Ignorance to bisexuality

[Nuala]

Oh joy, today I was turned on by this guy on a game I play. Why is this shocking to me? I thought I was heterosexual, and it seems I was wrong. It shouldn't really impact my life that much, but in America it probably will. People will treat you different, and that sort of thing. I'm sure there are members that have gone through this ordeal..
Can any of you lend a helping hand?

 

[Damicci]

Why Care? In todays society most sexual preferences are pretty much accepted unless we are talking inter-species *shutters* then I wouldn't worry about it too much. I don't know any bi-sexual males but as far as women I know one girl and of course most guys enjoy that. I know one lady who wa smarried to a guy that was bi-curious and they divorced and funny thing is she started to date women and he started to date men. Heh go figure. My point is they were never haggled or ridiculed for thier decision. Go with your heart.

 

[Nuala]

I already am going with my heart, I love the guy, and he loves me too. I don't know how to tell my wonderful family, who have discussed their hate of homosexuality/bisexuality with each other.
I don't wish to be disowned, and hated by my family...

 

[Damicci]

It's very touchy subject with families. The worst is not knowing whether you will be truly accepted or not. Only thing you can do is talk to them now rather than waiting until the last minute. This will give them time to deal with any issues they may have with your situation. Unless your family is really messed up like bad b rated movie messed up. Just have an out and out with them. And be sure to get everything off your chest the first time around.

 

[Ma Cherie]

You know, this sort of thing can happen. I really don't know why something like that can happen. From what I've learned people who've feel they've been hurt by the opposite sex so much, they turn to their own gender. Or this can happen if you have a strong admiration and respect for someone of the same gender. It's possible to develop feelings for them. Besides Thor, you've surprised me. Most people (especially guys) get scared if they have a homo erotic dream. They suddenly think they're gay or bisexaul. But it's one of things that can happen. Yes, I know I'm off the subject. :sorry:

 

[Nuala]

You know, this sort of thing can happen. I really don't know why something like that can happen. From what I've learned people who've feel they've been hurt by the opposite sex so much, they turn to their own gender. Or this can happen if you have a strong admiration and respect for someone of the same gender. It's possible to develop feelings for them. Besides Thor, you've surprised me. Most people (especially guys) get scared if they have a homo erotic dream. They suddenly think they're gay or bisexaul. But it's one of things that can happen. Yes, I know I'm off the subject. :sorry:

I found that very interesting, and it wasn't off subject at all. =)

 

[Mike Cash]

Best of luck to you in this, Thor. My only advice would be to point out that it isn't important that everybody in the world be privy to your private business....and that includes family. If I were you I'd wait until I were at least of an age to move out on my own before broaching this with your family. Not that I think you should have to move out when they become aware of this, or that I think they will throw you out, but just in case their being forced to deal with this results in a situation that makes continuing to live with them unbearable to you, you will be in a position to exercise the option of living under a different roof.

 

[alexriversan]

Oh joy, today I was turned on by this guy on a game I play. Why is this shocking to me? I thought I was heterosexual, and it seems I was wrong. It shouldn't really impact my life that much, but in America it probably will. People will treat you different, and that sort of thing. I'm sure there are members that have gone through this ordeal..
Can any of you lend a helping hand?

to take a look at the girl's side- this helps. and, they discuss guys freely, while being together. nothing wrong with it- they just do it.

to turn it around, you can fight with a girl as well...you do not have to kiss your girlfriend/hold hands all the time...

 

[Anchyyy]

I already am going with my heart, I love the guy, and he loves me too. I don't know how to tell my wonderful family, who have discussed their hate of homosexuality/bisexuality with each other.
I don't wish to be disowned, and hated by my family...

Your family really seems to like just 'normal' relationships. You should talk to them as soon as posiblle and try to explain what that guy means to you. Maybe they won't exept that now, but i think they will, when they will see that you are totally happy with him. Just try to be patient and try not fight with them. I wish you good luck in the coversation with them!

 

[alexriversan]

Your family really seems to like just 'normal' relationships. You should talk to them as soon as posiblle and try to explain what that guy means to you. Maybe they won't exept that now, but i think they will, when they will see that you are totally happy with him. Just try to be patient and try not fight with them. I wish you good luck in the coversation with them!

i read, families are not always supportive...

 

[Anchyyy]

i read, families are not always supportive...

I know. But real love is the strongest thing here...

 

[Nuala]

I know. But real love is the strongest thing here...

Hehe, I wish that were true for everywhere in the world. Some familys want their son/daughter to be the posterboy image of the average american family. For some ****** up reason, two men loving each other does not portray that image good enough. I told my family, and they are pissed at me. Not speaking to me...that sort of thing ☝

 

[Pachipro]

I think you should've taken Mike Cash's advice and not said anything. Especially at your age. Maybe it's just a curious thing to you at the moment and you're not sure where you stand. Maybe you'll find out after you experience it that you're not as interested in it as much as you thought and go on with a hetero lifestyle. Or maybe you just want to explore the feminine side of your personality. Whether we like it or not, we all have both a feminine and a male aspect to our personality. To some, it's right in the middle, to others the male side may be more stronger, and still to others, the female side may be just a little more stronger. To deny yourself the exploration, if that is what interests you, is to deny yourself life experiences.

That's the problem with this country today. The Christian Right refuses to tolerate anything outside what "they" consider to be the norm. Ours is a severely homophobic society. Me, I say to each his/her own. If two persons of the same gender love each other, more power to them. It is not up to us to pass judgement.

The Christian Right preaches that it is against the laws of God and the Bible. Well how do you explain the recent fiasco with the Catholic priests and young teenage boys? I guess they are all going to suffer in hell. I was always taught that God doesn't make any mistakes and He doesn't make any junk. Therefore, if He made one person that was more interested in a member of his/her gender than one of the opposite sex, well I guess he made a mistake. If he made a mistake, then, He must not be God as God is supposed to be perfect right? Explain that!

 

[Anchyyy]

Hehe, I wish that were true for everywhere in the world. Some familys want their son/daughter to be the posterboy image of the average american family. For some ****** up reason, two men loving each other does not portray that image good enough. I told my family, and they are pissed at me. Not speaking to me...that sort of thing ☝

They should go used to it...or i am coming there Lol. Give them some time to think about it. They will hopefully understand you when they get how you feel Just don't loose hope ok?

 

[alexriversan]

I think you should...

dont see why you introduce "think" "deny" "homophobic" "judgement" "christian" "god" "catholic" "priest" "junk" "suffer" "hell".

if you knew how the subconscious mind works...

if you look at girls, they "need" to share time- (with each other)

christian right should not even tolerate- it just does not apply. and, why do you refer to "feminine side"- i see, you are older- people always used to fight, nothing feminine with it. and, not called "love".

probably this helps:

boy/girl: love. boy/boy: friendship. why always complicated.

however, i am homophob too- i guess there are very few such people.

sorry if my "advice" not required- just this referal to christianity/keeping quit appears as bad to me...

and sorry for bandwagoning.

(now i read the complicate sentence pachipro made- all to say "god=man made image". and, this occurs as justification)

 

[Pachipro]

sorry if my "advice" not required- just this referal to christianity/keeping quit appears as bad to me...

and sorry for bandwagoning.

No need to apologize here alex. All opinions are welcome as long as they are kept civil. I just find too many contradictions with what we are told to believe and what is actually going on in this world of ours. I was raised a Roman Catholic for the first 17 years of my life. Getting away from my family and home town and exploring the world and visiting and living in places like Japan helped me see that all is not what I was taught it should be. I was able to expand my horizons and experience new cultures and thinking. Soon I began to notice the contradictions and began to have second thoughts.

Had I never ventured from my place of birth, I may still have the negatives I was taught, that any religion other than Christian was bad, homosexuals are bad, black people are bad, Japanese, Chinese, German, Jewish people, etc. are bad. "White man good! Others bad!" This is what I was taught and the way I was brought up during my early years. Remember, intolerance of others is never inherited. It is taught!

After I left home, I began to think for myself based on my own experiences and developed my own philosophy of life based on these experiences and not what someone tells me it should be. I completely shunned organized religion as, in my opinion, organized religion, whether it be Jewish, Catholic, Baptist, Protestant, Lutheran, Islam, etc. is nothing but brainwashing a person to a particular way of thinking and I, for one, am not going to succumb to that.

You may be a homophobe, as you said, but that's the way you were indoctrinated and you were taught to think that way. I don't fault YOU for that, only the system itself.

This is not a thread on religion, but do you actually believe that Jesus Christ Himself will deny a bisexual, his "child", entry to the kingdom of God, as the Bible teaches, because he/she loves a person of the same sex? Even though that person loved and accepted Jesus Christ as his Lord and Savior and lived his/her life according to the Christian teachings? If that is the type of vengeful/hateful/spiteful person(IMO) He is, then I don't want any part of his so called kingdom, as he is lying to me when he preaches about "UNCONDITIONAL LOVE" for his "children" and mankind in general.

To me there is absolutely nothing wrong with bisexuality/homosexuality if that is what the individual so desires. It is only what we are taught to think about it that is wrong in my opinion as, again, I repeat, God doesn't make any mistakes.

 

[Ma Cherie]

You know, it's interesting whenever I hear people say that when the grew with a certain religion, a religion has taught them that homosexuals are "bad". But I guess I was fortunate enough to come from a christian family that didn't teach that. I was taught that homosexuality was a "sin" but I was also taught that it's the people who are bad, it's the homosexuality that is. That's why I believe I'm tolarant of homosexuals. I was never taught that homosexuals were "bad". Just the act of it.

Well, I'll shut up now.

 

[Pachipro]

You know, it's interesting whenever I hear people say that when the grew with a certain religion, a religion has taught them that homosexuals are "bad". But I guess I was fortunate enough to come from a christian family that didn't teach that. I was taught that homosexuality was a "sin" but I was also taught that it's the people who are bad, it's the homosexuality that is. That's why I believe I'm tolarant of homosexuals. I was never taught that homosexuals were "bad". Just the act of it.

Well, I'll shut up now.

Please don't "shut up." I throughly enjoy hearing the opinions of others as I can understand all sides of an argument. It still seems an oxymoron to me that if we are taught that the act of homosexuality/bisexuality is bad and the person not, then why teach the "unconditional love" of Jesus? It just doesn't make any sense to me. Maybe I am missing something here. I don't know. I still believe that the majority of people that prefer those of their same gender were born that way. It is in their genetic make-up. To then condemn the act itself for the way God made them is beyond my thinking as, again I say, I was taught that God doesn't make any mistakes.

 

[Ma Cherie]

Hey, I understand what you mean Pachipro. It's such a complex issue, and I think over the years, religion has been twisted so much. It's been misused by mankind.

 

[Duo]

You know, it's interesting whenever I hear people say that when the grew with a certain religion, a religion has taught them that homosexuals are "bad". But I guess I was fortunate enough to come from a christian family that didn't teach that. I was taught that homosexuality was a "sin" but I was also taught that it's the people who are bad, it's the homosexuality that is. That's why I believe I'm tolarant of homosexuals. I was never taught that homosexuals were "bad". Just the act of it.

Well, I'll shut up now.

Wait, you were taught that the act of homosexuality is bad, but not the people........ ☝

But just by the inherited fact that being a homosexual requires that one engages in homosexual acts. I mean homosexuals are homosexuals becasue they engage in sexual acts with the same sex,,,,, you can't be a homosexual by doing nuttin or remaining celibate. Soooooooo. that's just saying like oh homosexuals are just people but when they do it they are bad,that's like basically disguising the disaproval and what not.

 

[Ma Cherie]

Yeah, I guess so Duo. But I really didn't want to say that being a homosexaul is a sin. Because I really didn't want to offend anyone. :sorry: But what I really meant from what I have been taught, that even though it is a sin, we shouldn't hate them for it. Then again, it's almost like saying we should dislike the fact that they are homosexual. ☝

I'm confused now. I'm only telling what I've been taught. It's complicated.

 

[Duo]

Oh no by no means im not tryin to say ur wrong or bad or anything, I was just tryin to undertand because that teaching seems a bit contradictory

 

[Ma Cherie]

Oh no by no means im not tryin to say ur wrong or bad or anything, I was just tryin to undertand because that teaching seems a bit contradictory

Yes, I know. But I just wanted to point how I know some priest teach people that homosexuals are out and out are bad.

 

[mynimal]

I'm bisexual, but I'm very lucky to have a good family like mine. They support bisexuals and homosexuals, and disagree with people who hate them. I haven't told them, and don't plan to. At least until my [christian] sister gets a life and moves out.

 

[Duo]

Yes, this actually the official catholic line i beleive, wellll, i don't know much about it, i'm very far from religion so.......