Mycernius
The Hairy Wookie
- 4 Feb 2005
- 4,644
- 203
Something someone sent to me:
Be very pround to be British because:
Only in Britain...can you get a pizza to your house faster than an ambulance
Only in Britain...do supermarkets make sick people walk all the way to the back of the shop to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigerettes at the front
Only in Britain...do people order double chesseburgers, large fries, and a DIET coke
Only in Britain...do banks leave both doors open and chain pens to the counter
Only in Britain...do we leave cars worth thousand of pounds on the drive and lock our junk and cheap lawn mower in the garage
Only in Britain...do we use answering to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place
Only in Britain.. do we have disabled parking places in front of a skating rink
NOT TO MENTION...
3 Brits die each year testing if a 9v battery works on their tongue
142 Brits were injured in 1999 by not removing pins from new shirts
58 Brits are injured each year by using sharp knives instead of screwdrivers
31 Brits have died since 1996 by watering their Christmas trees while the fairy lights were plugged in
19 Brits have died in the last 3 years by believing that Christmas decorations were chocolate
British hospitals reported 4 broken arms last year after cracker pulling accidents
101 people since 1999 have had broken parts of plastic toys pulled out of the soles of their feet
18 Brits had serious burns in 2000 trying on a new jumper with a lit cigerette in their mouth
A massive 543 Brits were admitted to A&E in the last two years after opening bottles of beer with their teeth
8 Brits were injured last year in accidents involving out of control Scalextric cars
And finally
In 2000 eight Brits cracked their skull whilst throwing up into the toilet
RULE BRITANNIA
Be very pround to be British because:
Only in Britain...can you get a pizza to your house faster than an ambulance
Only in Britain...do supermarkets make sick people walk all the way to the back of the shop to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigerettes at the front
Only in Britain...do people order double chesseburgers, large fries, and a DIET coke
Only in Britain...do banks leave both doors open and chain pens to the counter
Only in Britain...do we leave cars worth thousand of pounds on the drive and lock our junk and cheap lawn mower in the garage
Only in Britain...do we use answering to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place
Only in Britain.. do we have disabled parking places in front of a skating rink
NOT TO MENTION...
3 Brits die each year testing if a 9v battery works on their tongue
142 Brits were injured in 1999 by not removing pins from new shirts
58 Brits are injured each year by using sharp knives instead of screwdrivers
31 Brits have died since 1996 by watering their Christmas trees while the fairy lights were plugged in
19 Brits have died in the last 3 years by believing that Christmas decorations were chocolate
British hospitals reported 4 broken arms last year after cracker pulling accidents
101 people since 1999 have had broken parts of plastic toys pulled out of the soles of their feet
18 Brits had serious burns in 2000 trying on a new jumper with a lit cigerette in their mouth
A massive 543 Brits were admitted to A&E in the last two years after opening bottles of beer with their teeth
8 Brits were injured last year in accidents involving out of control Scalextric cars
And finally
In 2000 eight Brits cracked their skull whilst throwing up into the toilet
RULE BRITANNIA
