I did not say it was wrong wrong wrong. It said it was a gross overstatement.
OK, so you basically you say it is wrong
most of the time. Perhaps in your world. Not mine, and nobody else here is defending your view either. Which raises the question of what the rest of us are seeing that you are not.
And you can talk to strangers who will actually smile and talk to you back half the time. And people did not hesitate to talk to me. Perfect strangers.
Again, in Japan I get a lot of strangers talking to me and being friendly. For many, they are just curious of where I'm from and what I think of Japan. For others on a long trip, making small talk just to pass the time. And some ask about my family in Japan. Holding open the door? Not a typical custom in Japan - I don't expect it, so if someone doesn't do it, I don't get bent out of shape. At any rate, yes there are some Pleasantvilles that still exist back home. But a lot of other places in many different countries where people keep to themselves - nothing wrong with it. The real question is if you were definitely a foreigner - would those people back home be so open? Or if you were African-American? I doubt it.
In general, I agree you can call most Japanese shy and reserved. But that doesn't mean they aren't generally friendly, nice or helpful. Most of the time they are. Not to you? Well they are to everyone else typing here. And I've heard much the same for almost 35 years. Far, far more than those in Europe, China, and Korea. Most Japanese I've spoken to think Americans are quite friendly. A Kofu friend of mine went to study in Iowa for 4 years, and she was stared at a lot of the time too. But the language barrier can be a problem. You have not elaborated on your language skills. The more you know, the more connection you can make. And on a train you've never seen someone give up their seat for a pregnant lady or elderly woman? I'd find it hard to get through a day and
not see that. Makes me wonder what Japan you are in - it certainly isn't the one the rest of us have been in.
I repeat GENERALLY VERY welcoming and friendly. If that does not describe people in paradise, what the hell does?
You're joking, right? Generally very welcoming and friendly doesn't describe paradise. It describes a nice place to visit. Paradise is someplace I hope to be someday, with my Creator, departed parents, lost friends and other loved ones. I'm sorry if that is too spiritual a viewpoint for you.
its others reading my comments looking for negatives.
No, you are throwing out enough negatives yourself, a copious amount. The difference is that we can see the positives in Japan, apparently you cannot or will not recognize them. Do you have any meaningful friendships with any Japanese? If so, what is their reply when you tell them Japanese are only really friendly to squeeze a freebie out of you? Or if you just go just a little deeper you find ice water in their hearts?
The fact is that many long term ex-pats have a love-hate relationship with Japan - nothing wrong with that. I could go on and on about every problem and negative thing I've experienced in Japan - and I've been quite vocal about some in the past, enough for some others to take me to task over it. But that doesn't make what I observed or went through untrue or invalid. The real difference is that everyone but you can see a lot of positives about Japan as well - more than outweighing the negatives. In fact I haven't seen
anyone else on this forum with such strident views than yours. Why are the rest of us experiencing so many positive things in Japan and not you? Same country, same people. By the way we are all not in Okinawa either. And none of us are manga kiddies, Japan groupies, or Pollyannas who've never has a bad experience. It boils down to one thing - your attitude.
Look, MoZ, I don't want you to turn out to be some burned out wreck - and I've encountered a few of them--from that uptight college kid who was a goner before he even stepped off the plane, to a 20+ year expat curmudgeon who could only say he liked the safety and sushi, and couldn't think of anything else. You should have a good life, enjoying the fruits of your labors. But ultimately that is all up to you. So unless there's a more positive other side of you that you've kept well hidden, you'd better open up to see a much larger and positive side to Japan. Otherwise, you won't be going in the right direction. And that really would be a shame.