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The OFFICIAL Diru Thread of Lies

Me: *tries to cuddle with Miyavi and Toshiya*
Miyavi: So cold... *shivers*
Toshiya: *pulls Miyavi closer*
Me: *thinking* Damn... this ghost thing has a few minor setbacks
Miyavi: *leans in closer to Toshiya*
Toshiya: *blushing* Do you really think we should...
Miyavi: *puts his finger on Toshiya's lips* Toshiya... your talking to much
Me: *thinking* This is so great... no nosebleeds... no death!
*insert passionate kiss followed my unavoidable fangirl squeal which totally and completely ruins the beautiful shonen-ai moment*
Lights switch back on
Miyavi: PINKKILLER
Toshiya: *blushing like crazy*
Me: Oh hi guys... I thought this was errr... the restroom...?
Miyavi: Wait... why are you all see through?
Me: Oh... there was a who's got the bigger... err... you know... and well a few items of clothing were removed... and well you know how that goes... I died... a little
Toshiya: You look so cool... *sticks hand through pinkkiller's stomach and giggles*
Miyavi: *grabs Toshiya's hand away* Would you stop that?
Toshiya: *embarassed* umm *sheepishly*...who took off their clothes?
Me: Gackt and Kaoru
Toshiya: I missed it... I mean... those two... whatever
Miyavi: *death glare*
 
pinkkillerkisou said:
Contrary to popular belief Kyo is very self concious about his injuries... both self inflicted and inflicted by others... he seem alll "Waaaahhhhh" and crazy but he's really just a down-to-earth take home to meet the parents kinda guy... I would compare him to a daisy... maybe a lily... he's a delicate little fellow.

:D what, take home so he can barf all over them!?
anyway, it is true (VERY TRUE, HOW DARE YOU DISPUTE IT!!!) that daisuke-sama and i are engaged...yes, we spaned the language barrier, and i am pregnant with his fourth child, soon to be named Lord Daisuke-Sama VII. sweet, isn't it? we both have the same birthday, so it was destiny!! (actually that's the truth, DECEMBER 20TH, OH WHAT NOW!?!?!?) (the part about destiny was true as well...er...heh...:D)
 
thank you mucho, you can come to the wedding! it's...er...soon. TOMORROW!! everyone is invited!!! yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay (bring presents!!!) :D
 
Yay! I love weddings... I'm bringing Kaoru as my date... orrrrrr...... how about a double wedding? :p

Tomorrow's a little soon... *has only 24 hours to get convince Kaoru or get him drunk enough to say yes*

What would you like for a present... pancake batter? XD
 
Me: So now we're going to a wedding all of a sudden? *is standing outside of bedroom door where Miyavi and Toshiya is* Damn, and I was soo close too.. I though I would finally get some action.. *sigh* Oh, well. Wedding it is! *changes into black dress* What? I'm not the one getting married... *grabs hold of Aya* You, come with me!
Aya: Hey!
Me: Don't worry, I wont marry you. I only want you to be my company...
Toshiya and Miyavi: *all of a sudden appearing, dressed up for wedding, together*
Me: *dies*
Aya: Shall we go?
Miyavi: I'm ready!
Aya: Come on already! *pulls Isayhello who is dead*
Toshiya: YA! Wedding!!!
 
yes! a double wedding! fine, is 48 hours good? i hate to make Daisuke wait...
:D nono, save the pancake batter for my wedding with Kyo-kun! for this one...mm...how about short-shorts for Daisuke!
Me: yay! a wedding, a WEDDING! 🎊
Daisuke: CRAP! i can't wait, darling, let's elope!
Me: oh, you know i would love to, but we have so many guests coming, it would be rude (plus i want PRESENTS. someone please give me miyavi or Kyo-kun as a gift! :( pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeease...)
Daisuke: AH! A RIVAL!! fear not my love, i shall defeat this terrible foe in a battle of sexiness!
Me: *swoon* (i don't know if i could handle so much sexiness all at once!!)
 
You mean... Macabre tour shorts :D ...I could arrange that XD *starts wrapping them and typing pretty bows to put on it*

Me: *is still a ghost* I know there's like this huge barrier between us... but I think we could make it
Kaoru: Your a ghost... I can stick my hand right through you *does so*
Me: You discriminating against me cause I'm a ghost... fine marry some solid... human... living... breathing... girl... she'll never care for you like I do *fake cries*
Kaoru: *shakes head* Where's the wand?
Me: OMG! your like a knight in shining armor... your gonna bring me back to life.
Kaoru: No... I was just wondering...
Me: This is the happiiest day of my life... errr... death
Kaoru: Well... atleast your noticing me...
Me: What's that supposed to mean... *meany look*
Kaoru: You were all over everyone else... and never noticed me
Me: Nahhh... that's not true
Kaoru: Really...
Me: What about the time we spent at the tea party... or the candy store... orr... uhhh... when I was 1 cm tall and sitting in you pocket... think of the good times
Kaoru: Well...
Me: C'mon... please
Kaoru: You left me to go watch yaoi
Me: ...and I'll never do it again I promise *doesn't mean it*
Kaoru: You mean it?
Me: Absolutely! *really doesn't mean it*
Kaoru: Really?
Me: I said yes didn't I? *has no intention of EVER meaning it*
Kaoru: Well...
Me: *sparkly eyes*
Kaoru: ..........
Me: OH C'MON DAMN IT
Kaoru: Can we atleast bring you back to life?
Me: How do you expect to do that.... and you do not want me cause I'm a ghost *points in his face*
Kaoru: How do you expect to.... do... ummm... anything?
Me: Being by you side for all eternity is enough *gets all sparkly eyed and romantic like*
Kaoru: Wow... no one has ever said anything to me like that before
Me: ...is that a yes?
Kaoru: ...sure why not!
Me: Sure why not? What no.... "I want to spend eternity with you too" or "I love you more then life itself" ...OK ...I'll take what I can get. *does happy bride to be ghost dance*
 
(you are...so cold to him! ><; haha, i guess i wouldn't be able to remain faithful, either...WON'T be able to, actually...heh...)
*sits down to look at wedding dress catalogue with Shinya, who came over for tea*
me: how about that one?
Shinya:...too...pink.
me:that one?
shinya: i hate bows.
me: this isn't going to be YOUR dress, you know, i'm the one wearing it.
shinya:...fine, see if i care.
me:WAITWAITWAIT, you're right, too many bows! (don't leave me shinya!!!)
shinya:how about that one?
me:...it's...black.
shinya:so?
me:i'm not dead. it's a wedding.
shinya: but it's so pretty. think how good you'd look in that with a flower garland in your hair...*sparkly eyes* it reminds me of my Akura no Oka dress...
me:but i'm not flat, it won't look as...er...fitted...
shinya:ah, well, we can't all be overly-skinny, too-pale, sexy androgynous boys, now can we?
me: good point...okay, the black dress it is!
 
Me: *cries* I always get like this before weddings... *cries*.. weddings are soo romantic! *cries* I'm soo happy for their sake! *cries*
Aya: Please.. the wedding hasn't even started yet!
Me: *cries even more on Ayas shoulder* I know!! But... only THINKING about it makes me this moved!
Aya: ... (why do I always end up with the loosers?)
Miyavi: How do I look? *wearing a suit*
Toshiya: ... ok I guess... *smiling* .. no, you look great!
Miyavi: Thanks. *blush*
Me: You two? *tears replaced by nosebleed* Are you two getting m... married?
Aya: Isay! Your dress!!! *tries to protect it from blood*
Miyavi: Ha-ha-ha! *awkward laugh* Like I'd ever wanna marry HIM!
Toshiya: Yeah, ha-ha! Miyavi's waaay too skinny for me! *awkward*
Miyavi: (Too skinny?) ... ha-ha... 'getting married'.. ha-ha... good one!
Toshiya: (not really too skinny) ... I'd never think of marriage in my age... !
Me: *dissappointed* I guess... not. (But you're already fighting like a married couple!)
Toshiya: No, we only dressed up cause we're gonna WATCH the OTHERS marry... double wedding and all... gonna be fun!
ME: *crying again* I know!
Miyavi: Okies. So now we just sit around and wait for them to appear?
Me: Here? *looking around* Where is this? There's really nothing here!
Toshiya: Someone forgot to come up with a scenery for this story! ... we left the Scary House behind...
Aya: Why not let the wedding take place... take place in.. in... A PINK FAIRY TALE LAND!!! *pink fairy tail land suddenly appears*
Miyavi: Pink! I like pink! *picks chocolate from a pink tree*
Me: YAY! *lifts up a bunny*
Toshiya: It's TOO PINK! *sour* We couldn't have a wedding HERE... it's too... fluffy!
Me: But.. there are bunnies!
Toshiya: NO. Let's have the wedding in... in... a DARK CATHEDRAL with VAMPIRES as guests! *dark cathedral appears*
Aya: Help! *a vampire has attempted to drink his blood*
Me: he-he... that's quite sexy... *looking at the vampire and Aya*
Miyavi: Too dark.. *scared again*
Toshiya: Now THIS is a proper setting! *pleased*...
Me: It's OK I guess... Hello! *says hello to a vampire*
Aya: *struggling with vampire* But... I... *hits vampire* ... ouch... I... mean... shouldn't we ask the couples where they wanna marry? Ouch! *vampire bit him*
Me: OK, we'll wait here untill the couples decide in what setting they wanna marry!
 
Me: *floats around cathedral* This suck... there are no wedding catalogs for ghosts... how insensitive... now being alive doesn't sound like such a bad thing... sure I can float through walls and watch yaoi undetected... well almost undetected but...
Kaoru: Well maybe we could use the wand to make you alive again?
Me: But isn't it still really small from when I shrunk... and it never worked properly to begin with...
Kaoru: I suppose so
Me: *cries* I don't wanna be a ghost... I'm gonna be stuck in this stupid outfit forever... I hate skirts... *cries more*
Kaoru: *attempts to comfort*
Me: *cries more* You can't even hug me to comfort me... This is so awfull *cries many more ghost tears*
Kaoru: Hey... c'mon. It's not so bad is it.
Me: Yes it is *sobs uncontrollably*
Kaoru: No nosebleeds...
Me: I'd rather nosebleed... *sniff* ...I'm going back to the mansion
Kaoru: But...
Me: I'm going to find the wand... and my body
Kaoru: But... wait... you'll miss the wedding
Me: No I won't... *floats off*
Kaoru: But how will you...
Me: *floats through wall*
Kaoru: ...pick up the wand and use it *sigh*
Kyo: *pops out of nowhere* You gonna go help her or what?
Kaoru: I'm sure she'll figure it out when she get there

...an hour later somewhere in the mansion

Me: *gasping for breath* Who knew you could get tired when your dead... It was around here somewhere... Ah ha! *points* there's my body... eww... do I really look that bad alive...

floats closer and looks at face

I don't think the wand could even fix that... wait... why didn't anyone give me a proper burial... everyone hates me... *cries more ghost tears*

CREEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAKKKK

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!! What was that... *looks around*

???: Helllloooo!
Me: Eep! You again... wait you can't touch me.... nah nah nah nah *sticks tongue out*
Mansion Owner: Would you like me to help you?
Me: You.... help me? Yea right!
Mansion Owner: I can bring you back to life
Me: Oh yea you have that "evil scientist lair" in the basement... the one I tried to use to bring Miyu-chan back to life.
Mansion Owner: Yes.
Me: But look... my bodies already... ewwww *throws up* mannn... no nosebleeds but I can still throw up... no wait... that's cool... *throws up again*
Mansion Owner: Don't worry you'll be good as new.
Me: How long will it take?
Mansion Owner: 7 hours
Me: WHAT!!! 7 hours... I having a wedding... that 7 hours better include a wedding dress and makeover.
Mansion Owner: Alright then but that will cost you more
Me: Wait... this isn't free
Mansion Owner: Of course not... that would be absurd.
Me: Whatever happened to the satifaction of knowing you helped someone out?
Mansion Owner: You can't buy food and pay bills with satisfaction can you?
Me: I suppose not... alright how much
Mansion Owner: 3 million dollars
Me: WHAT!!!???!!!???
Mansion Owner: Is that too much?
Me: *nervous laughter* No of course not... *has no intention of giving him any money whatsoever*
Mansion Owner: Then it won't be a problem?
Me: Nope
Mansion Owner: Alright then... shall we go to the lair then?
Me: But of course...
 
*walks through scary cathedral with shinya-kun*
shinya:nice going, toshiya! this is AWESOME.
me:*shiver* it's a little...darkandscaryandHUANTED!! EEK! *screams as something rustles in the corner*
shinya:*glare* it's beautiful. LOADS better than that stupid pink-aya-land...
me:but it would have been so cute if i were to get married there in my pink wedding dress...*stops talking at another death-glare from shinya* anyway, we at least need candles...how am i supposed to see daisuke when they say 'make out with the bride'? i want to be able to bask in his hotness all day - AH! *trips and falls*
kyo:that was my leg...please get off, you're fat.
me: :( waaaaaaaaah, i'm sorry kyo-kun, but please don't call me faaaaaaaaaaaaat...
kyo: stop crying, it's unbecoming.
kaoru: i've lost my fiance, anyway, and you're wasting time.
shinya: *hits forehead with hand* where'd she go? we have a wedding to start!
kaoru:*shrug* to look for her body...
me: BY HERSELF!? THAT CREEPY MANSION GUY IS THERE!!!
kyo:...i told him to help...
kaoru:i'm sure she'll be fine...
me:...okay...
*footsteps*
Daisuke:*pant pant* there you are! aHAH! you three are trying to betray me!! fear not, my love, i shall protect you from these serial rapests!
me:...you were planning on rapeing me?? *is interested*
shinya: of course not! get your mind out of the gutter!! *is obviously lying*
me: (uh-oh, i think my nose is gonna start bleeding)...don't worry, daisuke, i'm sure i can handle this...heheh...why don't you go change into your tux? (get out of here so they can rape me!!)
daisuke:never! 'until death do us part!'
me:WE'RE NOT MARRIED YET, YOU FOOL!
kyo:seriously, Die, don't make me throw up on you...
daisuke:*hesitant* you wouldn't...
kyo:i'll count to ten before i start hurling blood.
daisuke:...that's...really gross...
kyo:1...2...3...
daisuke:darling?
me: yes??
kyo:4...5...
daisuke: remember what i said about 'till death do us part'?
me:yes...
kyo:6...7...8...9...
daisuke:i lied! *runs away*
kyo:10!! *hurl*
shinya: ugh, that's nasty...
me:*impressed* wow, kyo kun! sugoi!! *jams finger down throat in an effort to throw up so she can be as cool as kyo-kun*
shinya:*smacks my hand away from mouth* cut that out, it's bad for you.
me:*dissapointed*...will you still rape me?
kaoru:nah, the blood vomit is makeing me feel sick, lets find a window or something so we can get fresh air.
kyo:*wipes blood off mouth* i wonder if there's anybody else in this place...
shinya:dunno...just don't vomit anymore, you'll scare them away...

meanwhile...

daisuke:*pant pant* how did kyo know...my only weakness...*pant pant*...is BLOOD VOMIT...
*sits against wall* how will i ever rescue my darling fiance...?

*vampire appears slowly*
Vampire:i'll help you...
daisuke:...you're...really scary looking...*is scared*
vampire:...thanks a million. and here i was, going to help you, and all. it's called make up, you half wit.
daisuke:...oh. i thought your lips were just naturally black...
vampire:...*sigh*...
daisuke:I'm sorry! please help! who are you?
vampire:my name is Gackt. Gackt Camui. i can help you.
daisuke:gackt...(sounds like clingon food...) how?
Gackt:i have seen your short, barfing friend. i know his blood vomit is your weakness. but i EAT blood. i can get rid of his vomit for you.
daisuke: (what!?) YOU'RE GOING TO EAT HIS BARF!?!? THAT'S NASTY!!
gackt:I'M DESPERET, OKAY!? i am in a very emotional state right now! i haven't had anything to eat in MONTHS, and i'm starving!! it's Hyde's fault, HE turned me into a vampire! my family's gone, i was almost killed by my friend from taiwan, and to top it off, everyone thinks i'm getting plastic surgery done, and that i look like michael jackson!! i can only take so much before i crack! i have feelings too, you know!! 😭
daisuke: okay, okay! i'm sorry!
gackt:...you mean it??
daisuke:*doesn't mean it* yes.
gackt:...okay...*sniff*...i'll help you...
daisuke: (finally...) alright, kyo, here i come!!
 
[LOL YAS! GO VAMPIRE GACKT!]

*wanders about cathedral*
Me: Hello?
Echo: *hello...hello...hell...hel...he..h..*
Me: WOW! An echo! ECHO ECHO ECHO!!! WHEEEE!!!!
*echoing madly*
Me: Wow... so romantic... where is everyone? I want Gackt. If he doesn't eat me. and uses breath mints. I mean, barf? EW!
*echo*
Me: WHEEE!!!
 
Gackt: did i hear...an echo???...
daisuke: (this guy is wack) it's all in your head, i'm sure.
gackt:...meanie...:(
 
Me: *floats into laboratory*
M.O.: Well you said you were in a hurry so lets get to it
Me: I'm not paying if I turn out looking like I popped out the Ain't Afraid to Die PV *still has no real intention of paying*
M.O.: Trust me... you'll look even better. *plops her corpse on table*
Me: Yeeshh... be gentle okay... I have to use that body later... How do you plan on getting my soul back into my body?
M.O.: Don't worry you won't feel a thing *Pulls out huge syringe*
Me: What... that wasn't my question?
M.O.: *stick needle in corpse*
Me: Ewww... *throws up for the heck of it* Hey can you stil make me able to throw up on command?
M.O.: Sure...consider it a wedding present *pulls out weird purply glowing device and starts pressing button*
Me: Hey mister... what's that?
M.O.: Still trying to come up with a catchy name... basically it will suck you soul in to this tube then I can inject it back into your body...
Me: Sounds cool! ........hey... wait...
M.O.: *pushes more buttons and device turns on*
Me: Eeep!
M.O.: *sucks pinkkiller's soul into device*
 
me: *checks watch impatiently* where IS she!? i'm booooooooored...hey kyo-kun! let's make out just for fun!!
kyo:...i just vomited...that's...gross...
me: i still love you *jumps kyo*
shinya: me too, me too!! *jumps kyo*
me: the more, the marrier!
kyo: GYAH! *is smothered*
kaoru: *sigh* children...
 
Me: *on the other side of the cathedral with Aya, Toshiya and Miyavi-sama* Hey, I hear echoes.. the others must be over there somewhere. Man, this cathedral is HUGE!
Toshiya: It's nice though... *proud that he came up with the idea*
Me: It's OK... *checks out another vampire* Do you have a thing about vampires, since you seem to..err.. have invited so many of them?
Toshiya: Off course! Vampires are hot! *looks at the vampires*
Miyavi: .. oh... hot are they? *jealous* Too bad I can't drink blood... *sour*
Toshiya: Mm, yeah. I love vampires.
Miyavi: I don't. *sour*
Toshiya: Did you have to get sour?
Miyavi: I'm not sour. *sour*
Me: *sparkly eyes* You're soo cute when you're sour!
Toshiya: And you are REALLY sour right now, Myv! *smile*
Miyavi: I'M NOT SOUR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *SOUR*
Me: kawaii!
Miyavi: DAMN YOU ALL! *strides off*
Toshiya: Wait.. ! *shonen-ai romantic* Now he got angry...
Aya: Nevermind him. He couldn't stand the though that the vampires might be hotter than him.. you know how conceited he is...
Me: *nods head* Yup!
Toshiya: Whatever. *chases after Miyavi*
Me: *dies* They're SOO good together! *dies again to prove my point*
Aya: ... You know... you seem to have a slight obsession.
Me: ...? *doesn't understand*
Aya: Actually... nevermind! *sigh*
Me: So... Aya. Not that we're alone..
Aya: I don't want to marry you.
Me: Oh. Ok. But you'll go to the wedding with me?
Aya: Sure.
Me: Yay!
---
Me and Aya: *reaching Drain Away and the others* Hello.
Everybody: Hi. Welcome.
Me: So.. I guess now we're only waiting for Pinkkiller? Hope she's OK... being a ghost can be tough sometimes.. *worried*
 
Way more than 7 hours later

Me: *opens eyes* Wow... I can see... wait... I could do that already... hehe.
M.O.: How do you feel?
Me: Tingly... *twitches*
M.O.: That would be all those volts of electricity I had to shock you with to get you body to jump start back to life... it should wear off soon.
Me: *still twitching* I should get going... don't want to miss the wedding... Bye thanks for everything!
M.O.: Aren't you forgetting something?
Me: What could you possibly mean?
M.O.: My money...
Me: What money? Sorry... the operation made things a little hazy... I don't remember *is obviously lying*
M.O.: The 3 million dollars you owe for the procedure
Me: Oh... that money *nervous laughter*
M.O.: You said it wasn't an issue
Me: Oh no... I just left it... on the top floor of the mansion... under a floorboard... in... a... a... umm... closet!?!?
M.O.: Good... I'll go with you to get it.
Me: Ohh.. fantastic... I do enjoy company *nervous laughter*

The Mansion Owner follows pinkkiller up the stairs to the top floor

Me: *thinking* OMG... where are they... I know they are here damn
M.O.: Are we getting closer... I get the feeling you are lying to me.
Me: I never lie... *is obviously lying*
M.O.: Well then... we should be close.
Me: *looking around frantically*
M.O.: What's the matter...
Me: *nervous laighter* Oh nothing... just retracing my steps is all *thinking* OMG he is going to kill me... where are they... Ah ha... ...it's over here.
M.O.: There are no closets over there...
Me: Please... don't you think I would know where I hid it?
M.O.: No.
Me: Riiiiiiight here *whack Mansion Owner in the head with candlestick, puts on Gackt's Merveilles wings and flys out window*

arrives a few minutes later at the cathedral

Me: *crash lands on her butt* Ouchies... *sniff*
Kaoru: Your made it... and your alive *hugs*
Me: *shocks him*
Kaoru: Ouch... you shocked me
Me: Yea... that was all that electricity he had to use to get me alive again... hehe.
Kaoru: Did you thank him.
Me: Oh... yes of course... a very proper thanks *giggle*
Kaoru: What did you do...
Kyo: Hey your alive again.
Me: Hey Kyo... watch this *vomits* The Mansion Owner gave me the ability to throw up on command... as a wedding present
Kyo: No way... that's so cool. *vomits too*
Kaoru: Wow... that's just... great *sarcastic*
Me: I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship
Kaoru: The wedding is starting soon...
Me: Crap... no dress... no makeup... I should have waited till he gave me all that stuff before I killed him *covers mouth* Oops!
Kaoru: YOU KILLED HIM... I'M MARRYING A MURDERER... this is just too much... is it just me or is everything spinning... I need to sit down *does so*
Kyo: I'll take her if you don't want her.
 
Me: *cries* Oh! Oh! You're all here! I'm soo happy for your sake! *cries*
Kaoru: I'M MARRYING A MURDERER!!??? *sitting down*
Me: *cries* .. you're soo lucky! .. *cries*
Pinkkiller: I.. didn't kill him? *doesn't really know if the wound became fatal*
Me: *cries* ... marriage... wedding.. *cries*
Kyo: *trows up just for fun*
Me: *cries* This is soo romantic! *cries*
Aya: Would you stop crying? Can't you see they're having a pre-marriage crisis!
Me: *stops crying* Huh?
Aya: They're arguing! Apparently, Pinkkiller killed someone...
Me: *slow to realize* Noo....... *stares in wonder*... really? I've never known a murderer before.... *stares in wonder at Pinkkiller*.. and on her weddingday too... soo tough... like in a movie... *sparkly eyes*
Aya: You watch too much television.
Me: Whatever.. you read too much manga...
Aya: *angry stare*
Me: *angry stare*
Toshiya: *running along with Miyavi at his side* Minna-san! We're back!
Miyavi : Did we miss something?
Me: .. apparently Pinkkiller killed the owner of the scary house and now Kaoru is having second thoughts about marrying her, and Kyo can't seem to stop vomiting...
Toshiya: Oh.. *looks around*... hey Kaoru!
Kaoru: *looks up from floor* What?
Toshiya: Wanna talk about it?
Kaoru: What? What? IF I wanna talk about MY FUTURE WIFE being a killer!!!?? *hysteric*
Miyavi: Geez... women... *squeezes Toshiyas hand*
Me: Did you by 'women' mean Kaoru or Pinkkiller just now? Or both? *confused*
Miyavi: *angry stare at Isay*
Me: *dies* (damn, still not immune to Miyavi)
Aya: Soo... do you put the wedding on hold, Kaoru? *needs to go to the bathroom*
---
 
waaaaaaaaah, i can't keep up with you guys...let's go back for a minute, shall we?? 😌

*Isay and Aya arrive*
Kyo: *slighty muffled* konnichiwa...
Me: Guten Morgen!
Shinya: it's not morning, you half-wit.
Me: er...Guten Nacht!
Isay: So.. I guess now we're only waiting for Pinkkiller? Hope she's OK... being a ghost can be tough sometimes.. *worried*

*pinkkiller shows up, blah blah blah, she and kyo start vomiting*

Pinkkiller: Hey Kyo... watch this *vomits* The Mansion Owner gave me the ability to throw up on command... as a wedding present
Kyo: No way... that's so cool. *vomits too*
Kaoru: Wow... that's just... great *sarcastic*
Me: SUGOII!! *is jealous* i wish i could do that, too!
Kyo: it's easy, watch. *vomits*
Me: whoa! you're so cool, Kyo-kun!! *puts finger down throat in an attempt to vomit*
Shinya: *smacks Drain Away's hand* stop that, already!!
Kyo: and once you get really good, you can do this...*vomits blood while foaming at the mouth at the same time*
Me: *heart eyes*...so...cool...
Shinya: STOP IT, KYO, YOU'RE A BAD INFLUENCE ON HER!!

*blah blah blah*

Isay: *cries* Oh! Oh! You're all here! I'm soo happy for your sake! *cries*
Kaoru: I'M MARRYING A MURDERER!!??? *sitting down*
Isay: *cries* .. you're soo lucky! .. *cries*
Pinkkiller: I.. didn't kill him? *doesn't really know if the wound became fatal*
Isay: *cries* ... marriage... wedding.. *cries*
Kyo: *trows up just for fun*
Shinya: Stop it, Kyo!
Me: *vomits while Shinya isn't looking*
Kyo: you did it!!
me: YAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!
Shinya: *gasp* NO! your beautiful Akura no Oka dress!! it's covered in VOMIT!! *faint*
Aya: Oh no, oh no!! *pulls Shinya's head in lap and starts to fan him*
Me: must...resist...the cuteness...*nosebleeds right as Shinya starts to come to*
Shinya: *tries to plug Drain Away's nose* ...the dress...*mad scientist laughter* everything's ruined...*faints again*
Kyo: *still vomiting*
Toshiya: don't tire yourself, kyo, we still have a wedding to go to.
Miyavi:...maybe.
Me:HEY! I'm still getting married, and i don't want your negativity at the reception!!
Miyavi. oh, right. and your fiance is...where??
Me:...good point...*shifty eyes* HEY KYO!
Kyo: URK!!
Me: *falsely-sweet voice* Ky~o Ku~n...help me find Daisuke...please?? *pretty eyes*
Kyo: (her voice...too sweet...i think i'm gonna be sick...) *is sick for real*
Me: stop that, kyo, we're wasting time!
Kyo:...i...feel ill...
Me: nice try, but i'm not gonna fall for that. let's go, Mr. Bigshot Barfy Man! *grabs Kyo's wrist and literally starts to drag him*
Kyo:*pleading look at everyone* minna...please help...
Everyone: *shrug*
Kyo: :(

meanwhile...

Gackt: *pant pant* we've...been walking...for so long...*pant wheeze*...where...are they??
Daisuke: *wheeze pant*...i...don't know...😌
Gackt:*pant*...i...really hate you...*sits against wall*
Daisuke: *pant pant* you're...no prize...yourself...*sits next to Gackt and tries to shove him, but lacks the energy*
Me: DAISUKE!!! *sees Gackt* (whoa...he's hot...) hi, what's your name??
Kyo:...uh...
Me:...Kyo's right. i should focus.
Kyo:what!? i didn't -
Me: KYO! I'M FOCUSING!! *sugar-sweet voice* Dai~suke~...let's go get married...*pretty eyes*
Daisuke:...IT'S HIM!! THE PINT-SIZED, BACK-STBBING "FRIEND" WHO KEEPS TRYING TO RAPE MY FIANCE!!
Gackt: a-HA! FEAR ME, OH BARFING MORTAL.
Kyo: what!?
Me: quick, Kyo! barf at him to make him go away!
Gackt: yes! barf! BARF!!
Kyo: okay! *tries to vomit but only foam comes out*...i'm...hungry...
Me: try the blood!!
Gackt: yes, YES!!
Kyo: *vomits blood and promptly passes out from blood loss*
Daisuke: You did it! you defeated him!
Gackt: *eats blood*
Daisuke:...ew...
Me:KYO-KUN!! *rushes over and puts his head on her lap* oh Kyo, you are so noble!! *heart eyes*
Daisuke: CURSES! even incapacitated, my k*****ness is no match for his!! what is his secret!?
Me: *still heart eyed* oh Kyo! *glomp* you are so absolutely wonderful!! to think you sacrificed yourself for my sake! oh what a good, kind person you are!!
Kyo: ...i feel...so weak...what a powerful enemy...
Gackt:*still eating blood* never have i tasted blood so great!
Daisuke: *sulking in corner* what does he have that i don't?? i mean, i'm taller, better looking, i can play guitar, and i even look hot in shorty-shorts! what does she see in him!?
Me:*sob*...Daisuke...:(
Daisuke: (nows my chance to come to her rescue!!) yes dear? what is it?? *rushes over and kneels down while taking Drain Away's hand* anything for you!!
Me:...my dress...is ruined...and...i'm unfaithful...but...*hick sob*
Daisuke: yes?? what is it??
Me: could you still help me carry Kyo-kun back to the others??
Daisuke: (*sigh* he defeats me again...) of course.
Me: really??
Daisuke: really.
Me: *squeel* oh Daisuke!! *glomp* you're so wonderful!! i knew i could count on you! you the best! i can't wait till we're married!!
Daisuke: (SCORE!! take THAT, Kyo!) *glomps back* Of course darling, neither can i!!
Kyo:...my head...you're squishing me...can't...breathe...
Me: sorry, Kyo! come on, Daisuke, let's take him back!
Daisuke: (i'm good) right!
Gackt: *still eating blood* it's so...good...h-hey, wait for me!!
*the four go back to the others*
Miyavi: HEY LOOK!! IT'S MICHAEL JACKSON!! OMGEVERYONEQUICKHIDEYOURBABIES!!
Gackt:...why me??? :(
 
Me: *throws up again for the heck of it* This is just too much... *starts crying*
Kaoru: Too much... what about me? I'm marrying a murderer... I must be dreaming... this has to be a nightmare
Me: I went through a lot to come back to life just for you... *cries harder*
Kaoru: Did you really have to kill him?
Me: He asked me for 3 million dollars... I didn't have it... he would have killed me.
Kaoru: But still...
Me: ...it was self defense... sort of.
Everyone: *staring at the both of us*
Me: Maybe we should go somewhere a little more private to discuss this.
Kaoru: Yea... I guess.
Me: Do you need help getting up?
Kaoru: No... I'm fine... I can do it myself.
Me: Are you sure... you look really pale.
Kaoru: I'm fine *stands up*
Me: Ok... I guess we should go outside or something.
Kaoru: Alright... murderers... I mean ladies first.
Me: *depressed sigh*

Pinkkiller and Kaoru are sitting on a bench in a very creepy dead garden outside the creepy cathedral

Me: I'm really sorry. I've been very cruel to you and I have caused you lots of grief. Truth is... I don't know how to act around you... I'm scared to scare you away. I am so used to pushing people away from me... it's easier that way... to convince yourself you hate everyone. I'm sorry... I really am.
Kaoru: No... I overreact.
Me: No you don't... I'm completely and utterly spastic and annoying... it's a miracle you put up with me so long...
Kaoru: Your not that bad...
Me: Really...
Kaoru: Well a little... but that makes you special.
Me: You know what... lets leave the wedding to the lovebirds. I can't be a wife... that's like... weird.
Kaoru: I guess your right...
Me: Great... I'm glad that's settled... *looking around*
Kaoru: *scratches head* Umm... so now what.
Me: I dunno...
Kaoru: We should get to know eachother better I think first... marriage is a little drastic...
Me: Yea... and a little soon too... what the hell was I thinking. *blush*
Kaoru: Your just impulsive.
Me: Am not... well... maybe a little.
Kaoru: A little?
Me: Ok... a lot.
Kaoru: Well I guess we should go back in... the other may be worrying.
Me: Alright... *stands up*
Kaoru: I think you should change for the service... you have a little blood on your dress.
Me: Oh how embarassing... *tries to wipe it off*
Kaoru: *out the corner of his eye he see a creepy fountain* Man look at that... Kyo would love that...
Me: What?
Kaoru: That fountain... *points*
Me: Eww... it bleeds instead of water... there are vampires here after all... it makes sense...
Kaoru: Wouldn't you think it would spit out blood... it's gushing from the head...
Me: Yea that is kind of weird... *starts walking towards it*
Kaoru: *follows pinkkiller* I don't want to get to close... I'l ruin my suit.
Me: That's funny... he looks awfully familiar *looks closer*
Kaoru: Am I seeing things or did the statue just blink
Me: I think it did... wait... I know who it looks like. It looks just like that creepy guy from the mansion...
Kaoru:That's strange:
Me: Oh man... it is him... RUN!

The two run inside the cathedral and through many corridors

Kaoru: *still running* I thought you killed him...
Me: *stops to catch her breath* Sorry... I didn't stick around to find out if he was dead... I was kinda panicked and in a hurry...
Kaoru: *stops too out of breath* C'mon... lets hide in here... *grabs pinkkiller and pulls her into a random chamber*
Me: It's really dark...
*footsteps*
Kaoru: Did you hear that?
Me: OMG! OMG! I'm gonna die... where are you *searches for Kaoru*
Kaoru: Over here
Me: *grabs hold of an arm* Thank God... don't leave me ok...
Kaoru: Who are you talking to... I'm over here.
Me: Eep! Then who is this.
 
Me: *felt Pinkkiller grabbing her arm* Eek! Who's that!!? Pinkkiller? *hits whoever it is in selfdefence*
Pinkkiller: Ouch!
Kaoru: Isay? What the HELL! You scared us.. could have been that guy from the manison... What are YOU doing here!? *annoyed*
Me: *realizes who they are* OMG.. I'msoosorryplease!!! I'msorrysorry!!!
Kaoru: *annoyed* Why are you here?
Me: I... I.. heard someone... something creepy comming through the hallway while I was looking for a bathroom... *scared out of her senses* And.. he was bleeding from the head...
Kaoru and Pinkkiller: *knows who Isay is talking about* Was he near here?
Me: Yeah.. sort of... I mean... felt as if he was looking for someone... he sorta followed me.. I think...
Kaoru: GREAT! so now you LEAD him to us!!!?
Me: huh? You know him? *suddenly hear something slowly walking over the floor in other side of the room* ... that's him right there! *can't see in the dark but knows still*
Kaoru: *freaks out* HELP HELP! This is by faaaaar the scariest things I've experienced ever.. *throws himself at Pinkkiller*
Me: Isn't.. it supposed to be Pinkkiller throwing herself at you?
Creepy Manison Guy: .... ooooohhhaaaaaawwww............... *sounds REALLY scary*
Me: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
Pinkkiller and Kaoru: AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
---
---
Somewhere completely different:
Toshiya: Seems like there's gonna be no wedding... people just can't decide..
Miyavi: Nah. So.. what to do now?
Aya: Dunno. Where's Kaoru, Pinkkiller, Isay and Drain Away?
Miyavi: Isay went to find a bathroom, Kaoru and Pinkkiller might be having a romantic time somewhere for all I know.. Drain Away was with Kyo and Gackt.. they were throwing up when last I saw them...
Toshiya: Man.. everyone is really enjoying themselves.. I'm bored!
Aya: We could... eat?
Miyavi: Great idea, but there's no food.
Aya: Oh yes there is: I made one appear: *points to a dinnertable suddenly appearing*
Toshiya: Fancy. I'm hungry.
*they all sit down by table*
 
Ok well did you know that during and interview in Berlin the interviewer (rohnald dass-hess) was asking kyo how exactly he got the smuges around his eyes perfect, Kyo then took out his blush and applied it and got it in his eye, flipped out and threw a chair thinking it was out the window but by "accident" hit mr.Hess in the face, then after that mr.Hess took a cupcake from the refreshment stand, threw it at kyo and kyo went blind in the other eye and a huge food fight began..then kyo threw mr hess out of the window *they were on the 14th floor* he landed on a street light but because of mr.Hess's over weight*ness* he broke the streetlight which came crashing down on a museum, then THAT museum crashed onto the president of Germany..which then caused mayhem and orderd dir en grey to never return to Berlin..Or kyo would face the ultimate punishment...He would be tossed in a pool of fangirls.
Tru story, tru story.
 
*Drain Away, Kyo, Daisuke, and Gackt look around*

DA:where'd they go??
Gackt: *points* there's the one with black markings on his body who called me Michael Jackson!! *glare*
DA:yaaaaaaaaaaaaay foooooooooooooooooood!!
Kyo: food! i'll regain my vomit-powers!!
*both run over to dinner table with everyone else*
DA:QUICK!! WEDDING!! wedd- wait! where're pinkkiller and ka-chan??
Aya:...good question.
Toshi: Isay's gone too...
Miyavi: Michael Jackson here scared 'em away...
Gackt: :(

*screaming*

Kyo:what was that!?
shinya:eek!! *grabs Gackt, and then sees who he grabbed* EEK!!
Gackt: :(

DA:i'm getting married! this is SUPPOSED to be a happy occasion!! HAPPY...
Aya: *pointedly starts looking around at scary cathedral with dead leaves and graveyard* happy...?
DA:well, imma go find those guys.
Kyo: i'll go too. i think i can barf again.
DA: *sigh* so noble...
Daisuke: (oh no! he's trying to take her again!!) me too!!
DA: *fangirl-squeel* waaaaaaaaaah, Daisuke-kun, you're the best!!
Die: (score!!) oh, it's nothing, really...
Gackt: :( i wanna get away from these guys...so i'll go.
Shinya: me too.
DA:yaaaaaaaaaaaaay!!

*five walk away in search of the others*

Shinya: is it just me...or is it getting darker??
DA:it's just you, i thin-ouch! *trips and falls on face*
Daisuke:what happened??
DA:i tripped over something...*Daisuke helps her up* thanks. what was that??
Kyo: *bends down to look* it's...ew...*is sick*
shinya: this is no time to show off!!
kyo: i wasn't showing off!! *is sick again* it's a...leg...*sick*
shinya: nonsense. *bends downs to pick item up* it's a...*realizes it's a human leg with nothing attached* URK! *is sick*
DA: cool! look kyo, i practiced!! *vomits blood*
Kyo: unh...*is sick*
Gackt: foooooooooooooooood...
Daisuke: this is no time for that!
DA: *sees leg* EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK!!! *is sick for real*
Gackt: ew...i lost my appetite just now...*is sick*
Daisuke: why, Kami-sama, WHY!?!?
 
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