RockLee said:
But today she said something that sounded to me as if non-Japanese can't learn/master Japanese in a few years or less.I use kanji in my texts and words I don't know I look up.She said my level of Japanese is not so high,and when there is a lot of kanji in my text it looks weird to her because I'm still at a beginnerlevel.I can use it when my level is higher ? what is that supposed to mean? If I can write/understand the kanji I use it, that's the only way I'll learn.It seems to me that Japanese think you can't understand or write kanji or are not supposed to write it unless you studied it for lots of years and Japanese is a very difficult language.It seems to me they are jealous of people who can master the language in a few years or have little difficulty with it.Did you experience something like this before?
I don't know anything other than what you've posted here, but my gut reaction is that your friend probably doesn't have this in mind at all.
This will probably come out wrong, but I think that your friend is comparing your Japanese to the Japanese of native Japanese children. For example, this was written by a 1st year primary student several years ago.
ツ 窶堋ケ窶堙ア窶堋ケ窶堋「ツ、窶堋?窶堙娯?堙仰。
ツ 窶堋ォ窶堙・窶堋、窶堙債、ナ?wツ校窶堙娯?堋ゥ窶堋ヲ窶堙ィツ、窶愿ア窶扼ツ青カ窶堙娯?堙懌?堋「ナスq窶堋ソ窶堙。窶堙ア窶堙??愿アツ人窶堙??堋ゥ窶堋ヲ窶堙ィ窶堙懌?堋オ窶堋スツ。
ツ 窶堋「窶堙や?堙?窶堙ヲ窶堙ィツ、窶堋キ窶堋イ窶堋ュ窶伉≫?堋ュ窶堋、窶堋ソ窶堙俄?堙や?堋ォ窶堙懌?堋オ窶堋スツ。窶堋、窶堋ソ窶堙俄?堙や?堋ュ窶堙?、窶堋「窶堋ヲ窶堙俄?堋セ窶堙ェ窶堙?窶堋「窶堙遺?堋ゥ窶堙≫?堋ス窶堙娯?堙?、窶堋キ窶堋ア窶堋オツ、窶堋ウ窶堙昶?堋オ窶堋ゥ窶堙≫?堋ス窶堙??堋キツ。
ツ 窶堙??堙?ツ、窶堙壺?堋ュ窶堙債、窶堋ェ窶堙ア窶堙寂?堙ィ窶堙懌?堋オ窶堋スツ。窶堙懌?堋クツ、窶堋ォ窶堋ェ窶堋ヲ窶堙ー窶堋オ窶堙懌?堋オ窶堋スツ。窶堋サ窶堙ェ窶堋ゥ窶堙ァニ弾ニ椎槌池窶堙ー窶堙や?堋ッ窶堙?、窶堋ィ窶堙寂?堋?窶堋ソ窶堙。窶堙ア窶堋ェ窶堋ゥ窶堋ヲ窶堙≫?堙??堋ュ窶堙ゥ窶堙娯?堙ー窶堙懌?堋ソ窶堙懌?堋オ窶堋スツ。ナスOツ十窶堙補?堙ア窶堋ョ窶堙ァ窶堋「ツ、窶堙懌?堋ソ窶堙懌?堋オ窶堋スツ。
ツ 窶堙坂?堋カ窶堙溪?堙??ェツ人窶堙?、窶堙ゥ窶堋キ窶堙寂?堙ア窶堋オ窶堙懌?堋オ窶堋スツ。窶堋ォ窶堋ソ窶堙ア窶堙??堙ゥ窶堋キ窶堙寂?堙ア窶堋ェ窶堙??堋ォ窶堋ス窶堋ゥ窶堙ァツ、窶堙昶?堙ア窶堙遺?堋ゥ窶堙ァ窶堙吮?堙溪?堙ァ窶堙ェ窶堙懌?堋オ窶堋スツ。窶堋、窶堙ェ窶堋オ窶堋ゥ窶堙≫?堋ス窶堙??堋キツ。
How does this compare to your Japanese? Your friend probably had this kind of composition in mind when she told you that. This was written exactly as I typed it by a native Japanese speaker. Granted the writer was only like 6 or 7 years old, but just by reading this, one can see that this child, although good for his or her age, has limited control of the Japanese language. Many 1st year students would write in a similar manner.
Japanese people come into the most contact with such writing from young Japanese children, not foreigners of a more mature age, so their ideas of what "normal" for "students' of Japanese" writing is based primarily on this.
Japanese people learn kanji over an extended period of time (minimum of 6 years primary school and 3 years middle school), so their first reaction is most likely that it takes a long time to learn kanji regardless of nationality. It's not a direct insult to you as a foreigner; it's just what your friend knows from her own experience.
Please bear with your friend. Your friendship is making her more worldly and knowledgeable about people language in general.
I find it's much better to try to find an alternate reason for comments such as that than to assume prejudice. It will save you a lot of stress, for sure!