I think that if you are not loved back it is not love. Well... How can you possibly love someone that doesn't love you? It just doesn't work. I wish love was easy. But it's not.
In Buddhism, everything is empty(or non-substantial) in nature. It teaches that all things arise and cease depending on causes and conditions. When we say that everything is "empty," we do not mean that things do not exist. What we mean is that things are always elements in a process of change and interdependence. When we learn to see things as processes and not as isolated finite objects then we will see that to talk of something being "created" or "destroyed" is only true conventionally. The network of causes and conditions that bring any "thing" into existence is actually a never-ending process with no boundaries.
Buddhist scholar Nagarjuna, living in India between 150 and 250 C.E. believed that the state of "neither existence nor nonexistence"(Jp: Ku) described in this concept expressed the true nature of all things. The paradoxical nature of this idea, however, makes it somewhat foreign to Western dualist logic, and has helped contribute to a stereotype of Buddhism as a detached, mystical philosophy which sees the world as a grand illusion. The implications of ku, however, are much more down-to-earth, and are in fact consistent with the findings of contemporary science.
Modern physics, in attempting to discover the essence of matter, has arrived at a description of the world that is very close to that of Nagarjuna. What scientists have discovered is that there is no actual, easily identifiable "thing" at the basis of matter. Subatomic particles, the building blocks of the physical world that we inhabit, appear to oscillate between states of being and nonbeing. Instead of a fixed "thing" in a particular place, we find only shifting waves of probability. At this level, the world is actually a highly fluid and unpredictable place, essentially without substance. It is this non-substantial nature of reality that the concept of ku describes.
Ku also elucidates the latent potential inherent in life. Consider how, when we are in the grip of a powerful emotion, such as anger, this expresses itself in our entire being--our glaring expression, raised voice, tensed body and so on. When our temper cools, the anger disappears. What has happened to it? We know anger still exists somewhere within us, but until something causes us to feel angry again, we can find no evidence of its existence. To all intents and purposes, it has ceased to exist. Memories are another example; we are unaware of their existence until they suddenly rise into our consciousness. The rest of the time, as with our anger, they are in a state of latency, or ku: they exist and yet they do not.
An understanding of ku, therefore, helps us to see that, despite how we may see them, things--people, situations, relationships, our own lives--are not fixed, but dynamic, constantly changing and evolving. They are filled with latent potential which can become manifest at any time. Even the most seemingly hopeless situation has within it astoundingly positive possibilities.
The most positive and constructive view is to believe in the unbounded positive potential inherent in all life. Buddhism terms this potential--the real nature of life--"Buddhahood," which Nichiren defined as Nam-myoho-renge-kyo.
I think that if you are not loved back it is not love. Well... How can you possibly love someone that doesn't love you? It just doesn't work. I wish love was easy. But it's not.
In Buddhism, everything is empty(or non-substantial) in nature. It teaches that all things arise and cease depending on causes and conditions. When we say that everything is "empty," we do not mean that things do not exist. What we mean is that things are always elements in a process of change and interdependence. When we learn to see things as processes and not as isolated finite objects then we will see that to talk of something being "created" or "destroyed" is only true conventionally. The network of causes and conditions that bring any "thing" into existence is actually a never-ending process with no boundaries.
Buddhist scholar Nagarjuna, living in India between 150 and 250 C.E. believed that the state of "neither existence nor nonexistence"(Jp: Ku) described in this concept expressed the true nature of all things. The paradoxical nature of this idea, however, makes it somewhat foreign to Western dualist logic, and has helped contribute to a stereotype of Buddhism as a detached, mystical philosophy which sees the world as a grand illusion. The implications of ku, however, are much more down-to-earth, and are in fact consistent with the findings of contemporary science.
Modern physics, in attempting to discover the essence of matter, has arrived at a description of the world that is very close to that of Nagarjuna. What scientists have discovered is that there is no actual, easily identifiable "thing" at the basis of matter. Subatomic particles, the building blocks of the physical world that we inhabit, appear to oscillate between states of being and nonbeing. Instead of a fixed "thing" in a particular place, we find only shifting waves of probability. At this level, the world is actually a highly fluid and unpredictable place, essentially without substance. It is this non-substantial nature of reality that the concept of ku describes.
Ku also elucidates the latent potential inherent in life. Consider how, when we are in the grip of a powerful emotion, such as anger, this expresses itself in our entire being--our glaring expression, raised voice, tensed body and so on. When our temper cools, the anger disappears. What has happened to it? We know anger still exists somewhere within us, but until something causes us to feel angry again, we can find no evidence of its existence. To all intents and purposes, it has ceased to exist. Memories are another example; we are unaware of their existence until they suddenly rise into our consciousness. The rest of the time, as with our anger, they are in a state of latency, or ku: they exist and yet they do not.
An understanding of ku, therefore, helps us to see that, despite how we may see them, things--people, situations, relationships, our own lives--are not fixed, but dynamic, constantly changing and evolving. They are filled with latent potential which can become manifest at any time. Even the most seemingly hopeless situation has within it astoundingly positive possibilities.
The most positive and constructive view is to believe in the unbounded positive potential inherent in all life. Buddhism terms this potential--the real nature of life--"Buddhahood," which Nichiren defined as Nam-myoho-renge-kyo.
May All living beings Happy...
I heard about Mr Buddha and many other Philosophers, prophets etc.. but I never met them, and I don't know them, maybe they were just normal people like us (human perhaps?)
Teaching or not, preaching or not, those principles are not rock science, those thoughts about goodness and whatever have alwasy been there floating around, actually a human common sence, or maybe was already within our self the human good nature, and the bad nature too!!!
Only my temporary opinion.
I think you might be thinking of "enjoying the process" versus doing something with the expectation of results. But of course when emotions come into it, things can get confusing and "messy". I don't know who said it, but this makes sense: "Don't expect anything and you won't be disappointed."
Posted by Nichiren:
In Buddhism, everything is empty(or non-substantial) in nature. It teaches that all things arise and cease depending on causes and conditions. When we say that everything is "empty," we do not mean that things do not exist. What we mean is that things are always elements in a process of change and interdependence. ...
An understanding of ku, therefore, helps us to see that, despite how we may see them, things--people, situations, relationships, our own lives--are not fixed, but dynamic, constantly changing and evolving. They are filled with latent potential which can become manifest at any time. Even the most seemingly hopeless situation has within it astoundingly positive possibilities.
This is very interesting! It makes sense that things can be latent, and that just because we can't see them doesn't mean they don't exist. It also sounds like we create things (and don't create things) more than we realize.
Dostoyevski explores this idea in his novel, Notes From The Underground. He basically wrote that the void missing in man's life today is unconditional love. He believed you could receive this unconditional love through God.
I'm sure you could find instances of unconditional love, especially on the small scale like charity, doing volunteer work, etc. As for a relationship, I'm not so sure because like Yumeitsumo said, it's hard to love someone who doesn't love you. Still, it could be possible. And even then, unconditional love is loving someone and not expecting anything in return. It is loving one another "through thick and thin." So in this sense, yes, I do believe unconditional love can and does exist.
I believe the love that a mother feels for her child CAN be unconditional, whether the child loves her back or not. I think it's 100% possible to love someone even if it's not reflected back. Again, it CAN be unconditional, but maybe not so much if it's not a maternal connection. If something were conditional, it would mean that there are factors that have the potential in putting an end to that emotion, feeling, etc.
I absolutely believe in unconditional love, but it's something that a person has to work at, and choose to do. Its very easy to not want to keep loving someone/something, but when you choose to be unconditional, you can.
I believe the love that a mother feels for her child CAN be unconditional, whether the child loves her back or not. I think it's 100% possible to love someone even if it's not reflected back. Again, it CAN be unconditional, but maybe not so much if it's not a maternal connection. If something were conditional, it would mean that there are factors that have the potential in putting an end to that emotion, feeling, etc.
I totally agree with you here. I was thinking more along the lines of Grandparents though, I have yet to meet a grandpa that doesn't love at least one of his grandkids unconditionally.
Unconditional love is NOT simply caring about or being with someone through thick and thin, irregardless of how you feel. Feelings are the center of unconditionality. There is nothing in our existence that is absolute besides our feelings. Those feelings are something we cannot change. However, as one of the people above me already mentioned, unconditional love is a feeling you choose to feel. There might be conditions to create unconditional love, but that feeling in itself cannot be changed once it is felt for another person. You can call this true love if you wanted to. A person who's love is true is only true because the person puts forth energy to and feelings that create that feeling of absolute and unconditional love. When the person decides to stop feeling the love, it is impossible because one cannot change his own feelings. Therefore, it requires the conditions to be met that create an environment of unconditional love, not just the state of unconditional love.
An environment based on a certain principle is the only thing that will establish the truth of that principle. A person's soul that is geared around the desire for unconditional love will create unconditional love themselves, and eventually others who's environments are similar, will bring them together in a harmonious system of unconditional love. However, for most people, being loved and loving unconditionally is enough to thrive without fail. Therefore, unconditional love will truly remain unconditional since it stabilizes the system.
The original state of unconditional love is latent in the originating entity, whereas other entities sharing that latent state combine together to actually bring about the truth of the system into a singular unified whole. At this point, the truth of the system is no longer latent since it has others to share the same ideal. The dualistic cohesion creates the conditions needed to bring about a harmony in the entities, thus bringing realization to its latent truth. And if that latent truth is decided to be unconditional love, then that truth must exist through some unconditional relationship external to the originating entity.
Feelings arise unconditionally through our relationship to our world, and thus they are shaped by our world, not us. So our truths, no matter how great to us, have to have certain connections and relationships to allow their existance in the first place beyond ourselves in order to share them with others. Unconditional love is possible if a person feels strongly about it in themselves to love another person that way, but it's stupid to blind yourself to your feelings to try to create a harmony in another without knowing it already exists within the other person as the same feeling as you. Without both sides feeling unconditionality, a shared unconditional love is impossible. However, one person, such as a mother or father loving a child can be unconditional even if the child doesn't love them back to the extent that they are loved. However, no matter what, even if the child doesn't realize it, the parent has instilled some sense of unconditional love in them. It's up to the child to choose to listen to that or deny it. No matter what, the child does not hate a person who loves him/her unconditionally even if their love is not that intense.
So, ultimately, as long as a person chooses to love another, no matter what, even if his or her body falls apart, even if the person's very existence is lost in the mind of the other person, one can call their love unconditional, since their feelings are based on their desire and choice to love.
If that desire to love is absolute and relentless, if that choice is a promise, a commitment beyond time and space, and even feeling, that person can truly say love is unconditional.
This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
