Attending a Japanese wedding

[Grandpa Frank]

Raise your hands !!!

Everyone who wants to see the video of Dutch's wedding on YouTube say YEAAAAAA!!!!! But I'll settle for regular photos too.

Uncle Frank

 

[KirinMan]

Everyone who wants to see the video of Dutch's wedding on YouTube say YEAAAAAA!!!!! But I'll settle for regular photos too.
Uncle Frank

Here here......!!!

 

[ArmandV]

Money is the best thing, 20.000 for friends and for closer persons such as family or best friends would be 30.000.

I am having my own wedding in the weekend, which is a Dutch-Japanese wedding. I am to busy to post on here to be honest haha.

Alright, I'll bite. What's the Dutch portion of the wedding entail?

 

[Mikawa Ossan]

Alright, I'll bite. What's the Dutch portion of the wedding entail?

Splitting the bill at the end of the reception perhaps?

 

[Glenn]

Maybe they ought to have money dances at the reception (or do they?).

They do money dances in California?

 

[ArmandV]

They do money dances in California?

Oh, yes! My cousin's husband was ticked-off last summer at his daughter's wedding because the D.J. didn't start the money dance until after about a third of the guests had already left.

 

[Mikawa Ossan]

This is really off topic, but....what in god's name is a money dance?

 

[ArmandV]

Not really off-topic since it is wedding-related.

This is really off topic, but....what in god's name is a money dance?

You really need to get out more. ;-)

A money dance is at the wedding reception in which the bride and groom are available for dancing with their guests. At the start of the dance, the guest will hand the bride or groom some cash and start dancing with them. The money dance is generally announced by the D.J. (or band leader) and men will line up to dance with the bride and women will line up to dance with the groom (with wads of cash in their hands).

 

[Mikawa Ossan]

Oh....yeah, now that you mention it, I think when my brother got married last year they did that a little. Must be an American thing.

 

[Glenn]

Not completely. When my friend got married in Pittsburgh in 2005 they didn't do it. He's of Polish descent, so they had some thing with shots. I don't really remember too much of it.

Anyway, I had been told that it was a Louisiana thing, but now I'm wondering if it's a French/Italian thing or something like that. I wonder where else people do it, and what ethnic background they have.

 

[ArmandV]

Not completely. When my friend got married in Pittsburgh in 2005 they didn't do it. He's of Polish descent, so they had some thing with shots. I don't really remember too much of it.
Anyway, I had been told that it was a Louisiana thing, but now I'm wondering if it's a French/Italian thing or something like that. I wonder where else people do it, and what ethnic background they have.

I used to do wedding videotaping in Southern California and pretty near every wedding I've attended (including family ones) had a money dance. I don't think there's any ethnic boundaries. Jewish, Italian, black, Polish, etc. all seemed to do it.

I think the purpose is to give the bride and groom some extra honeymoon cash or to help pay for the wedding and reception.

 

[Mikawa Ossan]

Right, but that's in America, right? I've never been to a wedding in Japan with a dance period, let alone a money one! That's why I say it must be an American thing.

 

[ArmandV]

Right, but that's in America, right? I've never been to a wedding in Japan with a dance period, let alone a money one! That's why I say it must be an American thing.

Could be. Sooner or later, like other things, Japan will eventually pick up on it.

 

[Mikawa Ossan]

Maybe. But I doubt it given how those wedding chapel/reception companies are. If I remember correctly, you have 2 hours, and then you're out.

 

[misa.j]

Yeah, maybe since dance is getting more popular in Japan among older generation, they will start it instead of Karaoke which can be pretty awkward to sit through sometimes.

 

[Glenn]

Karaoke at weddings?! That seems like a really bad idea to me. But then again, I've warmed up to karaoke over the past few months....

 

[leonmarino]

That whole "money dance" thing doesn't seem so attractive to me. And it probably wouldn't work at Dutch weddings!!

What's wrong with Karaoke's? I wish they had more of those in Holland!!

Ah well, a few more hours and it's showtime.. I hope it's going to be a very beautiful wedding.

 

[Glenn]

Lots of drunk people singing way too loud and horribly out of tune, and never with either each other or the music -- that's what's wrong with it.

For the money dance I usually go with $1-$5. I'm not that rich.

 

[misa.j]

Exactly, let's just say it's almost like watching "American Idol", not that I've ever seen it but sounds like it, except that people at the wedding receptions are older, more drunk and have a really uninterested audience.

I've worked at wedding ceremonies as 'smoke & bubble maker' which come out when the couple cut a fake plastic wedding cake, one time the machine was broken and all that came out were a few bubbles at the climax of the event when people came forward to take pictures.

I wonder if they still use smoke and bubbles...

 

[justinod]

I am legally married, but we have yet to have our wedding. I understand that it is customary for people to bring money to the wedding, but I do not like the idea that it is obligatory. I don't want my friends and family to feel obliged to bring money to my wedding. Is it ok to put on the invitation something to the effect of: please do not feel obliged to bring money.' ?

 

[KirinMan]

I am legally married, but we have yet to have our wedding. I understand that it is customary for people to bring money to the wedding, but I do not like the idea that it is obligatory. I don't want my friends and family to feel obliged to bring money to my wedding. Is it ok to put on the invitation something to the effect of: please do not feel obliged to bring money.' ?

There will always be people that will feel "obliged" to give you some sort of gift. A lot may depend on the type of wedding that you are planning. If it is at some hotel like many Japanese couples have don't be surprised if people give you money as a gift.

I have been to weddings here where the couple held their wedding at a Catholic church and then held a pot-luck gathering afterwards in lieu of a big reception. They requested guests to bring their favorite "ethnic" dish. It was quite a feast, people brought all sorts of food and we had a great time. The newlyweds supplied the drinks and all the food was brought by the guests, one of the parents coordinated with the guests so that everyone didn't bring the same thing. Evidently it took a bit of work but it turned out great.