Spouse visa - confused... what should I do?

think_too_mut,
If you are a foreigner working/living here, you are an expat. Doesn't matter about "paid accommodation, school for children, air tickets home, defined duration of tenure, preserved job in where he came from. Company in Japan can not fire him or do anything to him or his job."

In my world there is a big difference.
In the wake of Lehman Brothers disaster and financial meltdown, many foreigners (real expats) were recalled home, on 4 weeks notice.
My daughter's school that has 600 students emptied out as 400 students disappeared after January 1 2009, did not turn up for the second semester. Their parents, otherwise lofty about their status and perks, were manipulated like pawns by their companies.
Nobody could do that to me and that is the biggest difference between my employment and that of the expats.
The autonomy and my life under my control. That's as far apart as it gets from what we call "expat".

Or, imagine a foreigner working in Haiti in whatever capacity. And then that terrible earthquake that killed over 200,000 people. NGOs and "expats" poured in, did whatever damage they could (some complained that their LandCruisers were delivered after 6 months wait, as they choked the non-existing infrastructure and supply lines for food and water, let alone LandCruiser dealerships). Those were the "expats". Two years later, without anything accomplished, they left to romance another tragedy and our foreigner remains, asking himself why those parasites had ever arrived and what for.

Think_too_mut
You should change your name to "Ramble_too_mut"
Your input here is irrelevant to my thread... so you can stop blowing your own trumpet, mkay?

humbug--as posted above, bringing any vehicle into japan is unrealistic. Yes, you'll have to sell those for less than you'd like when you do leave oz and move here, but the overall cost--lost time in dealing with with importing those here, money, and the process being something that will leave a very bad taste in your mouth about japan--is not worth it. Not even close, or even a maybe. Just not worth it.

I've been putting some serious thought into this... and to put it bluntly, I'm torn.

I have considered the idea of selling and I could possibly have a buyer... if I chose to sell, but I will lose quite a bit of money. Also considering I'll never build a car again... it will be hard for me to let go. But if its less than 7 grand to import it there, I would... as thats almost how much the gfs visa will cost in Aus. It will probably be over 8 grand.

But I think for me the biggest issue will be getting work. For whatever industry I chose, I will need to pass licencing test in Japanese. I don't even think I could even reach N2 level in a decade let alone ever... regardless of how much I study... so that would probably mean the only job I could do would be teaching English... And I really don't know if I can put up with that. I hate it that much.

Given those prospects, it looks bleak. Very bleak.

Isn't there some way one could convince them selves to like teaching? I surely mustn't be the only one who hates it that much... Or are those people just destined to give up?

So which do you like more, your woman or your car/bikes?

Thats the million $ question (median house prices in Sydney have surpassed that actually)

But I can't chose... I'm stuck in the middle. I can't imagine a life where I sacrifice my career and hobby for a girl and I can't imagine a life where I give up on that dream either.

I thought it would be easier on a spouse visa... It's less impossible... but still impossible :/

Well, good luck with it all. And I do truly mean that. I hope it all works out.

I teach, but I like it (uni level). And, tho I'm close to retirement, I'm healthy, and would easily consider continuing something similar to what I do now, post-retirement. It's not at all like something I want to get rid of, like I got some gum stuck on my shoe that I need to scrape off...!

I like it.

I offer this, since I guess we're different people, so take what I say cautiously, since we are coming at this from two very different points of view/attitudes.

Once upon a time, I heard some cliché to the effect that in one's life you need to both find a teacher, and be one.

Although it often comes in small doses, the feeling of actually helping someone, or, authentic contact, can be very gratifying. I do find that in teaching here (tho others may not).

Do you realize how narcissistic, self-centered, and immature you come across? Do you realize it sounds like you just want to use het to get a visa? That's what you're sounding like here.

What career are you in now? Do you have any professional qualifications or certifications?

Not all jobs in Japan require you to pass written tests. Some do. Some don't. There are jobs you can do. The only thing is that 99% of English speakers turn their noses up at them and consider themselves too good to work in Japanese working conditions and do Japanese hours for Japanese pay.

Contact Jav on the forums at Gaijinriders for realistic advice on the feasibility and costs of importing and registering your vehicles. He is in that line of work and well set-up to advise you on that.

Johny, Cheers for the advice. It's much appreciated.

Mike, it may sound like it but it is not at all like that. If a visa was all I was after, than I wouldn't be having this conversation. I may have selfish hobbies... but I don't think likes/dislikes is something I have control over. For me, its a big sacrifice.

It may sound like I am being a snob towards English teachers... but its not the case. I guess the root of the problem is rather personal... and not something I was expecting to talk about... To be honest it has been something I've tried to avoid all together. Though talking about our personal relationship is where I draw the line.

I didn't actually mind teaching others who want to learn. I do find fulfilment in that. Be it in language or when I used to teach Karate many moons ago... However I am afraid the only work I'd be destined for is baby sitting over energetic 5 year olds who are just dumped so the parents can have a break. I actually found that really stressful. I don't think I will get a better opportunity without a degree.

But ever since completing my Celta course... it pretty much broke me. The combined stress of public speaking combined with the stress of the Celta quite literally broke me... and guess I never recovered from that. When my language school closed down, as Japanese like to do, have everyone make speeches (in Japanese). Whilst speaking in Japanese wasn't a problem for me, the public speaking was. Despite me asking them to skip over me, they didn't listen... which resulted in an embarrassing escape.

It seems that if I can't overcome those "demons"... then I'm afraid it would just be setting myself up for failure again.

I used to work in engineering. I have been out of work for a little while, but I thought I already said this. I have an advanced diploma (2 years) in mechanical engineering.

Yes I noticed the diploma earlier. I had in mind certifications and the like from professional organizations rather than schools.

There's nothing wrong with having an aversion to pretending to teach English to people pretending to learn it. I feel the exact same way. In my case it was more that I hate busting my butt to explain something and the next time the same thing comes up the student acts like they've never even heard it before. I absolutely HATE it when I am supposed to care more about and put more effort into someone's English learning than they do themselves. P*sses me off no end and that is a character trait you can't have and teach eikaiwa without losing your mind. I did it a couple of years, got the hell out of it, and pray I never have to go back. I couldn't have stayed here if it meant having to remain in that racket for decades on end. Leave the English teaching for those who are suited for it. It works out better for everybody all around that way. If it makes you feel less lonesome, I don't have a degree either.

Apart from my Celta and cert 4 tesol, I only have engineering related stuff from my 10 years of experience.

I never had a problem with the repetition of teaching, or putting in more effort than the students, but I found the amount of prep work, being original, peppy/wacky in order to keep the class more interesting a bigger challenge for me. Its probably due to fear of being ridiculed and judged.

*Edit* even though I don't care what the little kids think, its more of what other peers, my friends and what I think of myself. I can't help internalise that... and for some reason I just feel shame and embarrassment. In reality, I am sure no one gives a flying f... but thats what social anxiety is like. Very hard for someone like that to get up in front of a large group of people.

You don't necessarily have to teach children if you don't want to. I didn't want to and I never did. Once had the following conversation with the manager:

"Mike, do you want to teach kids' classes?"
"Can I spank them?"
"What?! No!!"
"Then I'm not teaching them."

And that was the end of that.

If you actually spanked, and are not using this an illustration, or a way to get out of teaching kids, I pity your poor kids. Anyone who would ever hit a kid as a means of dealing with, or supposedly "teaching" something, has no sympathy/empathy from me.

They should not be a parent, and should not be a teacher.

johnny. I'm pretty sure he is joking...

Mike Cash said:

You don't necessarily have to teach children if you don't want to. I didn't want to and I never did. Once had the following conversation with the manager:

"Mike, do you want to teach kids' classes?"
"Can I spank them?"
"What?! No!!"
"Then I'm not teaching them."

And that was the end of that.

Click to expand...

And really, I am truly happy that that was the end of that.

Who would want you anywhere close to their kids?

johnnyG said:

And really, I am truly happy that that was the end of that.

Who would want you anywhere close to their kids?

Click to expand...

Not the neighbors in 102 across the parking lot.



Maybe if your knee jerks a little harder it will pull your foot out of your mouth.

Mike Cash said:

You don't necessarily have to teach children if you don't want to. I didn't want to and I never did. Once had the following conversation with the manager:

"Mike, do you want to teach kids' classes?"
"Can I spank them?"
"What?! No!!"
"Then I'm not teaching them."

And that was the end of that.

Click to expand...

QED

johnnyG said:

QED

Click to expand...

Have somebody read you the screenshot, and get your head out of your rear end.

Humbug said:

Think_too_mut
You should change your name to "Ramble_too_mut"
Your input here is irrelevant to my thread... so you can stop blowing your own trumpet, mkay?

Click to expand...

Rather than disengaging from this tread I am a bit surprised that "old hands" have not told you what , no if/but, but WILL happen. They might not own a car in Japan (same as me 2003-2008) and don't know what happens.
This is for you as well for others you may be entertaining the same ideas.

Parking:
For car ownership (and motorbike) you MUST have a parking spot to keep the vehicle on it. In the sticks, they may let you have a K-car (under 680cc) if you have a house but normally without a dedicated car spot, registration of a vehicle is impossible without car space.

(all pictures are mine, no copyright issues)
Tokyo Shinjuku:

Not a single car parked in the street.
Parking has to be paid, in Tokyo Shinjuku it's 800-1,000$ a month. For your car + motorbike probably 1,500$ a month (multiply by 12 and you get a yearly cost of just keeping the vehicles off the street, not even moving them jor insuring them).
Say, you won't live there. If you are in a village or some distant suburb, it may go for your both vehicles not less than 100$ a month. If you live in a place of similar convenience as, say, Hornsby in Sydney (Tokyo equivalent would be, say, Saitama or Chiba) then you are at ~500$ a month just for parking.
Insurance:
Then add, insurance (as a new arrival, you will be paying the highest price). For my 1st car (Toyota Vitz (known to you as Yaris) it was 1,400$ a year. The bike would be 600$ at least.
Insurance then is 2,000$ a year for both.
Registration (car tax)
Registration, would be another at least 1,500$ a year for both.
Technical inspection of vehicles older than 3 years
Yearly inspection of the cars would be another 1,200$, at least, for both.
The inspections are rigorous, especially for imported cars. If one bit is to be replaced, you may end up paying thousands of $ to replace the whole assembly. And where do you find the replacement parts of imported/custom built vehicles? You may end up being unable to register them (that does not liberate you from paying parking for them).
Where does it leave you at?
So, with the best of luck, just to own the vehicles you are at nearly at 6,000 a year, with no petrol,service, tyres, tollways.
If the vehicles were teleported to Japan at no cost, that is where you are. 6,000$ a year.
It can go up, depending on city council and cc the vehicles have. The previous calculation can easily go to 10,000$ a year altogether for a car with say 2,000cc and a bike with over 1,000cc.
My current cost of owning a car
It's brand new Toyota Prius Alpha, no technical inspection first 3 years.
I pay, a year:
40,000Y for registration (subsidised by the government as the car is a hybrid, for 1.8L petrol car would be double that)
200,000Y for insurance
240,000Y for parking
50,000Y for servicing, change of tyres (yes, the set of wheel with winter tyres was extra 120,000Y)
That's 530,000Y (~5,300A$) a year.
Then comes petrol, tollways. I guess, having the car cost me about 600$ a month.
In Aichi prefecture, having a car is convenient. Central place, so many attractions within a day trip (Kyoto is 2 hrs, Shirakawa-go 2 hrs, Ise Jingu 2 hrs, to name a few).
Travelled within first 2.5 years 50,000km in local. Took 1.2 million pictures from the places that my family has enjoyed.
What is your present situation?
Actually, your g/f's. Does she have a car? If she does, she would have to sell it to make parking available for your car. Or rent more parkings, for money.
My parting shot:
I know 3 guys here who had motorbikes. Had. The pre-condition for their marriage was - either bike or marriage. I used to swap notes with them about nice scenic drives around the Alps and hills, they knew the best. Youngish guys, low 30-ies. All 3 have sold their bikes.
One told me: "My wife does not want me to ride a bike. If I fix her with 2 kids and get killed in a bike crash, how would the kids grow up? Or, if I survive and remain crippled or disabled, I would be a mill stone around her neck, to look after me and support me."
The bike sold (it was Yamaha 1,200cc).
Hope this did not go as a spray of relevance against your dreams. Consider what I said, you may be at "love only" stage after that.

Edit: your Oz driving license will be recognized in Japan after you have been in the country for more than 6 months. No driving test or exam. Bring your passport to the office, they will closely examine all your ins and outs of Japan before giving you a 3 year Japanese blue license. No "P" plate needed but blue license means the highest possible cost at insurance of a vehicle.

Humbug, you wrote that you currently have N4, but "don't even think I could even reach N2 level in a decade let alone ever... regardless of how much I study".
That's a huge strike against anyone wishing to spend the rest of their life here.

Mike asked: So which do you like more, your woman or your car/bikes?
Your response: "But I can't chose... I'm stuck in the middle. I can't imagine a life where I sacrifice my career and hobby for a girl and I can't imagine a life where I give up on that dream either."
Strike 2. You are so blatantly selfish that I'm surprised you are even engaged (assuming that, anyway). Any marriage to her with these kinds of thoughts is doomed from the start. (Then again, you described your relationship only as follows: "I have been with my current girlfriend for over a year, and she has stayed with me in Australia twice just as a tourist....My girl and I are wanting to get married")

Then there's this: "I don't have much money at the moment."
So, you want to move to a new country, get married, set up a new life with no degree, buy a house, and not get rid of some semi-expensive toys. Very unrealistic. Let's call this a foul, not a strike just yet.

"Many years ago I completed a CELTA and TESOL and I had no problems finding work as an English teacher during my working holiday. However I only lasted 2 weeks. Unfortunately its a job I loathe...To put it bluntly, my personality does not fit the standard teaching style."
Ok, then for God's sake, don't go back to it. Your writing here is chock full of errors anyway, and I'd hate to know that we're in the same business. You'd make a mess of it. Teaching English is not all snot-nosed kiddies, but you have very little choice in the matter nowadays to choose who your students are. Competition for jobs is fierce, even the lowly eikaiwa ones. I've done eikaiwa, private lessons, private high school, and university work and been here more than half of your life, so I know of where I speak. Leave English teaching alone.
"I did try going to uni part time in 2008 while working full time to support myself. Unfortunately, it was an almost impossible exercise for me, financially, physically and mentally."
This speaks leagues against you ever trying to better yourself academically, which pretty much forces you to think of what you can do on a spouse visa with crappy Japanese skills. (yeah, yeah, I know you wrote, "NO japanese skill? I dont think this will be a big problem for me. I am pretty fluent when it comes to speaking/listening." But I'd really like to know how you can claim that with N4. Pretty unbelievable. Doesn't matter anyway because in most non-teaching jobs, you'll need to read/write in Japanese.)
Bottom line: stay away from Japan unless all you want to do is come here on a vacation and then get married. The certificate will be legal back in Oz, I presume, and then you two can return there and deal with life in a world where you don't have to deal with your inadequacies. The only problem / question is, how does your gf feel about that? Even if you were to manage to come to Japan and try working, what are her plans? I have noticed that you have barely mentioned her in all this. Foul ball 2. Clock is ticking.

I thought I was harsh on "humbag" member.

think too mut. kiss my arse.

you bring up fair points with tax, insurance... but I call bull **** on your price for tech inspections. For my bikes I guarantee I can get free tech inspections. They are all japanese manufacture, so I would imagine they will just be treated as old jap junkers. too expensive for a yuppie like you to fix up, but perfect for me.

Secondly, I wouldn't be paying for outdoor parking when I would get a house with a garage. I have no interest in living in a flat. Nor would I be stupid enough to live in shinjuku.

Plus I do all my own mechanical work. So I only pay for rego, insurance and consumables. Not much more expensive than what I pay now. 1.5k with compulsory insurance. I don't bother with full comp insurance. waste of money. i wouldn't use it to commute so I wouldn't rack up any toll fees. I avoid that crap here in Aus too. I'd also like to point out that my 250 doesn't require shaken. every other running cost is pretty much what I pay here... so it makes no difference. tax might be a bit higher, but woopdiedoo. If it gets too expensive for me, I just retire one of the bikes from road use and keep it specifically for track only.

Also, you car is lame. Then again, a prius suits you.

I really feel sorry for your friends though. I have already made it clear with my gf that I'd never get rid of the bikes. Car maybe but I would divorce a super model if she got between my and my bikes. how many times do you think people have told me riding is dangerous? you aren't the first and certainly not the last. FYI i joined gaijin riders back in 2009, not to mention I know tonnes of japanese/foreign riders, so to be honest, its not a topic I really need advice on.

One last note; I doubt you grew up right next to garden island. If you did though, it would explain the silver spoon hanging out your mouth.

Glen: Whilst normally, I would address all of your talking points... but quite frankly, you're an uptight cock head who doesn't deserve a response. Say it in person and you will get a different response

Absolutely he is full of bull on the prices, as he is practically every time he offers "facts" instead of opinions. Just by way of example, parking in Shinjuku for about 1/3 to 1/4 of the amount he mentioned

As to where he grew up, it would seem to have been Serbia.[/url]

Humbug, you need a minder assigned by social center to look after you. You can't walk around yourself.
I leave you with your advisers who have to google to see what parking is and who had to teach you that Home Office is not a Microsoft product. And don't forget an armour when fighting inspection prices and taxes.
It is you and the likes who were dragging home whatever they had collected along the way that made Oz government make spouse visa prices 7-8 thousand dollars. To reduce the possibility you bring a **** to the country that may be a social problem soon after arrival. What else would stick to you anyway?
Enjoy "inaka", you are not for better. Until Japan raise their visa prices to prevent their social rejects bringing into the country whatever they stumbled on.