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Question Question about Visa/Japanese Documents

Paul0820

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Hello Everyone,

This is my first post. I joined because I'm facing a problem that I think this community might be able to help me with...

I started dating a girl about a month ago. We met online. She's a Japanese citizen that is here in nursing school and has her visa for school. She's great and

Here's the issue. She told me that she's 33, one year younger than I am. However, after doing some laundry at my place, I found her California ID when I took the clothes out of the dryer. Her ID says that she's not 33. It says she's much older. 20 years older.

She does not look to be in her 50's, but when I first met her, I did think she was older than me. I would have guessed upper 30's or possibly early 40's, but definitely not 50's. She does not have wrinkles on her face or her hands. Her hands are smooth and the skin is similar to mine.

I asked her about it. She said that there was a mix up and that her older sister's ID/Passport was incorrectly used when she applied for her US documents here and that the date of birth listed on her US documents actually have her sister's year listed and not hers. She said that her family was all born at home rather than in the hospital and because of this, registration/applying for a birth certificate was not done at the exact time of birth.

I've read that mistakes like this do happen, although I would assume that they would be extraordinarily rare. I assume that the process to verify documents is strict and controlled and hard to fool, intentionally or not.

I wanted to get your feedback here to determine if her story sounds plausible or if she is lying to me and just looks great for 50. I won't post pictures so please don't ask.
 

Uncle Frank

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Seems strange to me someone would wait till they are 33 to start nursing school let alone 53. I wonder if the school deal was just a way to get to see the US? Unless you are really serious and maybe even thinking marriage , I would just go with the relationship and enjoy it without sweating the details. Be interesting what others here will have to say.
 

tomoni

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"She said that there was a mix up and that her older sister's ID/Passport was incorrectly used when she applied for her US documents here and that the date of birth listed on her US documents actually have her sister's year listed and not hers. She said that her family was all born at home rather than in the hospital and because of this, registration/applying for a birth certificate was not done at the exact time of birth. "

her older sister's ID/Passport was incorrectly used when she applied for her US documents

Seriously? That is quite a stretch. The other "stretch is that side you did not mention it, I assume that "HER NAME" was on the California ID. If not, she is using her sister's name?

Anyway it is really quite a stretch. BUT Japanese women (all women??) have been known tobe sensitive about age particularly when dating a younger person. I would guess that she "looks young for her age"

If the "vanity" lie is not a deal breaker, don't sweat it. But if you are thinking long term/marriage etc., ag may be important in terms of having children...

But I think that it is likely she is "fibbing" (I think lying feels a bit too strong a word) about her age.

IMO, not the end of the world.
 

onsen07

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for what is worth my mother who was born in the usa had a different birthdate in japan birth registry. IF her parents are alive you might ask who is older she or her sister just out of curiosity.
 

SmudgyBuddy

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You'll realize in the future that some women can be convincing liars, while others can't.
If you let her get away with this, she is just gonna walk all over you.
Play with her, but I suggest being on the lookout for someone who doesn't lie, and then when you find that person, dump this old gal.

I don't care what nationality a girl is.
I know a lie is a lie, and it doesn't change the fact that she tried to deceive you.

She may think you're young and naive.
Think of this as a learning experience. If something is too good to be true, then it probably is.
 

mdchachi

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Japan has a very strong system of birth registration, especially in the post-war timeframe that we are talking about.
Although not unheard of, a sister 20 years older than her is quite rare. And using her sister's i.d. even if it did happen would not be an accident.
I would bet money that she's lying and is a young-looking 50-something year old. Is she really Japanese or is she lying about that too?
I'd be wary because this level of deceit sounds like it could be more than simple sensitivity about age especially now that she's compounding it by not coming clean.
Ask her what year she was born in Showa. If she hesitates for more than two seconds as she calculates that would be a clue.
 
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