Can't manage my life on my own... MOMMY!!

Suki-Yaki

Suki-Yaki

焼肉わが家が一番
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My life is a mess and I don't know how to get outta this hole !!!

To start off , my room is so dirty I have to dig in search of the bed every night I come back .

I am eating conbini foods everyday , it's been like a month since I cooked and there is rotten growing all over my fridge .

I mixed some clothes which I shouldn't have together into the washing machine and got a colourful result .. :eek:

basically , I can't do it nomore !!

I don't know how it's happening , but everything keeps getting outta control , and I can't manage my life style on my own ...

I can't live alone !!!

I thought maybe getting a roommate will solve it all. But y'see , I live in a very small room (yes only one room). And I was blessed that I am the only nationality of my kind in a dormitory where they only put the same nationalities together. So I was to live alone in my room. Which I am not willing to give up, I need the privacy!

It's been three months now since I moved to Japan , and it's all going on the same routine. But today I bought a "fried chicken" that was greasy and un-well cooked and so bakteria-filled-like that I figured , something gotta change here !!
🎳

I am willing to get a job soon , so I am hoping to save myself before it is too late ..... 🎳
 
It's part of life Sukiyaki, a combi of chaos and order. To be able to appreciate good order perhaps you have to go thru the misfortune in chaos.

ax
 
I am willing to get a job soon , so I am hoping to save myself before it is too late ..... 😭
Click to expand...
It is never too late dear, as long as you are not in denial.
You seem to have a healthy, cheerful personality which is a blessing.
When you try to solve a problem, you may be thinking too much, even procrastinating a major decision.
In a way, you could even have some prefectionist tendency, which may be working against you at times; especially when you need some action.
If you feel that things have reached a point where you feel hopless or fully out of control, this is the best time to start acting.
Do something.
Right now.
Don't put it off, 'cause tomorrow, the mess will be even greater.
We all live with one or two nasty habits.
Just break out of the one that's bugging you right now.
Simply put, CLEAN UP YOUR ROOM JUST ENOUGH SO YOU CAN SLEEP WITHOUT MAJOR DIGGING, NOW! 👍
 
Go to a 100en store, a hardware store, the local combini and buy garbage bags.

Get all the junk (you'll have lots, weird gaijin habit) and put it in the bags.

Keep going till its all gone and dispose of the bags appropriately!

Right, now can you cook? Do you have access to a kitchen? Eggs are the best thing for you, you are young, the cholesterol wont kill you yet ;) Lots of things you can make there... get a rice cooker and make curry. COOK. Lets say cook twice a week, then later on 3 times a week then 4 etc, till you dont need the combini.

As for the rest 100en shop time again! Get some plastic boxes or baskets and sort the other stuff about your room out.

I wouldnt get a roomie if you only have one room, you'll go nuts within 2 days unless you dont mind being cramped in there with someone else, having to get changed in there, do whatever (homework? cleaning etc) else in there with someone else.

And if you cant handle it anymore just sign over all your belongings over to me and I'll catch the next flight over. I dont mind slogging it out :D
 
First things first, suki----CALM DOWN!!!! Breathe in, breathe out. Do that several times. I'll wait until you're done.

Okay, next thing, grab a pencil and notebook and jot down a list of things you need to do in order to get organized, be precise, leave nothing to chance. Once you have a list, go over it several times, don't rush, take your time, make sure you haven't missed anything. I live alone and do that weekly, and it helps immensely. Trust me.

I agree with Ewok that you should dispose of anything you really don't need. It would also help to make a list of things you can do without, be ruthless here, get rid of anything that isn't absolutely essential to your life. You'll be surprised at how much needless junk you actually have and can live without. This will help you achieve order.

Bottom line, no situation is hopeless unless you allow it to be, and never allow yourself get trapped in that sort of negative thinking! So, pick yourself off the floor and get going---- THAT'S AN ORDER!!!!
:-)
 
It's better to spend 10 minutes a day cleaning up than to intend to spend an hour cleaning up on Saturday or Sunday and not do it because the job looks so overwhelming.
 
Just wondering, but are the other students in your dorm complete and utter bastards? Or perhaps they all suffer from some revolting skin disease. Or perhaps are members of a cult or an organised church - or simply are about as much fun as a fart in a space-suit.

Who lives in your dorm? Are none of the other residents studying in your faculty?

Do you have high-speed internet access in your room or cable TV or Skyperfect? I know many people keep sane during the cold winter months round here thanks to one or more of those services. (Yes, I have all three I admit it - if I had to watch terrestrial television only I'd probably take an axe to my students!)
 
Oh Oh !!

Change your ways now or you will be doomed to a life of clutter! My cellar looks like the Smithsonian Museum crammed into one room. I can't throw anything away for fear it might be worth something someday. Half my trash goes into boxes so I can examine it later to make sure it's trash I can afford to throw away. I developed these evil habits as a youth about your age, watch out! Learn to throw & heave now or be buried in your own junk for the rest of your life. Good luck!

Uncle Frank

😊
 
Gee everyone has such good advice. I say heave the crap just do it right now. Just clear the bed and fold a few clothes. Air your room or get some good smelling room freshener. Eat some greens. Have a raw peice of fruit. I bet you are consitpated. It comes through in your actions. A cluttered colon leads to a cluttered life. Good luck and live life even if it is cold. Uncle Frank is right. Your clutter could last a lifetime if you don't do something now!!!! Hurry up get off the computer and clean!
Sista
 
Thanks for the advice guys ... and ..

I COOKED TODAY !!!

I call it "(insert name here) TamaToma o' Formagge!" .

And it was , oishii !! 🙂

Basically it was all about fried eggs , unsliced cute little tomatoes , and cheese. It was so easy to make , seeing that I had not any experience in cooking before i came to japan. I made it and ate it in less than half an hour !!

I know I can't clear alla the mess in my room all at once , atleast not now since it's time for my Kanji exams. But I will try to clean everything up before the opening of the next week !

You seem to have a healthy, cheerful personality which is a blessing.
Click to expand...

I always try to convince myself of that , Lexico-san. But I think it's my kinda personality that's bringing me all of this trouble. And especially that recently , I have entered into a desperate love circleﾂ that's affecting much of my mood and habits. So either I am too happy to clean / wash/ cook . Or I am damn too angry to care .. 😊

Right, now can you cook? Do you have access to a kitchen? Eggs are the best thing for you, you are young, the cholesterol wont kill you yet ;) Lots of things you can make there... get a rice cooker and make curry. COOK. Lets say cook twice a week, then later on 3 times a week then 4 etc, till you dont need the combini.

As for the rest 100en shop time again! Get some plastic boxes or baskets and sort the other stuff about your room out.
Click to expand...

I think the next stop should be curry. They give us rice cookers at this dorm. Usually I'd buy something ready , or eat it at my friends. But let's see how good MY curry will be ... :devilish:

I feel the 100 en shop is one of the main reasons for the mess in my room. don't know why , perhaps becuase I am going by there very oftenly . I think the right thing to do is stay away from there for a while ...

I agree with Ewok that you should dispose of anything you really don't need. It would also help to make a list of things you can do without, be ruthless here, get rid of anything that isn't absolutely essential to your life. You'll be surprised at how much needless junk you actually have and can live without. This will help you achieve order.

Bottom line, no situation is hopeless unless you allow it to be, and never allow yourself get trapped in that sort of negative thinking! So, pick yourself off the floor and get going---- THAT'S AN ORDER!!!!
Click to expand...


Aye aye capitan !!

I agree the main reason the mess is growing bigger , is because I don't have the heart to throw many things. like for example my very first wooden hashis , anime empty boxes , brochures and event advertisements .. etc .. etc ..

Everything is meaning a memory to me. About a month ago I made a major clean-up. But still couldn't throw such stuff , instead stocked them in some neat places. :eek:
But seeing the link MikeCash san has referred to. That's almost the way I'd be if I had a bigger house .I am horrified to end up this way!
Just to imagine the lady could get a big bag and slide all those stuff straight into it , ending up with more space. but she couldn't becuase she is probably held by her imotions .. (or very very lazy to do so :p )

It's better to spend 10 minutes a day cleaning up than to intend to spend an hour cleaning up on Saturday or Sunday and not do it because the job looks so overwhelming.
Click to expand...

... You where there ... that's exactly what happens .. !! 😲

Just wondering, but are the other students in your dorm complete and utter bastards? Or perhaps they all suffer from some revolting skin disease. Or perhaps are members of a cult or an organised church - or simply are about as much fun as a fart in a space-suit.

Who lives in your dorm? Are none of the other residents studying in your faculty?

Do you have high-speed internet access in your room or cable TV or Skyperfect? I know many people keep sane during the cold winter months round here thanks to one or more of those services. (Yes, I have all three I admit it - if I had to watch terrestrial television only I'd probably take an axe to my students!)
Click to expand...

Yes infact there are lotsa nice people at my dorm . I used to invite some of the girls into my room before , when I first came. But as my study hours have changed , and am returning really late everyday. I kinda don't communicate a lot with them anymore.
There is no one , however , in my dorms close enough in terms to telling about this problem. I am usually whinning about it with my school friends and some other people, but they are never here to see it ...

needless to say it embarrasses me enough . Usually it's boys who are bachelor pigs , not girls ! :p 😊 :eek:

"Change your ways now or you will be doomed to a life of clutter! My cellar looks like the Smithsonian Museum crammed into one room. I can't throw anything away for fear it might be worth something someday. Half my trash goes into boxes so I can examine it later to make sure it's trash I can afford to throw away. I developed these evil habits as a youth about your age, watch out! Learn to throw & heave now or be buried in your own junk for the rest of your life. Good luck!

Uncle Frank"
Click to expand...

Oh Uncly Frank I was wishing for your words !!

Have a raw peice of fruit. I bet you are consitpated. It comes through in your actions. A cluttered colon leads to a cluttered life.
Click to expand...

mmm .. I even found deliciously cheap strawberry today ! Gonna have them for desert vv
 
Curry is dead easy, i made kangaroo curry with potato, carrot and onion out in the bush with nothing more than a saucepan and a filleting knife over an open fire :D (try cooking rice and curry and keeping them warm with one saucepan and 2 plates :S)
 
I'm glad you've made such a quick recovery...24hrs is pretty good!
It looks like you've got all those practical advice you need.

The real hard part was probably putting it into action..way to go, sukiyaki.
Now watch out for those mood swings, and keep in touch with this thread..

If you ever feel danger again, hopefully not, talk!
I'm sure everybody's on the watch for you.

Try to keep things simple, so you don't burn out!
 
Frank D. White said:
Change your ways now or you will be doomed to a life of clutter! My cellar looks like the Smithsonian Museum crammed into one room. I can't throw anything away for fear it might be worth something someday.
Click to expand...

Truer words were never said. Don't become a "pack rat", one who saves everything for the sake of saving it. I used to feel the same way Frank does. I saved everything for fear that I might need it some day. It used to drive my wife crazy till one day I told her, "Just put it to the side. If I don't ask for it or look for it in a month or so just throw it away." It has worked and my clutter has been dwindled down.

However, I do keep a "memory box" of the things I accumulated during my stay in Japan. Small items like pocket diaries, movie stubs, a few train tickets, concert tickets and such. Start keeping ONLY the things you really want in a seperate box.

Also, at your age don't get bogged down in a love circle! You are young and Japanese women are plenty. Play the field and enjoy yourself while there. There will be more than enough women who will throw themselves at you without having to get bogged down in a serious relationship at 18.

I made the mistake of marrying a Japanese at 20, although at the time I didn't think it was a mistake, got divorced at 23, and thoroughly enjoyed myself for the next 11 years playing the field until I finally settled on one at age 34. Those 11 years were the best years of my life and I am still happily married today 17 years later. Enjoy them while you can. but always take 10 minutes out of your day to clean up and straighten out you place as the ladies will be quite impressed.

I envy you at your age in Japan and would give anything to be 18 in Japan again!
 
Pachipro said:
Also, at your age don't get bogged down in a love circle! You are young and Japanese women are plenty. Play the field and enjoy yourself while there. There will be more than enough women who will throw themselves at you without having to get bogged down in a serious relationship at 18.
Click to expand...
Sukiyaki is a SHE ;-) ehehe
 
If your life is a mess, just visit friends. Mess up there lives. Copy what they do to get out of the mess. Simple.


Mix the conbini foods with the laundry instead of limiting yourself to just clothes. This may have the result of destruction => unwearability => garbage => less stuff



I love my own clutter. I am one with my own clutter. My clutter is me, a part of me, growing ever larger as I am no longer growing spiritually, a stagnation spree, I am able to grow materially with stuff of no value.
I don't wish to be able to open the doors completely in my house. I diet of necessity.
 
Also, at your age don't get bogged down in a love circle! You are young and Japanese women are plenty. Play the field and enjoy yourself while there. There will be more than enough women who will throw themselves at you without having to get bogged down in a serious relationship at 18.
Click to expand...

heh heh .. I find this ammusing to happen 😊

Yes I'm a girl 😌


I love my own clutter. I am one with my own clutter. My clutter is me, a part of me, growing ever larger as I am no longer growing spiritually, a stagnation spree, I am able to grow materially with stuff of no value.
I don't wish to be able to open the doors completely in my house. I diet of necessity.
Click to expand...

Perhaps I too would have loved my own clutter if I had more doors. But I have only one door , if I am not able to open it then I'm trapped in my room for eternity ... :eek:
 
Get some Febreze (http://jp.pg.com/febreze/) to get the room smelling nice again. With you living in it you'd have no idea what it smells like, and if its anything like my room was, you'll need a crate of the stuff :D
 
Wow, they have Febreze in Japan. Cool. I use that stuff all the time. It really helps.
 

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