Gaydar and the Chart

kirei_na_me said:
I can't believe Mike is quoting a Coolio song.

That's...pretty interesting.
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When the revolution comes, I'm gonna be up front.
 
I can usually tell if someone is gay or not ,but once I was talking a guy about one of his friends ,this really goodlooking girl and he talked about her ,like he was just a as straight as an arrow but 2 hours later he was having some fun with another guy so Im not absolutly sure if I have the ability to spot gays. :p
 
Did you know, it's actually much harder to transmit STDs between two women then two men or a man and a woman.

To moffeltoff: Bisexuality is normally the answer to that.
 
Hyde_is_my_anti-drug said:
Did you know, it's actually much harder to transmit STDs between two women.....
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Yes, I am aware of that. Did you know "much harder" means only that? And that when one makes a fun-n-cool game out of promiscuity eventually the law of averages catches up with them?
..... than two men or a man and a woman?
You write down your name and the names of all the girls/guys you've been with......Then you write down all the names of the people those people have been with and connect those names.......eventually you'll have lines connect to multiple people all over the Chart.......There's also a game that goes with it, seeing how many moves (connections between names) it takes to link you to your gay/bi friends
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Sort of renders the false sense of STD security one gets from lesbianism moot, doesn't it?
 
Sexual orientation is not only about sex. It's about relationships, that personal connection between two people.

This chart idea worries me, especially the "game" aspect, because it makes it seem that it's all about sex and sexual partners.

It seems extremely irresponsible, in my humble opinion.
 
Agh, no it is not about sex. It's about relationships. You don't have to have sex with someone for their name to get connected to yours. It is not about sex or promiscuity it is about the connections human beings make between each other. The Chart has nothing to do with sex.

And again, this is NOT a section for defending or debunking the Gay Community. Thank you. Actually, I intended this section for other gays and lesbians to talk about these things and their own experiences. NOT so you guys could try and find fault with our way of life.
 
I'm not very knowledgable in this area but can lesbians i mean really have sex? Or do you call that lesbian sex? :?
 
That depends on what you mean by "sex."

But we can have sex, definitly not in the way straight couples do, but we can still have sex.
 
Hyde_is_my_anti-drug said:
Agh, no it is not about sex. It's about relationships. You don't have to have sex with someone for their name to get connected to yours. It is not about sex or promiscuity it is about the connections human beings make between each other. The Chart has nothing to do with sex.
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How very nice it would have been had that been made clear at the beginning. Or at least the first time sexual relations were directly implied (when I brought up STD).

And again, this is NOT a section for defending or debunking the Gay Community.
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Has someone been doing that? Other than yourself, I mean.

Thank you. Actually, I intended this section for other gays and lesbians to talk about these things and their own experiences. NOT so you guys could try and find fault with our way of life.
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The only thing that could even remotely be taken as finding fault so far has been the mention of promiscuity leading to a heightened risk of STD.

Do you mean to say you think promiscuity and STD are exclusive to the gay/lesbian community? None of the people who have discussed that so far have framed their comments in a way that could be construed as being applicable exclusively to homosexuals (or bisexuals). Why do you read it that way?
 
Mike, I really don't know what you want from me. I have apologized to you and since treated you civilly whereas you seem bent to make my life hell. I am not going to sections you've made/are posting on and harassing you, why must you do that to me? I would think that someone who's so found of accusing others of immaturity that you yourself would be careful not to display juvenile behavior. Apparently not.
I am going to ask you nicely to leave me alone. Please, leave me alone. I am tired of being attacked by you and constantly having to defend myself to you. So please just leave me alone.
 
I like to think I've been civil as well. If I've been nasty or juvenile I'm afraid I'll need to have it pointed out to me just where it was.

I regret that you have perceived my interactions with you in this thread as attacks. Is it that this was supposed to be a homosexual/bisexual only thread and participation from heterosexuals is not welcome?
 
Hyde_is_my_anti-drug said:
Agh, no it is not about sex. It's about relationships.
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I'm very glad to see we agree on this point!
You don't have to have sex with someone for their name to get connected to yours. It is not about sex or promiscuity it is about the connections human beings make between each other. The Chart has nothing to do with sex.
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So then what is the purpose of the chart? I honestly don't understand what purpose it fulfills...

And again, this is NOT a section for defending or debunking the Gay Community. Thank you. Actually, I intended this section for other gays and lesbians to talk about these things and their own experiences. NOT so you guys could try and find fault with our way of life.
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I am not finding anything at fault with any "way of life" here if you mean the "way of life" being homosexuality. I would have the exact same message for any 16 year old who talked about "charts" and what not.

And remember, it is possible to vehemently disagree about certain aspects of something without denying the validity of the overarching concept.

I guess I don't like the idea of the chart because it makes a game out of human relationships. Relationships are not a game. Believe me on this, relationships are too important to trivialize by seeing how "far removed" you are from another friend.

However, I am not opposed to homosexuality, nor am I trying to convince you or anyone else to change your sexual orientation.

If I gave you another impression, I apologize fully.

But now that you know more or less where I stand, I ask in return that you understand that I am not "gay-bashing" or doing anything of the like.

I am not gay, but this is a public forum. If you want to start a new thread, you must remember that it is open to everyone to respond. I don't see why I should be excluded from the conversation based purely on my sexual orientation.
 
Mike Cash said:
I like to think I've been civil as well. If I've been nasty or juvenile I'm afraid I'll need to have it pointed out to me just where it was.
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Post #2, post #5, post #22 whether you believe it or not that is harassment and not even in the same area code as civil.
I regret that you have perceived my interactions with you in this thread as attacks. Is it that this was supposed to be a homosexual/bisexual only thread and participation from heterosexuals is not welcome?
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No, it's not that straights aren't welcome at all but this thread was indeed meant more for gays. Oh, and if your "interactions" weren't attacks then just what were they? There's no such thing as good natured harassment.
Mikawa Ossen said:
I guess I don't like the idea of the chart because it makes a game out of human relationships. Relationships are not a game. Believe me on this, relationships are too important to trivialize by seeing how "far removed" you are from another friend.
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When did I say that the relationships themselves were a game? They aren't. Relationships are messy and very serious. I am not trying to make it seem otherwise.
I am not gay, but this is a public forum. If you want to start a new thread, you must remember that it is open to everyone to respond. I don't see why I should be excluded from the conversation based purely on my sexual orientation.
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I never said straights weren't welcome.
 
i can spot a person who is gay sometimes. i mean some of them are usually obvious with the actions and public displays. but if they are what you call "unreadables" then i guess not. maybe i can only tell if i talk to them. there are also guys who act totally gay but in actuality they like girls. i didn't know there were charts though. it seems pretty meaningless to me. i have some lesbian friends but none of them does a chart
 
Hyde_is_my_anti-drug said:
Post #2, post #5, post #22 whether you believe it or not that is harassment and not even in the same area code as civil.
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That helps, thanks.

Numbers 2 and 5 were pointing out the intellectual dishonesty of getting ruffled over having your name atop the thread I posted, since it seemed to be focussed on your sexuality.....and then going on and creating something with your name attached and even more clearly focussed on your sexuality yourself. Hardly qualifies as harassment.


Number 22 was made in the mistaken assumption that the chart pertained to sexual relations. Were it not a reasonable mistake to make, I would consider apologizing.

No, it's not that straights aren't welcome at all but this thread was indeed meant more for gays. Oh, and if your "interactions" weren't attacks then just what were they? There's no such thing as good natured harassment.
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You're right. There is no such thing as good-natured harassment. But there is such a thing as good-natured needling. And not every post which is at odds with your own is either harassment or even needling.

Not to change the subject or anything....but I was really saddened to see that you had deleted the nice congratulatory note I left for you. I spent at least a couple of hours on your blog and your mother's blog trying to get to know and understand better you and your life, and hoped that we could get along better (while continuing to feel free to disagree, of course). I still hope so.
 
Hyde_is_my_anti-drug said:
When did I say that the relationships themselves were a game? They aren't. Relationships are messy and very serious. I am not trying to make it seem otherwise.
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I never said that I thought your were saying that relationships themselves were a game. Perhaps I misunderstood what you meant then by
There's also a game that goes with it, seeing how many moves (connections between names) it takes to link you to your gay/bi friends.
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I never said straights weren't welcome.
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Thanks!
 
Had a weird experience awhile back concerning Gaydar...well, sorta Gaydar or lack thereof really. So I was talking to this guy at my drama school and he was totally trying pick me up. But get this, I was wearing like 3 Gay Pride pins on my shirt. Maybe he can't read, maybe he was doing it on purpose, I don't know but it was certainly weird. :eek2:
 
Well you're just 16 and you will still change quite a bit emotionally so ,perhaps he thought it might be worth a try.^^
My best friend was absolutly convinced he was gay but now he's a real player and all the ladies love him.
But then again who knows perhaps that guy was just plain stupid. :D
 
Mycernius said:
Just a quick note on the words Fag and Faggot. In the UK a fag is the slang word used for a cigarette. Hence when I was in Canada and the girl I was with asked where she could buy some fags my Canadian cousin fell about laughing and we had to expalin the difference. A Faggot is a name given to a spicy meatball with gravy that you can buy in shops. The most famous are Brains Faggots. Sometimes found in fish and chip shops ie: faggots and chips.
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A faggot is also the name for a bit of wood thats for the express use as firewood , example; "Throw another faggot onto the fire".
Yes us europeans are a more mature refined bunch (we wish). :p

In the regard to the teenage things, even i, the most awsome lady pleaser ever (with a grand total of one sexual partners in my life) once wondered if i was gay, its just something folk go through. :p
 
Well, I'm pretty secure in my sexuality and I don't see that changing. That doesn't mean I don't ever question myself though, people who never question themselves scare me really. But every time I do I always come up with the same answer. Yep, I'm about as straight as a push-cart wheel. :-)
 
I am straight. I am very secure with myself. I can admit that there are attractive guys out there. But I don't think anything of it, but "dang, I bet they could get girls over me anyday" yep.
 
Why would people who don't question thier sexuality scare you. If your being somewhat serious. I know with out a doubt I love women. And never thought about a man sexually or had the slightest hint of a thought. I think some people are just set in thier way.
 
I dunno, just people who say, "Yeah, I'm totally straight! No gay thoughts here! Never question myself EVER. Men, completely straight." scare me and the same goes for the opposite. I feel, and this is just my personal opinion, that if you don't question it then how can you know for sure? If you are really straight or really gay then if you question it you should come up with the same answer that you started with no matter what. So why all the stigma around questioning your orientation if you really are straight/gay to the core? 'Cause if you really are then it couldn't possibly hurt you to think or to ask questions of yourself, now could it?
 
I don't get it. Aren't you just born gay or straight? Why would asking questions about it possibly change it? Isn't that like saying "you should ask yourself whether you're really caucasian?" I was under the impression that it wasn't possible to change sexual orientation. People know because they feel a sexual attraction to a gender...how is that questionable?
 
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