Jlist adult oriented contest - If "adult oriented" pervs you out, don't read ><

[Mal]

Jlist and www.somethingawful.com are running a contest for various prizes.

Most of them ... um... naughty in nature. Well, not all of them, but the grand prize is a hentai delight par excellance. Anyway, I thought this was pretty funny so I passed it on here.

Unfortunately it seems the winner must be in the US or Canada.

Anyway, here are the rules (you can see these on www.somethingawful.com too, with links if you are actually interested in entering):

With prizes like those I'm sure you're all eager to know how you can enter our exciting contest. It's easy! You send your name to Zack Parsons with the subject line CONTEST ENTRY and you include your contest entry either as a link or as an attachment. But wait, what is your contest entry? You have three options!

ENTRY OPTION #1: Readers of Something Awful should be familiar with the various OS-tans; anime girls representing computer operating systems. Recently a mean bad ALoD recipient decided to create a Something Awful-tan and drew a comic about her getting punched in the stomach and vomiting. That just won't stand! As your entry for the art category create a Something Awful tan, either for the entire site of Something Awful or for one of the sections like the ROM Pit or Photoshop Phriday. Bonus points will be awarded if she is pictured abusing the man in the ALoD comic. This can be animated if you choose.

ENTRY OPTION #2: Write a poem, sing a song, draw a picture, or animate a cartoon about Robocop working as a new on-the-scene reporter for CNN and having a deep and hostile rivalry with Anderson Cooper.

ENTRY OPTION #3: Come up with an advertisement for a fictitious J-List product using your art skills and tools such as Photoshop, pens, and ephedrine.

Linked files are preferred, attached files are accepted, and archived (ZIP, RAR, etc.) files are strictly forbidden! We do not trust your compressed secrets! All entries must be received by midnight Eastern Time on April 4th! Winners will be announced on April 8th! Sorry Europe and Australia, this contest is for people in the United States and Canada only! Must be 18 or over to win because of the scandalous nature of some of the prizes!
I look forward to your submissions and I will be reminding you until you hate me utterly about this contest! I may have to use fewer exclamation marks because I am pretty sure I used up our entire inventory on this update.

Here is the grand prize complete with scandalous descriptions:

GRAND PRIZE!!!!!!!
The ultimate prize package from J-List that includes:

Looking for a Japanese Girlfriend T-shirt - A great conversation starter in police holding cells!

Inflatable Japanese "Hug Pillow" (aka Dutch Wife) - A pillow you can stick your penis into! Great for kids and pets!

Little My Maid - How often have you been at work and suddenly wanted to rape a cartoon alien? This prize makes your dreams come true!

Zenra Ballet II DVD - Nominated for three academy awards including "best performance from a ballerina with semen on her face!"

Domo-Kun Samurai Version (Shinsengumi) - The perfect centerpiece for your next FARK party!

Ai in a Cup (Ai Nagase) - A whole new way to bring shame to your ancestors!

The rest of the prizes are just as humorous, and also quite a bit less pervered. Infact the third place prize is kind of cute.

 

[PopCulturePooka]

Looking for a Japanese Girlfriend T-shirt

Haha is anyone pathetic/sad enough to wear one of these?

 

[RockLee]

Inflatable Japanese "Hug Pillow" (aka Dutch Wife) - A pillow you can stick your penis into! Great for kids and pets!

HAHAHA...kids & pets !!! omfg

Zenra Ballet II DVD - Nominated for three academy awards including "best performance from a ballerina with semen on her face!"

Yeah that zenra stuff is quite....well u get the picture !

 

[TwistedMac]

Haha is anyone pathetic/sad enough to wear one of these?

I've... I've got one of those >_< (not kidding)

It's funny!

Also, there are no japanese people what so ever around where I live... which makes it all the more funny.

looks pretty spiffy too.

 

[SkippyDaStudent85]

See, I would wear one of those shirts because of this joke between my pen-pal and I.

Also, like Mac said: "It's funny!"

 

[Davey]

I come to Jlist sometimes, they got some good things.s. and baka things yeah.... i most say before i had an idea of wearing a t-shirt with kanji on it that says : japanse girls are cute, i want one.....

but after getting a j-girl myself... i think, its not nessacery anymore...

 

[kirei_na_me]

Haha is anyone pathetic/sad enough to wear one of these?

Yeah, I know of many who would...

 

[PopCulturePooka]

We just met 2.
Haha jokes guys.

 

[Mal]

We just met 2.
Haha jokes guys.

Be careful or they'll hit you with their "hug pillows" - and you definately know where those have been

 

[SkippyDaStudent85]

*slowly catches on and looks for his hammer-o-doom*

 

[TwistedMac]

"hug" pillows >_<
let's not go there. those things are freaky.

People always ask me what my shirt says.. sometimes I make **** up, other times I say I don't know... it's safer that way

 

[Mal]

"hug" pillows >_<
let's not go there. those things are freaky.

But... but.... Sailor Moon keeps winking at me. She wants it.

Lets hope I remembered to use the fabric softener...

 

[SkippyDaStudent85]

Okay, EEWWWWWWWWWW :eek2:

 

[TwistedMac]

Okay, EEWWWWWWWWWW :eek2:

what? did something gross end up on your hugpillow?

You can get that right out with Club Soda.