about another man its downright rude disrespectful, and just not acceptable.
Doing that in a relationship is like saying how much she likes your family while pouring petrol on their home, its downright two faced and insincere, you cannot allow yourself to just believe she really wants to be with you while she mentions other men.
At the least any considoration of proposal should be scrapped for the near future.
Love is a very important thing, and it has rgeat potential to cause harm to people if it is damaged, so, you should try and be very careful with it, think of dating as interviewing women for the job of looking after and guarding the small baby jesus or something important like that, like the world doomsday switch, if you cant emagine her doing a good job of resisting doing harm to the world by sheer temptation alone to press the button, then you probably dont wanna entrust her with your heart.
Women can make mistakes, say things they didnt mean to, let you down, but actual beytrayal of a relationship is something i dont
personally stand for at all, zero tolerance.
I see fidelity as the greatest sign of commitment and love, if you really love someone it will never be an issue, but if a woman must always wrestle with her desire to take a dip into the ocean so to say, then she doesnt really love you.
well simply put I love her.
we faught for about 5-6 hours over him then i said if you cant make up your mind right now im taking her to the train station and its over. well needless to say 1/4 tank of gas wasted and 3 hours later at station. to sum it up it was the little things that she misses such as holding hands, opening door, texting her, and i dont use the I love you enough. she said the other guy made her feel like when we first meet and she missed that. It came down to if she choose me she had to call him and tell him that she loves me and to stop misleading him. I wasnt mad at the other guy. he is only human. I think what hurt me the most is if she loved me she wouldnt want anyone else but me and it wouldnt matter if the other guy liked her. She called and I talked to him and after she called her mom to let her know what was happening and i tryed to talk to her (speaks only japanese) Right now we are still together but i sometimes wonder why we still are. it seems the only thing we have in common anymore is the golden toy. Music, Movies and such but that nothing to base a real realtionship off of. I guess time will tell.
You should tell her that part of lvoe and relationships is losing the "honeymoon period" feeling, every couple
EVERY COUPLE has to eventually face the reality of a relationship once the novelty wears off.
You have to ask her if she is really interested in you for more then simply mere novelty.
Also you have to ask
yourself why you dont personally still hold hands sometimes or say i love you.
In a relationship with love, even after many years, it might have dried up a bit, but theres still the odd drizzle of affection, still possible to hold hands.
You have to ask her but yourself as well if your both really wanting the married future prospect, or if this was merely a play-relationship.
Your young kinda like me so, I know how it is to be trying to get through the minefield of earning experience as un-scathed as possible but sometimes it requires hurt and break-up and painful closure to earn that right of knowledge and experience.
Either way we can only offer small titbits of advice, its up to you to really dig deep and decide what you want.
Can you settles for a broken or rocky relationship that requires a mountain of effort just to maintain a routine semblence of love, or do you want a relationship where all the effort and hard times are more situational, financial.
most relationships require a bit of both, its when they go to either extreme you have to reconsidor maintaining it.
Anyway I've ranted enough.
