Japanese Male Image, nature, and traditional belief about Japanese male role

[Orca]

Hi all,

There are so many opinions about Japanese women.
However it is rare to discuss about Japanese male natures based on the history, culture and traditional belief.

I am curious about the public opinions about Japanese men.

Could you share your opinion about their image and nature?

From information i got from my friends (majorly influenced by chinese culture), it was said that most of them are dictators in nature.

So if the husband says Drink Beer, the wife should drink beer.
If the husband says Kill Ants, the wife should kill ants.

Is it true?
I got so many different information from different people.
Chinese said, Japanese male is so bad, even much worse than chinese. They are dictators in nature. However I found many chinese guys, are also the same, they are not dictators however they are manipulative. They often want to take for granted, or take advantage on women, especially in difficult condition.

On the other hand, my friend told me, that her Japanese friends, said it might be depending on the persons. And those kind of patriarchal male japanese system, were adopted long time ago, up to 1980's something.

I got some Japanese female acquaitances, and from their stories, the Japanese male are not that way now. Even my Japanese male friend, is very kind and a gentleman. My female Japanese friends, also are not gentle or obedience, like it is always said in many articles.
Instead they are rebellious, stubborn, tomboy, independent also.

However their image seems so badly deteriorated by that dictatorship in female and male relationship.
Obedience, rigid, weak and many things .

Thank u very much

 

[Glenski]

Go with the friends' advice that it all depends.

Are we talking about politicians? The average husband salariman in his 50s? A farmer? The boys from the music group Arashi? (yuk) I'm sure if you were asked about the image of men in your own country, you'd have a hard time giving an average description.

 

[Orca]

Go with the friends' advice that it all depends.

Are we talking about politicians? The average husband salariman in his 50s? A farmer? The boys from the music group Arashi? (yuk) I'm sure if you were asked about the image of men in your own country, you'd have a hard time giving an average description.

It is not a hard time for me. I just need to type, that s all.

MIght be for you it is hard to give description thats why u are saying different things.
I understand that u are as the gaijin, only could insult and make a divide et impera, like u always did in colonialism era.
If u don't understand, don't need insult... better go back to ur gaijin country, and make a war there..

 

[Chidoriashi]

It is not a hard time for me. I just need to type, that s all.
MIght be for you it is hard to give description thats why u are saying different things.
I understand that u are as the gaijin, only could insult and make a divide et impera, like u always did in colonialism era.
If u don't understand, don't need insult... better go back to ur gaijin country, and make a war there..

Glenski gave you an honest answer and was not trying to be insulting at all from what I can tell. You on the other hand are being a total a$$. I suggest you go back to your country and open up an English textbook.

 

[Glenski]

I am sorry, but I wasn't here during the colonialism era.

"Different things"? You got me there. What the heck are you talking about?

As for telling me to leave, that's a very interesting perspective.

I can see you just didn't understand the least bit about what I wrote. Are all people from your country like that? (sarcastic note related to stereotypes...)

 

[Sylvor]

Wow, there are a lot of nice people on this forum

 

[Jerry Cullins]

Strangely enough I would say the vast majority of my male friends in Japan would fall under the definition of henpecked. And god help them if they piss off their wives at home.
Now my Chinese friends, their wives are always well behaved and docile. They might have a black eye or two but that's just Chinese culture, right?

 

[Ichigokun]

Japanese males are not as friendly and welcoming, especially those above 40. The other time I visited my Japanese friend, his mother drove one and a half hours from Yamaga City to Kumamoto in Kyushu to visit me in the hotel. Only my friend's mother and siblings came. His father was, well, lazing at home? Lol.

 

[Mike Cash]

Japanese males are not as friendly and welcoming, especially those above 40. The other time I visited my Japanese friend, his mother drove one and a half hours from Yamaga City to Kumamoto in Kyushu to visit me in the hotel. Only my friend's mother and siblings came. His father was, well, lazing at home? Lol.

You feel comfortable stereotyping Japanese men over 40 as unfriendly and unwelcoming because ONE GUY didn't consider meeting some kid worth three hours in a car on his day off? What's so special about you that a grown man has to give up his day off to go receive the honor of hanging out in your hotel room? Was there some reason you couldn't go to visit the family instead of taking it for granted that an entire family should travel to visit you?

Maybe he's telling people he knows that young people from your country are inconsiderate and self-centered.

Maybe, like so many men in Japan, he works six days a damned week. Who the hell are you to laughingly dismiss as unfriendly unwelcoming LAZING when a grown man who doesn't know you isn't thrilled by the prospect of the sublime joy of making your acquaintance.

He worked to put the clothes on the backs of those who did come, paid for the car that took them, and got stuck paying for the gas they burned. And because you weren't his first choice of how to spend his day off you malign millions of Japanese men as unfriendly and unwelcoming? Well just who the hell do you think you are?

 

[Ichigokun]

It's 1.5 hours, not three. And why the hell are you stalking me like, whatever I comment, after that you walk in and type a series of things.
Anyway, I didn't say unfriendly and unwelcoming. I said NOT AS. NOT AS is not equivalent to UNFRIENDLY and UNWELCOMING.

Not as just means not up to that degree, slightly lower.

UN- means totally NOT.

---------- Post added at 18:17 ---------- Previous post was at 18:15 ----------

And btw, it was a weekend so he doesn't have to work.

 

[Mike Cash]

Driving 1.5 hours to visit you involves driving 1.5 hours to go home.

Yes, I got that it was the weekend. Why should he give up his day off to spend it with you? Why should that be the basis for stereotyping Japanese men over 40?

This is an online forum. If you don't want your statements responded to, post them on a blog and disable comments.

 

[FrustratedDave]

It is not a hard time for me. I just need to type, that s all.
MIght be for you it is hard to give description thats why u are saying different things.
I understand that u are as the gaijin, only could insult and make a divide et impera, like u always did in colonialism era.
If u don't understand, don't need insult... better go back to ur gaijin country, and make a war there..

Your X-rays came Orca.....

 

[keiare]

Hi.

I'm US born, and currently living in the US. I have several Japanese friends, all in their 20s, so I can only speak as to my encounters with those Men.

These men are from all over Japan, except for Okinawa .

The situation is that

7 of 7 are so polite that even when they have been pissed at me or I have offended them, they don't tell me, and I have to find out from one of our mutual friends. And when I confront them I usually get a "nevermind" (which is different from the US "nevermind").

2 of 7 have girlfriends back in Japan and are ridiculously devoted to them, but do not like to talk about relationships, because they are private.

1 of 7 wants to have the traditional "shuhu" style house-wife. The other 6 "expect" they will get married sometime after college.

1 of 7 prefers "Western girls"

2 of 7 prefer "Korean girls"

2 of 7 prefers "guys" (but expects he will marry a woman)

2 of 7 would date other girls, but prefer Japanese



Other than that, they are hilarious, kind, playful and have treated me much better than any American Guy I have ever met, including my husband.

I hope it is helpful.

If this isn't the age range you are looking for, then I don't know

<3 Kei