The English Lesson Bum

[Chidoriashi]

Been meaning to post this topic for a while just have not got around to it.

Let me start with a little story. So my co-worker and I were on a business trip and riding the trains. I had some things I needed to look over for the day so I got my stuff out and started working. About this time, a somewhat strange looking older Japanese guy with a real bad toupee sits down across from us and awkwardly says "Hello". And I'm like, oh boy here we go...(We are obviously foreigners by the way... well at least I am.) Despite being dressed in business attire, he asks us if we are sightseeing. I say "No, we are working". Now I really had some things that I needed to work on so I did my best to ignore the guy. But, my coworker, being the kind soul that she is, made the mistake of talking back to him a little.

Now the guy had not incomprehensible English, you know, like if I tried to I could understand him, but it was annoying to listen to, especially when I did not want to listen to it. So since my co-worker made the mistake of being polite and so as not to be a total jerk-off, I tried somewhat nod and say a few things as if I was listening. My co-worker soon realized her mistake though tried to stop the conversation, but the guy just kept on talking. So for the next half hour I found myself trying to do my work and not tell this guy to F-off, but give him a hint that I was busy. He eventually got the drift and kind of walked off apologetically, but the whole incident was just a big bother. Despite this though, I still felt kind of bad.

Now had this been any other time, or had we been actually sightseeing I might not have minded putting up with him. But the fact is we were working and he knew it! But still decided to impose himself on us. So the part of me that was annoyed just told the part of me that felt bad that the guy was rude and in the wrong to bother us in the first place.

So now I want to know, how does everyone else who has been in this situation react? Or what do you think about people doing this in general? If you have never experienced it, would you talk to them? I used to politely oblige until, it started to seem like half of them were piss drunk all the time and incomprehensible in Japanese, and English.

And to our Japanese posters, how do you feel when you witness someone doing this to English speaking foreigners?

 

[Glenski]

Pieces of this thread, perhaps pages 2-4 apply to your question.
Job Discussion Forums :: View topic - Those who don't/won't learn Japanese

If he's bothering you, just tell him more forcefully, "Excuse me, but I really have to finish THIS report right here! I'm sure you can understand. Sorry."

Language leeches are horrid creatures. Most of them don't even know how rude they are.

 

[Ashikaga]

....And to our Japanese posters, how do you feel when you witness someone doing this to English speaking foreigners?

I might feel bad for you if you looked really annoyed, as well as feel embarrased for him for his cluelessness... but we deal with clueless, annoying people everyday, I would not put this into a special category.

Was this person drunk or was he just an English learner who was eager to talk to a native speaker?

 

[Chidoriashi]

Ashikaga> Well it was in the morning.. so I hope he had not been drinking. He was basically just some guy scouting for foreigners to start conversations with. At least that was my impression since there were not many people on the train and he spotted us from a long ways away, and made an effort to sit right across from us. In any case the issue is pretty much resolved for me. Most of the time I am sociable and nice to the people that start conversations with me (they are in Japanese most of the time though), but next time when I am busy, I'm just gonna have to be more forceful. Anyhow, I was just curious to hear about other peoples encounters and thoughts on the phenomenon.

Glenski> Thanks for the link.

 

[ShadowSpirit]

I deal with this situation quite often. Not on the basis of someone attempting to practice their English with me, but people wanting to talk to ask me about my military background and share their like minded stories (if you're reading this Uncle Frank, please don't take any offense. I enjoy our talks.)

The thing is I'm a walking poster board for a service member. The haircut, the way I talk, the manner in which I conduct myself; I stand out. I don't mind when I'm by myself and not in a hurry. Yet this usually happens when I'm involved in a deep conversation with a friend, then I get interrupted with. "Excuse me, are you in the military?" Then that person tries to dominate for conversation with me. I do find it very rude. I appreciate the enthusiasm, and understand the excitement to share knowledge of the topic, but please not at the cost of what I was already involving myself into. The worst time was when I went on a date to a Japanese restaurant, was seated at the table with the other guests, and then the couple who sat on the other side of my date ended up both being military. They struck up a conversation with me right away and kept talking to me through the entire dinner almost non-stop. I didn't even know how to react. I mean, do I cut them off and have an uncomfortable dinner with my date? In retrospect, I should had cut them off, at least despite the outcome it would have been the right thing to do while in her company. Instead I just kept trying to ignore the couple and just talk to my date. With the couple constantly asking me a question, me pretending like I didn't hear it, so they would repeat it until I responded.

Sorry, not sure I helped out any on answering for how to deal with it. More like your thread struck a nerve and I had to vent on the topic. Very therapeutic though, thanks.

 

[Glenski]

Shadow,
You politely and as discreetly as possible tell your date that you would rather move to a place where the two of you won't be interrupted (glance at the disturbing neighbors...). Then, pay the bill and find a new restaurant. She should catch on that you are a bit more serious than you were while gabbing with the Watanabe's next door.

 

[ShadowSpirit]

Shadow,
You politely and as discreetly as possible tell your date that you would rather move to a place where the two of you won't be interrupted (glance at the disturbing neighbors...). Then, pay the bill and find a new restaurant. She should catch on that you are a bit more serious than you were while gabbing with the Watanabe's next door.

That is sound advice you're giving me. Problem with my unique prediciment, is that we were locked into that seating arrangement and venue. It was one of those places where you wait to be seated until they can fill up a table, take your order in advance, and then the chef comes out with the requested meals to prepare for cooking. Otherwise I would had gladly have relocated to a different location. I did however whisper to her that the people were getting on my nerves and she agreed with me.

The rest of the date that evening went smooth however in case if anybody was a tad bit concerned.