Preference for Japanese woman?

[Haruspex]

Alabaster skin, brown hair and sparkling eyes.
I vote for the first picture. Especially that her hairstyle is less... umm... orderly.

 

[MadamePapillon]

1. Those SOME men seem ONLY the guy who rejected your friend, at least, here.
2. Japanese/Asian women and Japanese/Asian Canadian women are quite different.

Probably it is my poor English skill about my understanding above, but I still believe the strange reason of him was just his strategy, honne-tatemae, (white) lie, or whatever.
I don't know how small community he and your friend are in, but I am 100% sure that he knows how terrible it is when he gets all women hostile to him just because he would say the true reason to reject her. And I am 120% certain that he will create another eccentric reason when his new girlfriend is not Asian one.

My community isn't small at all. I live in a suburb of Vancouver and work in Burnaby. Just guesstimating but I'd say about half the population of Burnaby is Asian. If somebody here says they only like Asian women, chances are it's because they only like Asian women.
It's something that's becoming increasingly common here, the white guy/asian women pairing while the white girl/asian guy isn't nearly as common.

(Though incidentally one of my coworkers, a white girl, is dating a half Japanese guy. And one of my other white girl friends was just asked out by an Asian guy but had to reject him because she's really into one of my other guy friends who is half-Chinese .... it sounds like a soap opera but I guess truth is stranger than fiction.)

For Men, it's something different that was explained: fear of betrayal, no stability anymore, etc.

For some reason, this phenomenon is stronger in western countries, and if we add the "traditional image" that asian countries tend to gives off , it might explain partially why some people are attracted to asian ladies.

Want to know something from a western womens perspective? Men being insecure isn't the fault of the feminist movement or even the rise of strong, ambitious females, it's their own fault. This fear of ambitious women is not about women at all it's about the guy feeling insecure with themselves and their ability to stand beside such a woman and not be overshadowed or made to look weak.
Guys who choose girls who are meek and docile are usually looking for a girl they can feel like 'a real man' around because they feel they don't feel like they can be a 'real man' with a woman as or more ambitious and assertive as themselves. Meek women stroke the ego, that's what it comes down to.
Of course, on the other end of the spectrum, there are those guys who are attracted to assertive women so I suppose it all balances itself out.

p.s. Ever heard the saying 'it's the dogs that don't bark you should be most afraid of'?

 

[FrustratedDave]

Want to know something from a western womens perspective? Men being insecure isn't the fault of the feminist movement or even the rise of strong, ambitious females, it's their own fault. This fear of ambitious women is not about women at all it's about the guy feeling insecure with themselves and their ability to stand beside such a woman and not be overshadowed or made to look weak.
Guys who choose girls who are meek and docile are usually looking for a girl they can feel like 'a real man' around because they feel they don't feel like they can be a 'real man' with a woman as or more ambitious and assertive as themselves. Meek women stroke the ego, that's what it comes down to.
Of course, on the other end of the spectrum, there are those guys who are attracted to assertive women so I suppose it all balances itself out.
p.s. Ever heard the saying 'it's the dogs that don't bark you should be most afraid of'?

Or... Some men want a women with paternal instincts. Don't confuse someone wanting a wife to raise their kids as a women who is docile or meek. I would prefer to have my wife raise my kids than her go to work and have someone else do it, my wife also thinks the same way as I do. And just for the record, my wife is by far more powerful than I ever will be, I am the one being bossed around so you can strike that one off your list. A women can be very assertive but still not be a "feminist".

 

[dreamer]

Want to know something from a western womens perspective? Men being insecure isn't the fault of the feminist movement or even the rise of strong, ambitious females, it's their own fault. This fear of ambitious women is not about women at all it's about the guy feeling insecure with themselves and their ability to stand beside such a woman and not be overshadowed or made to look weak.
Guys who choose girls who are meek and docile are usually looking for a girl they can feel like 'a real man' around because they feel they don't feel like they can be a 'real man' with a woman as or more ambitious and assertive as themselves. Meek women stroke the ego, that's what it comes down to.
Of course, on the other end of the spectrum, there are those guys who are attracted to assertive women so I suppose it all balances itself out.
p.s. Ever heard the saying 'it's the dogs that don't bark you should be most afraid of'?

Personally, I don't feel like there's any insecurity comming from being overshadowed by a woman. On the contrary, if needs be, I'd be glad to switch roles. However, I doubt the increased criteria that women seek among potential mates has nothing to do with this insecurity...

Nevertheless, What I was talking about was more about the career woman type who's unlikely to take the time to raise her family, and just cares about her own life (I am not saying that such men do not exist though), and on this point, I agree with FrustratedDave. I might go even further (no offense), and say that such women might be a great date, but for a longer lasting relationship, I'm afraid it's not gonna work out.


PS: Yes we do have something equivalent in French: "Il n'est pire eau que celle qui dort"

 

[bakaKanadajin]

Men being insecure isn't the fault of the feminist movement or even the rise of strong, ambitious females, it's their own fault. This fear of ambitious women is not about women at all it's about the guy feeling insecure with themselves and their ability to stand beside such a woman and not be overshadowed or made to look weak.
Guys who choose girls who are meek and docile are usually looking for a girl they can feel like 'a real man' around because they feel they don't feel like they can be a 'real man' with a woman as or more ambitious and assertive as themselves.

Girls can be feminine (in the true sense, not the feminist movement sense) without being weak or docile. The reason I don't like caucasian women speaking from the perspective of attitude or character is because they lack grace and delicacy. And I repeat, having those things doesn't mean you're weak, however many Western women think it does.

It doesn't offend my manhood in the least if a woman is strong and assertive to the point of being overpowering or commanding. (Manhood and what that means to a man is a whole other topic.) I just find it really unattractive the same way a woman would probably find a limp, overly-sensitive kind of man unattractive.

 

[BakeNeko]

Different people have different preferences. Why can't you just leave it by that?
I mean, everyone has a different taste. That's just the way it is, isn't it.
And you can't even say Japanese women are like this and wester women are like that...
There are a lot of different types of women even amoung the same race.

 

[Remixer]

1. MadamePapillon, to be honest, I wouldn't think of myself as insecure. Rather, the exact opposite.

A strong woman is all fine and dandy, but why would I want her for?

She is independent, doesn't need me, frequently socializes with people and is quite happy by herself.

There would be no reason why she would need someone like me in her life.

Most such women probably think that being intimate with their partner is quite enough to make their relationship special as compared to normal and good friendships of hers.

To me, it isn't sufficient by a long shot. I give a lot to my partner, but I also expect a lot more out of the relationship.

There's no point for me to have a wife who doesn't need me other than for sex and intimate moments.

And yes, I realize that I am extremely picky.




2. The Feminist Movement did nothing but harm womanhood. Current society sees a lot of confusion in adolescents and is steadily moving backwards to male domination.

All that crap by the Feminist Movement is nothing but a farce which quite a lot of women happily deluded themselves into.

I have no problem with women living their lives as they want, it's their choice of course. However, they can't expect men with a high standard to fall in love with them and their stubborn attitude.

Not to speak of how female executives aren't discriminated against because of their gender but rather because of their mostly disruptive attitude.





Remixer

 

[MadamePapillon]

The Feminist Movement did nothing but harm womanhood. Current society sees a lot of confusion in adolescents and is steadily moving backwards to male domination.

See, I have a completely biased and opposite view. I say biased because I've seen first hand how badly a traditionalist relationship can go.

You see, unlike me, my mother was a traditionalist. She wanted nothing more than to raise her children, clean her house and look after her husband. So, she found a man, had kids and it was great until ... he left her for another woman.

So my mother, with three children and no skills aside from housekeeping was basically on her own with three kids to raise. Needless to say it didn't turn out well. Lots of poverty, humiliation and one bad stepfather later and here I am. A more 'feminist minded' female. Why? Because I had to be. At a very young age I was designated 'man of the house' and had to take care of my sickly (I still think it's all in her head) mother and my younger brother, my older sister had left by that point.

The moment I left home I did so with the intention of forging a career for myself and leaving all traces of my poor childhood behind. I did what I set out to do. Went to college, got an education, and I currently have a career in the video game industry. If it wasn't for the feminist movement that so many people here seem to despise I would never have had the resources that have gotten me where I am today. I pretty much would have been doomed to a life of poverty unless by some miracle I found a rich husband. What kind of life is that?

Say what you will about western women ruining the traditional state of marriage but for every shaved headed butch feminazi I'll show you a man who has neglected his paternal duty and decided he 'didn't want that kind of responsibility'.

 

[Pachipro]

But even Pachipro, who was very forward and honest, still said that given the choice between an equally good looking asian or western woman he would choose the Asian woman.

Yes because that is what I am most comfortable with, the way I am wired, and for the most part, they are 98% of the woman I have dated.

Of the two woman's pictures you posted they are both attractive in my opinion and only after dating them equally and getting to know them and their personalities could I make a rational decision.

I have even had the fortunate/unfortunate experience of dating a professional Japanese model in my younger years for two years who any man would just die for at first glance, but she was the biggest b*tch I ever met in my life and, with her beauty, was the most insecure person I ever met in my life. It reality it was hell. Therefore, one can not go on looks alone regardless of the race.

It's just something I've rarely seen with other races. It is only with white people (N. Americans specifically) , really, that I've seen where they will, in a way, put their own women aside for another countries women, even if all they are attracted to is a stereotype. Of all the races I've known white people are pretty much the only ones where a large number will look at a woman of their own race and basically say, you're not good enough ... these women are much more beautiful.

You alluded to in an above post that where you live virtually half the population is Asian. Well, what would you expect from a white man when half the women he meets are Asian? Of course they would be attracted to them perhaps as equally as white women and maybe a little more given the differences in culture and how Asian men treat their women and how white men treat them.

Therefore, the Asian woman may be more attracted to white men then white men are attracted to them and seek them out giving rage to white women much in the same way black women are upset when black men seem to prefer and date white, blond women. Isn't it a common cliche among white women that "once you go black, you never go back"?

I would never put my own race aside when it comes to women (and never have), nor would I put any other race aside as, to me, it's what's inside a person and what makes them them that is more important/attractive to me. In my own, limited experience though, I have had more success in compatibilty with Asian women than any other race and are drawn to them. Why? I cannot explain it as it is just the way it is. The same way another poster mentioned above that some people are attracted to women with big/small breasts; big/small butts; blonds, brunettes, etc, etc regardless of race.

It's the same way many North American women are attracted to tall, dark men; men with accents; men with chisled bodies; men with moustaches/beards; men who fit their mold of what they are attracted to.

Therefore, to just say that white men are more attracted to Asian women is misleading and a stereotype I believe in that there are probably more white women attracted to other types of men/men of different cultures/nationalities then they would let others believe. By other types of men I do not mean mean men of another race per se as most white women end up very disappointed in a relationship with Asian men or men of another race, but it is not the same as Asian women with white/foreign men as they have a whole different experience.

In the end, I believe it is how a person (male or female) is "wired", so to speak, in what he/she is attracted to and no one can ever attempt to explain it for it is not explainable and no one, not even psychologists, can offer a rational explaination. It's just the way we are. We are products of our environment, and our experiences and the majority of our decisions are based on that.

 

[Remixer]

See, I have a completely biased and opposite view. I say biased because I've seen first hand how badly a traditionalist relationship can go.

1. You simply don't get it, do you? I already pointed out that I'm everything but a traditional man.

In fact, I am probably more pro-woman than you and the Feminist Movement put together.

What you quoted there was my NEGATIVE opinion on the backwards evolution of society. It is not a good thing that male domination in its old form is coming back.

____________________________________________


2. I didn't quote the rest of your comment, because it is too long.

I agree with your assessment on neglectful parents. However, your opinion is extremely biased due to your personal experiences.

As there are idiot fathers who leave their wife and children for another woman, there just as many idiot mothers who leave their husband to be with another man.

Both scenarios rip families apart and affect the children negatively in most cases.

You are completely mistaken, if you believe that the Feminist Movement made way for you to have had the professional and educational opportunities you embarked on. Though, it would be too bothersome and long-winded to explain my position on this, so please forgive me in this regard.

All things aside, I am happy for you to have been able to get out of a messy situation as the one you were in.

________________________________________________


3. I simply have things I want from my future partner. I want her to be weak in front of me. That does not mean I am anti-woman and would close her up at home and make her do things she does not want to.

There are many ways to be strong and independent.

The disgusting attitude the Feminist Movement induced into women, falsely proclaiming that doing this and that are signs of strength and independence.

However, that is not the case. As I said, those so-called strong women are nothing but a farce, all hidden behind a mask of bullshit.

The cost of attaining this farce of strength and independence came at real strength, elegance, decency and a whole set of not only alluring but also FEMININE qualities in women.

The Feminist Movement is also responsible for meddling to ridiculous lengths in the business world and being quite disruptive. It is such behaviour that drives men against women and only amplifies an already bad situation.

The consequences for progression of women in society will be long-term and vast in magnitude.




Remixer

 

[Putrefaction]

I've never been attracted to them, but since I started learning the language I've noticed them more and more and been slightly more attracted to them. It's weird but understandable.

I'm normally disgusted at interracial relationships but that's just me.

 

[Damicci]

This goes to show the differences in people. Remixers wants would be completely opposite of what I look for in a woman.

I like independence, it shows she can make herself happy and in turn be alot happier even if I slack off a bit in the relationship.

I do agree that you don't have to be a Feminist to show strength. Just being an Independent woman and enjoying your life would be good enough. Not answering to the stereo typical calls of life.

Are we even able to get back on topic since I am not sure how much more discussion can go on as to what makes a Western man want to strictly date Asian women. There hasn't been one reason mentioned that I have never heard of.

 

[Adulado]

"watashi wa charisma man desu..."

 

[Jericho Desu]

I'm normally disgusted at interracial relationships but that's just me.

I must say I'm quite appalled at what you just stated here.

 

[Pachipro]

Now that is great post by MadamePapillon and is my type of woman whom I would like to meet given another place and another time regardless of hair color. In today's world a woman MUST have something to fall back on as there are many men who are not responsible. Therefore, before getting married and settling down, they should have some skill they can go back to or continue during marriage when, and if, the man leaves as is so prevelant today as more than 50% marriages today will end up in divorce. If the wife is just a housewife with no skills she is screwed and the state must look after her while going after the husbands paycheck to pay child support.

You see, unlike me, my mother was a traditionalist. She wanted nothing more than to raise her children, clean her house and look after her husband. So, she found a man, had kids and it was great until ... he left her for another woman.

Good point, but we are wandering off topic a bit I believe.

Don't get me wrong here, the wife (at least in the US), in almost half the cases, is also to blame for marriages failing as she also has a "wandering eye" or is overbearing or a nag, etc., and is at fault in at least half, but it is the man that is usually saddled with child support when it was the woman who caused the divorce.

It makes one think, in staying on topic, what the percentages are in Asian women/foreign male marriages that fail, but this is probably a subject for another thread.

 

[Chidoriashi]

On Family Guy once (I know), Lois said something like, feminism is about choice. and she chose to be a housewife and mother. And I think that is really true. Feminism= independent successful career women is a false assumption. As is to say that a housewife is weak, or a male subservient slave who needs to be liberated.

 

[kusojiji]

He seems to hold a grudge against reasonings. Its usually assertions I see from him.

Let's see, we've had:

-a guy afraid of women who are adults with an actual personality

-a guy "disgusted" by inter-racial relationships

-a guy who thinks all marriage is a scam and a fraud

-a guy who thinks Japanese people are such a distant species that they cannot experience life like everyone else

-a guy who is offended by the notion that people find attractive people more attractive than less attractive people

to name but a few.


Yeah, all those are such reasonable positions that they should be respected and carefully considered.



...come on now...

 

[JuiceBox]

I just think it's funny how a preference for a certain race etc. suddenly gets molded into a fetish by some people. Fetish in this sense carries a really negative connotation that I personally find offensive. For instance, I see the fetish term thrown around a lot when it comes to a non-Asian male who tends to be attracted to an Asian female. However, I don't think it's applied as often to other mixed-race attractions and I'm not entirely sure why.

I've had crushes on countless females of various races, but I seem to have dated mostly Asians as well. I can not explain why this happens.

Haha by the way, this thread kinda reminded me of this group I saw on Facebook a while back. The forum isn't allowing me to post the link but it's called 'Concerned Citizens Against Asian Girls Dating Fat Ugly White People'. Should check it out.

 

[kusojiji]

How about you start off telling us about which kind of women you prefer?

I don't consider women as a 'product' to acquire, demanding that the object be the exact model I demand. I take humans as individuals.

 

[Haruspex]

I don't consider women as a 'product' to acquire, demanding that the object be the exact model I demand. I take humans as individuals.

Yeah, but you must, for a certainty, have a few traits you say "No!" to.

 

[kusojiji]

I don't interact with traits, I interact with people.

 

[-Rudel-]

I want to point out that Remixer appears to be in Dubai, where the culture is greatly different that ours in America.

Remixer, if you grew up in Dubai, or are Muslim then I totally see your point in women very clearly. I hope the others do too.

 

[Remixer]

Hey there Rudel,

yes, I am indeed a muslim. However, that has nothing to do with my preference in women, especially since I used to be an atheist and am a very bad muslim anyway.

For your information, I didn't grow up in Dubai, I just live here. I grew up in Germany, Iran and Australia (yes, this is the chronological order), with the least amount of time spent living in Iran.

Cheers



Remixer

 

[Ashikaga]

I am locking this thread. Some of us have different opinions as to what the point of this thread is, but I think we can all agree that it is not exchanging insults.

I will be reviewing all the posts and deleting those that include what I find to include inappropriate remarks. I thank you in advance for your understanding should some of your posts go poof as they become irelevant after the clean up.