Help on translating and using the right grammar points

RaineyPriest · 2 Feb 2016

Hello everyone, right now I am currently stuck on how to translate my sentence.
It's suppose to be,

"First, you play as a little girl called Sarah who woke up in the middle of a zombie apocalypse."

All I got from translating my sentence is まずは" and I don't know whether to us suru or yatte in this sentence.

mdchachi · 2 Feb 2016

Can you provide some context? Are you telling somebody about a game? Is the game itself giving some directions? etc.

Off the top of my head:
まずはゾンビアポカリプス中に起こされた少女のサラとして進む。

RaineyPriest · 2 Feb 2016

mdchachi said:
Can you provide some context? Are you telling somebody about a game? Is the game itself giving some directions? etc.

Off the top of my head:
まずはゾンビアポカリプス中に起こされた少女のサラとして進む。

I am talking about this game to someone, and I wanted to identify who Sarah was, so thats why I put in the sentence above. No, the game is not giving any directions. I'm talking about the game and how it moved me to tears lol Oh my god, I completely forgot about 中に lol thank you.

RaineyPriest · 2 Feb 2016

Unfortuantly now I'm stuck on another sentence and this I want to express how Sarah died.
When Sarah and her father is escaping Texas, this scene was the hardest to bear because Sarah was gunned down infront of her own father."

My attempt: セアラとセアラのお父さんへいっしょにテクサスをに蹴る時、このシーンは「こころいたみる？」ので、セアラは銃で撮影する... I know I have to use mae so should it be otousan no mae ni?

Toritoribe · 2 Feb 2016

Noishee said:
Hello everyone, right now I am currently stuck on how to translate my sentence.
It's suppose to be,

"First, you play as a little girl called Sarah who woke up in the middle of a zombie apocalypse."

All I got from translating my sentence is まずは" and I don't know whether to us suru or yatte in this sentence.

my attempt:
まず最初に/第一に、プレーヤーはゾンビ黙示録のさなかに目覚めたサラという少女としてゲームを進めます。

Does the player change the character from Sarah to someone else? If so, there is no problem with まずは. However, if you mean "the first explanation about the game" by "first", まずは doesn't work well.

起こされた is causative, so it means "someone woke her up", not "she woke up by herself".

Noishee said:
Unfortuantly now I'm stuck on another sentence and this I want to express how Sarah died.
When Sarah and her father is escaping Texas, this scene was the hardest to bear because Sarah was gunned down infront of her own father."

My attempt: セアラとセアラのお父さんへいっしょにテクサスをに蹴る時、このシーンは「こころいたみる？」ので、セアラは銃で撮影する... I know I have to use mae so should it be otousan no mae ni?

The most common Japanese transliteration of Sarah is サラ, as mdchachi-san wrote, not セアラ.
You need to recheck the meaning of the Japanese verbs/words you choose. 蹴る means "to kick (a ball, for instance)", and indeed 撮影する means "to shoot", but as the meaning "to take a picture/movie".
You can't use を and に for the same noun at the same time.

RaineyPriest · 2 Feb 2016

Toritoribe said:
my attempt:
まず最初に/第一に、プレーヤーはゾンビ黙示録のさなかに目覚めたサラという少女としてゲームを進めます。

Does the player change the character from Sarah to someone else? If so, there is no problem with まずは. However, if you mean "the first explanation about the game" by "first", まずは doesn't work well.

起こされた is causative, so it means "someone woke her up", not "she woke up by herself".

The most common Japanese transliteration of Sarah is サラ, as mdchachi-san wrote, not セアラ.
You need to recheck the meaning of the verbs/words you choose. 蹴る means "to kick (a ball)".
撮影する indeed means "to shoot", but as the meaning "to take a picture/movie".
You can't use を and に for the same noun at the same time.

It only changes to Jeol after Sarah dies, and Sarah did wake up by herself from a sound, is it still causeative sentence? Oh okay, I pronounced Sarah's name in the wrong context. I somehow wrote the wrong word in my sentence it's not suppose to be 蹴る, it's suppose to be 逃げる。 That's why there's a random ni there, thank you for the translation.

lanthas · 2 Feb 2016

Toritoribe said:
まず最初に/第一に、プレーヤーはゾンビ黙示録のさなかに目覚めたサラという少女としてゲームを進めます。

It seems 黙示録 refers specifically to the biblical apocalypse (which did not have any zombies as far as I know).

RaineyPriest · 2 Feb 2016

Noishee said:
It only changes to Jeol after Sarah dies, and Sarah did wake up by herself from a sound, is it still causeative sentence? Oh okay, I pronounced Sarah's name in the wrong context. I somehow wrote the wrong word in my sentence it's not suppose to be 蹴る, it's suppose to be 逃げる。 That's why there's a random ni there, thank you for the translation.

The right word for to shoot is うちます sorry, I don't know how I could mix those up lol

Toritoribe · 2 Feb 2016

lanthas said:
It seems 黙示録 refers specifically to the biblical apocalypse (which did not have any zombies as far as I know).

黙示録 can be used figuratively. (People in the Bible didn't play mahjong as far as I know.)

賭博黙示録カイジ - Wikipedia
学園黙示録 HIGHSCHOOL OF THE DEAD - Wikipedia
よいこの黙示録 - Wikipedia
太陽の黙示録 - Wikipedia

Noishee said:
It only changes to Jeol after Sarah dies

Then 最初 or まず(without は) is appropriate.

Noishee said:
Sarah did wake up by herself from a sound, is it still causeative sentence?

Sorry. I was wrong. 起こされた is passive, not causative.
I would use 目覚める also in that case.

Noishee said:
I somehow wrote the wrong word in my sentence it's not suppose to be 蹴る, it's suppose to be 逃げる。 That's why there's a random ni there, thank you for the translation.

Ah, I see, に蹴る（＝にける） vs. 逃げる（＝にげる）.

Is it "escaping to Texas" or "from Texas"? The particle differs depending on it.
撃つ is the correct verb, but "was gunned down" is passive.
"Hard to bear" is 耐えられない.
"A because B" is BのでA, not AのでB.

mdchachi · 3 Feb 2016

Noishee said:
こころいたみる？

Typically for something sad like this, I'd use the word 切ない.

Mike Cash · 3 Feb 2016

lanthas said:
It seems 黙示録 refers specifically to the biblical apocalypse (which did not have any zombies as far as I know).

Top 10 Zombie Scenes in the Bible

lanthas · 3 Feb 2016

Toritoribe said:
黙示録 can be used figuratively.

Then I was misled by both Goo and Jisho listing only (or at least mainly) the biblical Apocalypse in the definition of this word . Well, learned something new then.

Mike Cash said:
Top 10 Zombie Scenes in the Bible

I'm surprised they didn't include the resurrection of Jesus Christ himself.

RaineyPriest · 24 Feb 2016

Thank you everyone who helped me in this thread. I am sorry that I didn't go on for a while to thank everyone. I became swamped with schoolwork and now I have more translation problems.

My first problem is when I use とか、to explain that this game has zombies and interesting storyline. But the correct way to use it is や than など. I don't know when I need to use these grammar points because essentially it all means the same thing?

Toritoribe · 24 Feb 2016

とか and や are used to connect examples in the list, but とか can be also used at the end of the list. など is only for at the end. とか sounds more colloquial.
e.g.
ゾンビや幽霊や化け物などが出てくる。
ゾンビとか幽霊とか化け物とかが出てくる。

や, とか or など shows that the list is incomplete (there are more examples). If the list is exhaustive, と is used instead.
e.g.
ゾンビと幽霊と化け物が出てくる。

RaineyPriest · 24 Feb 2016

Toritoribe said:
とか and や are used to connect examples in the list, but とか can be also used at the end of the list. など is only for at the end. とか sounds more colloquial.
e.g.
ゾンビや幽霊や化け物などが出てくる。
ゾンビとか幽霊とか化け物とかが出てくる。

や, とか or など shows that the list is incomplete (there are more examples). If the list is exhaustive, と is used instead.
e.g.
ゾンビと幽霊と化け物が出てくる。

Oh okay, thank you for clearling things up.

I have another problem my friend said that I described this sentence wrong
ストーリーは本当にかんじようできな、ゲームすることが時は私の心がくつうです。
I wanted to say that, "the story is especially emotional when playing the game it's extremely painful." I used ことが because I changed the verb する to verb phrase and kutsuu because if I say 心がいったい it doesn't make sense when I want to express a game to be painfully evoking.

And for this sentence it's suppose to be, especially when you first start playing the game.
特にゲームをする始めますが。I learned from my japanese instructor that when I want to talk more about the game japanese us が but apparently it's wrong?

I'm sorry that it's so long.

RaineyPriest · 24 Feb 2016

Noishee said:
Oh okay, thank you for clearling things up.

I have another problem my friend said that I described this sentence wrong
ストーリーは本当にかんじようできな、特にゲームをし始めるは私の心がくつうです。

I'm sorry that it's so long.

If that works.

Toritoribe · 25 Feb 2016

Please do not use multiple accounts, Noishee/RaineyPriest-san.

XI. Multiple accounts and disposable email
We do not permit multiple accounts. If you want to change your user name please contact one of the administrators. In addition, we do not allow the use of disposable email accounts and will disable accounts of users employing them.

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Are you learning properly, using a textbook or taking a class?The difference between かんじよう and かんじょう is a very basic and crucial. I'm afraid to say this, but your translations such like かんじようできな, ゲームすることが時は or ゲームをする始めますが show that what you want to say is far advanced to you current level.

Help on translating and using the right grammar points

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