Cancer, death, and a broken family

[thefinalpokèdude]

I just found out that my brother who died in 2004 had leukemia. And that I was born in co-fetal twin death. In-utero death in a twin pregnancy after the third trimester is very serious, and side effects can be very affecting. For example, I have just recently had a brainstroke. I am 35 years of age by the way.

They do not say so directly, but they have been insinuating that my parents are at fault for some various things and at various degrees. What i found out however is that both are as dumb as bread, and that neither are at fault for anything other than getting duped by the way going forward.

I feel like I have been imprisoned for my entire life. I mean that means all parenting and learning have either been lacking, not there at all, or straight out misleading. So i have had some obstacles getting mentally to where i am today.

The problem is I cannot get out of this mess. The moment I became awake things started to go all crazy. For instance i got a brainstroke and people are harassing me anywhere i try to get ahead.

They are saying that they are trying to find out who is at fault. But i feel like they are making light of the situation and basically putting the blame on my mother for childbearing a japanese male.

I want to stay anonymous for now for obvious reasons. But i am really wondering what to do. I am not physically disabled in movement but because of the way i was born my stamina is equal to zero. So i am a disabled person in this regard.

Please get in touch if you have any advice.

 

[okinawaholic]

I really don't have any advice for you except to see an English-speaking therapist and go from there. I don't even know how Japan treats "disabled" people besides the medical area of pricing care in for affordability.

For example, I have just recently had a brainstroke.

This made me interested in knowing whether or not you had the C19 vaccine though. I have conditions that make me prone to clotting, which is why I have to donate blood every few months, and also why I won't get the vaccine.

Don't want to bring up any conspiracy theories or make this discussion about this or that, or place blame on it. I just want to know for my own knowledge bank.

 

[mdchachi]

They do not say so directly

and people are harassing me

They are saying that they are trying to find out who is at fault.

Who is the "they" and "people" you're referring to? Family? Your parents?
Are you independent or are you living with your parents still?

Finding who is at "fault" seems like a pointless exercise.
The main advice I have is to extricate yourself away from the people that are holding you back, harassing you, or otherwise stifling your growth if at all possible. But if you're dependent on them, that would be very difficult I'm afraid.

 

[Majestic]

Finding who is at "fault" seems like a pointless exercise.

I couldn't agree more with this.
Unless you are looking for some specific legal compensation, finding out who to blame does absolutely nothing to improve your situation. If you are permanently disabled, the most important thing (in my view) is to find out how to overcome your limitations so that you can live a fulfilled, productive, satisfying life. Therapy, medication, meditation, all of these are potential paths to you living a good life. Maybe there is a government agency who can help you get access to a doctor who can help you. You do not need to carry your animosity towards you parents or your guardians forever.