Strange sentence

[Gaijinian]

I found this sentence. I'm not sure if it is natural Japanese or not, but it sounds very strange to me:
チケットのこの部分は、旅行終了後も大切に保管しておいて下さい。
Am I right in thinking that it sounds strange? The English said something like, "Keep this portion of the ticket as proof of your journey," or something...

 

[Glenn]

It looks fine to me. Why do you find it strange (or can you even point to anything specific)?

 

[Mike Cash]

Looks fine-n-dandy to me too. BIANANS.

 

[cheapshot]

/signed

seems ok to me too.

which sections seems to be "strange" to you?

 

[Glenn]

Yeah... reading over my post it looks like it could be taken as harsh or condescending, when I didn't mean it to be. I just meant that sometimes we can't really pinpoint why we think something is the way it is, we just have the feeling that it is that way. So, sorry if I offended.

 

[Gaijinian]

The 切符のこの部分は part seemed odd to me, plus, why did they use しておいて? I thought していって might be better. But hey, that is why I'm no 翻訳者.

By the way, Glenn-san, don't worry, your post was in no way condescending.

 

[undrentide]

The 切符のこの部分は part seemed odd to me, plus, why did they use しておいて? I thought していって might be better. But hey, that is why I'm no 翻訳者.

I see what you are feeling strange about now.

The particle は has several functions - normally it is used to indicate the topic of the sentence, but in this case, it is used to pick up something from others.
It is possible to replace it with を, but the meaning will be slightly different.

チケットのこの部分を : just focusing on この部分 as the object (for the verb 保管しておく）
チケットのこの部分は : you may discard the other part of the ticket, but this particular part of the ticket needs to be kept.

～しておく： おく = 置く means to keep something in some status, position, etc.
～していく: いく = 行く thus this implies you do something and leave it. It does not fit the situation, as you are supposed to keep a part of the ticket, not leave it behind.

 

[jonny-mt]

Well, undrentide said it best, but I just wanted to add something to his/her explanation of ～ておく. Since this is a construct used to indicate that you are doing something ahead of time, 保管しておく has the feeling that you are not only keeping that part of the ticket, but in fact keeping it in preparation for something else that is yet to come. In other words, there's sort of a "just-in-case" feeling behind it. I personally would be more inclined to keep something that said 保管しておいてください rather than something that simply said 保管してください--the latter seems to me that they are just asking because they're supposed to, while the former makes it seem that there is some reasoning behind their request.

 

[Mike Cash]

At the risk of pointing out the obvious.....

Remember that the この部分 also indicates that there was some physical action such as pointing at some portion of the ticket.

 

[Gaijinian]

皆さん、説明してくれてありがとうございます。初めて読んだら不自然な日本語だと思っていたのに、皆さんのいい説明のおかげで今読んでみると、なぜそう思ったのか、わからなくなりました。

初めて読んだときに、なぜおかしいと思ったかというと、実はわからなかったんですが、妙におかしく聞こえて・・・。でも今ならok！

ありがとう～

やっぱり、私の日本語を改善しないとねｗ 頑張りますｗ