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Weird funny English

Hey, this really made me laugh out loud (something that doesn't happen all that often. ;))

The best quotes are those who make sense if taken literally, but really mean something else in practice.

There is a word for phrases like that... and english has lots of them. Does anyone know which word it is?

There really should be a dictionary with such phrases. The only way to pick them up for a non-native speaker is through movies. I still come across new such phrases (even after having seen hundreds of english movies).
 
I've stumbled onto that one before. I almost cried I was laughing so much the first time. My roomates thought it was hilarious too.
 
My favorites:

Car rental brochure, Tokyo:
WHEN PASSENGER OF FOOT HEAVE IN SIGHT, TOOTLE THE HORN. TRUMPET HIM MELODIOUSLY AT FIRST, BUT IF HE STILL OBSTACLES YOUR PASSAGE THEN TOOTLE HIM WITH VIGOUR.

Tokyo hotel's rules and regulations:
GUESTS ARE REQUESTED NOT TO SMOKE OR DO OTHER DISGUSTING BEHAVIOURS IN BED.

In a Bangkok temple:
IT IS FORBIDDEN TO ENTER A WOMAN EVEN A FOREIGNER IF DRESSED AS A MAN.

:D :D 😄 👏
 
I've seen some of these in other places. They definitely are pretty funny.

hmmm, why is that the Japanese ones are always just completely whacked? :(
 
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