Language is such a simple affair, KirinMan. That cannot be denied. And with that simplicity, it is often so easy to slight someone or something.
I disagree strongly with you your premise about language being "a simple affair". There are too many examples throughout history where "simple language" could have saved or avoided disasters that affected the entire world.
If language was so simple there would be no slights, there would be no misunderstandings, there would be no pain inflicted upon others due to one's lack of ability to use said language.
Language is only simple in the hands of one who knows what or how to use it effectively.
All in all though, it can come off as nothing or everything.
Which is determined purely by how one takes what is being said. When talking about issues regarding homosexuals and homosexuality people have become hyper sensitive.
You work overtime attempting to be PC and unwittingly come across as having reservations, questions, curiosity, fear, and maybe some ignorance as well. Homosexuality is different to every individual and the greatest problem for heterosexuals as I see it, is fear that association or acceptance somehow calls into question their own sexuality.
That comes from not understanding or (not) being educated about what it is to be homosexual, and for many in the US being raised in a Judeo-Christian background, there is guilt associated with anything related to sexuality. Society as well, while trying to be more accepting of the gay and lesbian communities, is still and always will, as long as religion dominates society, have problems and misunderstandings with said communities and people. It is an us vs them attitude which in the long run divides and hurts us all.
Until American's from young children on up come face to face with their sexuality and are educated to be accepting of people for who they are, this problem will continue to exist for eternity.