This is a mobile optimized page that loads fast, if you want to load the real page, click this text.

Getting Japanese friends in Japan

Benoist

先輩
Joined
8 Mar 2007
Messages
20
Reaction score
0
Do you have any Japanese friends? How do you get Japanese friends? Let's say your Japanese is pretty good and you can communicate with Japanese people. How does the Japanese act when it comes to being friends with a foreigner? Anyone got some experience to share?

I mean friends who you can call anytime to do whatever you like with. Not someone who you just want to practice your Japanese with, but someone who will gladly invite you to their home, travel together, hang out with, or whatever you do with your native friends. And not someone you just find at a bar and drink with that night, and then it's good bye.

I know there's JREF Friends, but I don't like Internet match-making.

Please, I need help!
 
Before everyone jumps on you, I should warn you that these kinds of questions don't appear to fare well here. The reason for that is because you've already made a critical error in assuming all Japanese people are the same, and there's some magic formula for how to meet any Japanese person under any circumstance.

But, having said that, GENERALLY speaking, its the same as any other part of the world. If you meet someone who takes a liking to you, kindly ask if they'd care to meet again and follow up politely. Over time the person may become your friend. Just keep in mind that the Japanese frequently (especially over drinks) exchange contact information and business cards out of politeness, but really never intend to contact the other person. If someone gives you an e-mail or phone number and it seems as though despite this fact, they do not wish to meet up again, don't get offended. In actual fact you may have made the mistake in assuming they wanted to meet up again in the first place, its a cultural difference between the West and Japan. In the West people exchange contact information with the sole intention of contacting one another again. In Japan its a bit of a formality which carries less social onus.

Furthremore, making good friends who will as you say invite you back to their homes and travel together and whatnot, well.. generally the home is not a place for entertaining, for receiving guests too frequently. The Japanese home is a private place for close friends and family mostly I'd say.. generally socialization, entertaining and whatnot is carried on in any of the limitless numer of bars, izakayas, restaurants, etc., where one can drink, relax and be a little noisy. This is where your new friend will most likely wish to meet until they get to know you better. This is also for the purpose of noise reduction as Japanese homes (especially apartments) are densely situated.

So yeah, try not to assume there is a secret part of Japanese society out there that loves foreigners and just can't wait to bring one home, and all you have to do is find the secret handshake. It doesn't exist. Making friends in Japan is the same as in any other place..you have to be polite and patient. There's no magic formula and even if you find someone cool, from my experience the Japanese are very busy and sort of 'slot you in' to their schedules where they can. Don't get frustrated if they're always busy and can only meet for a couple of hours a week.

If you want true cultural exchange try finding some local programs or groups at your ward center, or keep an eye out in the Metropolis magazine for individuals wanting language exchange and also a calendar of events if you're located in an urban center.
 
internet cafe's,mostly the gaming types.
-play games wit people around,
-ask 2 join a game etc
- will b fun
-pretty sure there pretty big in japan

or if ur not da pc/gamer or not ur thing/ more older
bars/clubs etc
 
How about meeting people with common interests?
If you play any musical instrument, join the local brassband or orchestra, for instance. I believe that if you visit the ward office ツ(窶ケテヲ窶禿ーツ焦?ツ), you can find various communities, clubs, or circles.
If you speak Japanese fluently, that would help, too.
 
Cookies are required to use this site. You must accept them to continue using the site. Learn more…