Japanese Opinion of Extra-Cultural Relationships

[Charon34]

Hi all, I've been studying the Japanese Culture for a while now. For many years my dream has been to go to Japan and live there. This sort of question is not something I can talk to my Japanese instructors about. I first came into contact with the general expectations that Asians should date other Asian people, when I began dating my current girlfriend a while ago. She's Chinese and I know that some of her family would prefer her to date an Asian through what shes told me about what they say and expect of her. This really made me wonder. So I began digging a little bit and found one article that translated many uncensored postings from Japanese people in response to an incident related to a Japanese girl and her American boyfriend. I saw about half/half reaction. Half understanding and half commenting just about homocultural relationships.
What is the general Japanese opinion of extra-cultural/racial relationships? I'm asking for the truth here and not a sugarcoat....... Thank you all for your time. ^.^

 

[Mike Cash]

Are you the type who would let what some a-hole strangers you don't even know would think about it influence what you do with your life?

If so, then yes, it might be best for you to do what you think others would approve of.

 

[Mikawa Ossan]

Mike's right: what does it matter what other people think if you're doing nothing wrong and you've found happiness?

And remember a good number of Americans aren't exactly thrilled about biracial couples. I know my family wasn't at first, but they turned around when they met my first Japanese girlfriend and fell in love with her.

My younger brother's wife is from Taiwan, and they met in college. Her parents didn't want her dating Americans either, but now we're just one big happy family.

If you care about someone, you can't let other people get between the two of you. It's not their relationship, and it's not their life you're talking about.

 

[Michael Paulson]

People spend way to much time worrying about what others think and that only leads to a unhappy and unfulfilled life. Do what you know is going to make you happy. If dating someone of another race will make you happy, then do it. Anyone that is unable or not willing to accept your relationship is simply not worth any time or effort.

 

[Charon34]

lol. Hey guys, the point of the question wasn't about whether I should go to Japan or that I would let the thoughts of any person besides my own influence my decisions in life. It was about what Japanese people thought about extra-cultural relationships. I'm not worried about what they think, but I'm interested about what they think. Its more of a question about the psychology of Japanese people. Even if a majority of people in Japan DID look down upon it I wouldn't let it stop me, but that doesn't stop me from being curious about their disposition. I was asking for someone who was Japanese themselves or someone who lived there for an extended amount of time to share their experiences with the Japanese people in this regard. From good to bad.

 

[Mikawa Ossan]

lol. Hey guys, the point of the question wasn't about whether I should go to Japan or that I would let the thoughts of any person besides my own influence my decisions in life. It was about what Japanese people thought about extra-cultural relationships. I'm not worried about what they think, but I'm interested about what they think. Its more of a question about the psychology of Japanese people. Even if a majority of people in Japan DID look down upon it I wouldn't let it stop me, but that doesn't stop me from being curious about their disposition. I was asking for someone who was Japanese themselves or someone who lived there for an extended amount of time to share their experiences with the Japanese people in this regard. From good to bad.

That's more or less what you got. I lived in Japan for a number of years, and Mike Cash has lived there much longer than that.
Japanese are people, just like anywhere else. You will find ignorant people as well as open-minded people. You should pay them as much heed as you would anyone else.

 

[Mike Cash]

What I find more interesting is the part about not being able to ask your Japanese instructors.

Why on earth not?

If you can't answer without using any of the following words, I'll know you've watched way too many movies about Japan and would be disappointed with the real thing:

1. Honor
2. Respect
3. Dignity
4. Insult
5. Offend

 

[Charon34]

When I think about it, I do feel silly for not asking my Instructors. In any culture, race can be a touchy subject and I would feel bad to put any of them on the spot with this particular question. I just felt that this forum would be a resource of equal value without having to bug them or make them feel uncomfortable. Maybe I just either need to trust in them more or foster a better relationship with them.