Need some help translating a few things

[a69165]

To begin with, let me just say that I'm trying to translate a few sentences from screenshots I have.. and It's very hard to me, to understand the meaning of this one. I would be grateful if you helped me :S

 

[Toritoribe]

Most of them are the author's coined words, thus, it's hard to translate. What part of the phrases can't you get concretely?