someone please help... i'm a 22 yr old korean-american dating a 33 yr old japanese man (from japan).
For the second time last night he made me cry. Why? because I can't understand him sometimes. I can't tell if it's his lack of English-speaking skill, but he keeps insisting that if I'm going to cheat on him, he won't care-- he'll just get over me quick and date someone else.
I have no problem with the logic or reasoning behind it, I have a major problem with the fact that he states it over and over and over and over. Every night, for the past 2-3 weeks. It's been the same conversation.
basically, he asks if i can wait for him while he goes to spain for 3 mo's. I tell him of course, i love only him. i don't need anyone else, i need him.
then he always proceeds to say, "if you go somewhere else (i.e., find another lover) then I don't care. You find some japanese or american guy; i find some japanese girl. easier for me. easier for you".
is he being indirect in wanting to get rid of me?
and yet, when i get upset and stop talking to him, he starts hugging and kissing and trying to talk again. he gets confused about the change in mood. what does he want/ not want?
i always turn the question on him, "can you wait for me? do you want to find someone else?" to which, he always makes an emphatic "no! i can wait".
i have to admit, he brings up this conversation when he gets at least midly drunk (2 pints of beer after work, which is just about every night).
can someone out there, with some insight on japanese men or men in general, please explain what is going through his mind? and how can i get him to stop asking?
For the second time last night he made me cry. Why? because I can't understand him sometimes. I can't tell if it's his lack of English-speaking skill, but he keeps insisting that if I'm going to cheat on him, he won't care-- he'll just get over me quick and date someone else.
I have no problem with the logic or reasoning behind it, I have a major problem with the fact that he states it over and over and over and over. Every night, for the past 2-3 weeks. It's been the same conversation.
basically, he asks if i can wait for him while he goes to spain for 3 mo's. I tell him of course, i love only him. i don't need anyone else, i need him.
then he always proceeds to say, "if you go somewhere else (i.e., find another lover) then I don't care. You find some japanese or american guy; i find some japanese girl. easier for me. easier for you".
is he being indirect in wanting to get rid of me?
and yet, when i get upset and stop talking to him, he starts hugging and kissing and trying to talk again. he gets confused about the change in mood. what does he want/ not want?
i always turn the question on him, "can you wait for me? do you want to find someone else?" to which, he always makes an emphatic "no! i can wait".
i have to admit, he brings up this conversation when he gets at least midly drunk (2 pints of beer after work, which is just about every night).
can someone out there, with some insight on japanese men or men in general, please explain what is going through his mind? and how can i get him to stop asking?