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What is the most annoying thing about living in Japan?



So you mean an American woman did that to you as well. Where in the world do you buy Japanese papers in the states? Also I am glad to see it isn't just foreigners living in Japan that face this annomoly, that American's in the states as well.

So from reading your posts, this isn't just something a foreigner in Japan "feels" but an American in the USA as well. Wow, I wonder what part of the US that you live in that has such a large Japanese population that ride the trains everyday.

Hopefully if I stay here long enough (which I intend to do) I'll reach that tolerance nirvana that you and other long-timer posters seem to have reached ...
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Well I will honestly admit that it took a few years to get over most of it. Then again there are times, depending on my "time of the month" that these things still bug me.

In my opinion much of this "feeling" of being shunned has a direct coorelation to the amount of time that one actually lives here in Japan. Also how the individual adapts to their surroundings, and the environment.
 
No, I just returned and visit quite frequently so the sensible assumption that it took place in the country in this case happens to be correct. Sorry I should have made that more clear. And I feel behavior like that is slightly ridiculous to say the least, particularly in a city like Kanazawa with a very positive atmosphere between natives and foreigners, so the answer was directed at Goldiegirl in particular. If someone wants to stand rather than sit next to a foreigner, Japanese speaker or not, well that is their discomfort and not a problem I take it on myself to solve.
 

Well thank you for clarifying that, but no it is not a "sensible" assumption, it's never safe to assume anything, particularly on a message board like this, as there are many people that write many things about Japan and attempt to come across as if what they "say" is gospel truth, when in fact their experiences are limited to a few weeks or a few months.

Whomever the "answer" was directed towards doesnt matter either, I know that many people, whose experiences here in Japan are limited find many of the peculiarities of the Japanese people and some of their mannerisms and customs to be more than just a little disturbing to say the least.

If someone wants to stand rather than sit next to a foreigner, Japanese speaker or not, well that is their discomfort and not a problem I take it on myself to solve.
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That is and of itself probably the best advice that Goldiegirl should take from this "discussion" Well said.
 
The case of Japanese feeling uncomfortable sitting next to foreigners on trains comes up alot on different forums and in conversation and the foreigner is often perplexed or becomes angry until he/she understands the nature of the action, but one topic I have never seen asked by foreigners living in Japan is, How many times has a foreigner refused to take a seat next to you on a train or bus when they could have easily taken the seat, but didn't? In fact they took another seat away from you when it became available.

It has happened to me. Alot. The reason is probably similar to the "Gaijin Greets" thread

I'll bet for those living long term in Japan, probably no foreigner (or a very few at the most) has ever taken a seat next to you, a fellow gaijin, on a train or bus.

Do those foreigners, who are not sat next to, feel shunned, alianated and exiled? Are they being rude to a fellow foreigner? Are they afraid to sit next to them because they speak only their own language and are afraid that the fellow foreigner may speak to him/her in a language he/she cannot speak? Or do they just don't want to interact with a fellow foreigner/"competitor" out of fear that this foreigner may know more than I?

Well, I don't know the correct answer, but it's the same thing people! And most will never bring this point into the conversation, but they will sure as hell point out this same "flaw" or "rudeness" of the Japanese.

Maybe since you are living in Japan you have never thought about the same actions done to you by fellow foreigners, but the next time you are riding the train or bus take notice and ask yourself if it is rude and if you feel alienated and shunned when a fellow foreigner refuses to take a seat next to you. I think you'll be surprised at the answer.
 
If a foreigner doesn't take a seat next to a fellow gaijin reading a Japanese paper or book out of language insecurity, social embarrasment or fear of the unknown for reasons you have enumerated I would consider the behavior rude but psychologically understandable. When a Japanese person takes a similar action it rude and much less easily explained away by the aforementioned excuses.

It hasn't been a problem I've experienced personally with other whites on trains or buses, though, so these attempts at reasoning it out are more in the nature of thought experiments than personal expressions of being shunned or alienated. And I'm not the least interested in having a gaijin experience in Japan so if that is all they're looking for in a ride, they can sit next to someone else.
 
Abe-toge said:
I'm an early riser, but having the sun come up at 4:30 am doesn't seem to benefit anyone, but the elderly who go to sleep at 8 pm. I'm all for day light saving time so we can make better use of the daylight in the evening.
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The elderly would go to bed later if they played The Lawrence Welk Show re-runs on Japanese television. ;-)
 
did anybody let the japanese people standing that it was ok if they sat down?
or on a crowded bus/train stand up so that the japanese person could sit down? (age is very important)
i know that sometimes it seems that people are consciously being rude, or inconsiderate of foriegners, but i should point out the obvious, cause no one else has.... YOU"RE IN JAPAN!!!

to the woman who did not get free tissues, please do not feel like this is an insult. its just a culture thing. the husband needs to take care of the wife. he needs to be assertive in public. when he gets a tissue, he should give it to you, and then ask for one for himself. addressing another mans wife directly, when she is in her husbands company can be very in-appropriate in many cultures. it is more likely that thier intent was actually to NOT offend you, but its hard. do they treat you like westerners and risk "shunning" you; or do they treat you like japanese and risk a cultural insult? as i've read here, and experienced first hand, some people want to be treated no differently then the natives treat each other. others expect the natives to be understanding of the foriegners customs. it is really hard to tell whom prefers which treatment.

We're all guilty of the same types of behavior. what i think it really boils down to though, is, when in rome, do as the romans do.
 
BulletsFearTheBrave said:
did anybody let the japanese people standing that it was ok if they sat down?
or on a crowded bus/train stand up so that the japanese person could sit down? (age is very important).
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To the former: definitely not, that would be completely counterproductive, not to say weird. To the latter: of course! But that's not really relevant.

BulletsFearTheBrave said:
i know that sometimes it seems that people are consciously being rude, or inconsiderate of foriegners, but i should point out the obvious, cause no one else has.... YOU"RE IN JAPAN!!!
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Well, thanks for clearing that up...


GoldieGirl seemed to be saying that she and her husband compared the number of tissues packs received individually, so your husband/wife theory doesn't apply. Plus it seems that in most foreign guy/Japanese woman couples' experiences, the guy will almost always be completely ignored when dealing with Japanese waiters/shop staff/tissue issuers. It seems you're concocting an elaborate theory to circumvent the more obvious theory that many Japanese don't like to interact with foreigners if they can help it.

BulletsFearTheBrave said:
We're all guilty of the same types of behavior. what i think it really boils down to though, is, when in rome, do as the romans do.
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This of course is what most of us strive for. But if the Romans refuse to treat us like Romans, trying to do as they do becomes a thankless, frustrating task.
 
I knew I wouldn't be able to resist posting my favourite annoyances...

1) Incessant sniffing and snorting in trains. Quite revolting... thankfully this year's 'snotty season' will soon be over.

2) Foreign credit cards (Visa/MC) don't work in Japanese banks' ATMs. Oddly, Japanese credit cards work in most ATMs worldwide...

3) Veggie specific (sorry!) - just about everything on a Japanese menu, or in Japanese prepared food (including 'vegetarian' dishes) has meat, fish or chicken stock in it. Thanks heavens for Indian restaurants, inari, and the Natural House supermarket chain.

4) Being unnecessarily bumped into and jostled, especially when carrying luggage.
 
Mike Cash said:
My single largest irritation is that my apartment is only wired for 20 amps.

When I was a kid I thought the troubles Oliver Wendell Douglas had with the electricity in his delapidated farmhouse on "Green Acres" was funny. Now I live it.
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This problem has been driving me crazy! When I was living alone I tripped the breaker maybe 3 times in 2 years. Now my partner and I are tripping the damn thing several times a week (and ours is set to 30A.) Oh well, some good has come of it at least: my partner wanted me to teach her spreadsheet construction, so I instructed her how to write a spreadsheet that would calculate when the breaker would trip (incredibly nerdy I know, but necessity is the mother etc) It turns out that it's consistently tripping at about 25A, so now it's time to get an electrician in...
 
japan feels 10 degrees colder than norway. when it is 5 degrees in japan it feels like -5 degrees. the houses are not very warm so you always freeze in the winter time
 
Not being able to speak the language well.
The hot sweaty summers in suits.
Job security (which is more my own fault lol).
Hentai old man in the train.
 
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centrajapan said:
japan feels 10 degrees colder than norway. when it is 5 degrees in japan it feels like -5 degrees. the houses are not very warm so you always freeze in the winter time
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Tell me about it! I expect Norwegian houses have excellent insulation, whereas in Japan there seems to be very little: more emphasis seems to be placed on localized heating, eg sticking your legs under a heated table. When I first did that at my g/friend's parents' house I accidently kicked their slumbering dog in a place that appeared to hurt quite a lot.
 
Hi,
Each country has it's own "beauty" so accept
Spelt
 
only thing I dislike in japan is: "it's overcrowded"

centrajapan said:
japan feels 10 degrees colder than norway. when it is 5 degrees in japan it feels like -5 degrees. the houses are not very warm so you always freeze in the winter time
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wait dude, about which part of Japan are you talking about???
 
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Greetings,
I never said Japan is overcrowded... I love Japan and I have been to Japan more than 15 times... yes. I don't critisize Japan nor Japanese.
Spelt
 
Ms. Spelt, strange, I haven't said that you think Japan is overcrowded or you have criticized Japan.
 

  • Ha ha, I had the same experience. Every time I have been to the local store, I'll be humming: "It's OK, It's OK, It's OK...". A few times my wife asked me what silly melody I was humming. I feel like I become "brainwashed" by those kind of melodies.

    Rather that stimulating me to buy more, I sometimes rush out of shops when I realize that they are playing annoying music. I know that they are not targetting "gaijin" custumers, and I think that most japanese enjoys the lively cacophony in the shops.
 
My pet hates,

#1, high school kids on bikes that ride three abreast.
#2, No matter if a pedestrian is committing suicide by jumping in front of your car, you "the driver" will be 100% responsible for causing the accident.
#3, Old ladies who think it is their birth right to cut line and push in front of you when you have been patiently waiting at a supermarket register.
#4, People who bump into you and don't appologise.
#5, People who stare at you with no response when walking into a shop that a "gaijin" would not normally frequent.
#6, Credit card companies, discrination has no bounds.
#7, Taxi drivers, (well this goes for the rest of the world too)


There is probably more things that I like about Japan than dislike, but in line with the thread.
 
to be perfectly honest when people asked me about my trips and what I liked about Japan I would always reply that the best thing was that no-one ever sits next to you on a train or bus so you end up with more personal space
 
I honestly haven't been to Japan, but nonetheless, I wouldn't mind the extra room either, considering I'm 190 centimeters tall.
However I'm an extremely shy person as well, and I'd avoid sitting next to strangers myself here in the U.S., no matter what language they speak.
Ultimately because of the fear of them talking to me. (fear of not knowing what to say or talk about.)
 

I agree with Fuma Kamui. You should _never_ complain if you receive a compliment, but you should be grateful, no matter how many times you have heard it or how long time you have known how to do things. You should be happy that you are that good? Just say thank you and explain if you want, how you have learnt it. That's what I do and get a nice conversation with new people as well.
 
FrustratedDave said:
My pet hates,
#7, Taxi drivers, (well this goes for the rest of the world too)
There is probably more things that I like about Japan than dislike, but in line with the thread.
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Oh, funny, I really like them! I have always had good service from them (except once when my journey would've been too short..), and especially if I'm with my Japanese boyfriend. We always start chatting with them and get extra information, eg. when we were in Kyoto we got some interesting historical facts from a smiling friendly ojii-san.

But what bugs me a bit, I have to confess, is the overwhelming patronising I receive here... In a way I'm grateful for it as well, of course, but since I'm really used to being quite independent (being a Scandinavian equality supporting woman), I sometimes get really annoyed. I like to make my own decisions, go to places by myself, find out things by myself etc. My boyfriends family and friends are sometimes treating me like I would be a really fragile thing(=a woman?a gaijin woman?) and like I couldn't do things by myself or go to places by myself.. it means sometimes I have to change or cancel some plans I had in my mind, so that I wouldn't offend them or cause controversy between my bf and his family.
For example sometimes they are too worried about my health, meaning I should go to bed earlier, I should drink less alcohol, or I shouldn't travel by myself.Or that they are recommending what I should eat in a restaurant to stay _healthy_ or "make my skin or hair blossom".. Really sweet of them, but oh how annoying as well.
 
Looking at the same tired selection of fried foods in my local grocery store. Change it up for frack's sake... Man does not subsist on agemono alone.

Little kids who I have in class for the first time who like to run up and poke me in my wang wang. HELLO?!?! Mom, teach your kid some manners.

The overwhelming stench of cigarette smoke whenever I go to my favorite izukaya. Apparently they have never heard of "no-smoking" at this establishment.

And the list goes on... just minor silly stuff mostly. Been here for too long now to take any of it seriously. And of course the fact that the lovely ladies wear skirts and heels 24/7, 365 days a year always makes up for my minor gripes 8-p
 
Finding an open dojo, going in, start training and Japanese people look at you like; OMG, a white guy practicing kendo!

Also, being the tallest in most crowds (6foot 4inches tall, size 13 feet (UK))

Joe
 
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nice gaijin
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