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Seeking Help People from Kurashiki - Okayama

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Neko 2489

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Hi , Im seeking for help ! My friend in Singapore just cut herself just for a heartless jp guy who lives in Okayama , Kurashiki !

The story goes this :

They both know each other since last year Oct , they both hit off very fast and they start to communicate almost everyday. And my friend she also save up her money just to travel all the way to Osaka to meet him in Kyoto. They both were happily spending time together. However, when shes back she felt insecure when hes not with her suddenly . He went for his company retreat just right after she reaches Singapore. They both continue to communicate but after he is back from his trip. He started to be a little drifting. His text and replies takes 6 to 12 hours later . Then she felt a little strange of his sudden actions. She ask if everything is ok with him because they arent talking much like usual . He start to jump at her saying she isnt understanding and told her he doesnt even have time for himself. he been busy with work. He requested for time and space. So she left him alone for days . She fall sick , low blood fainted at work . She texted him about her condition. He didnt really bother just tell her to take care and he went silence again. Later she tries to text him again but he didnt reply her. She felt hurt and cried for almost a week.

Then few days later he texted her finally . He treated like nothing happen . Talk as usual but still replies takes 12 hours . She kept quiet about it and try to be understanding. Then on the 7th day , she just talk about past relationship . And they both have 3 past relationships before. So she just say " so i am your 4th then " he read the text but didnt bother to reply. She wonder if she had said something wrong . Wanted to text him and apologies if she said the wrong thing. He replied her saying " You are a Friend , I think You do not understand. " A friend ? what is this all about ? The psat 6 months being together. The guy almost every week confess to her how much she meant to him. And said she is important to him. Then now A friend status ? She felt hurt and she break down. He continue to request for another time and space. She told him please stop it ! he keep saying she do not understand but she really do not understand what she do not understand. He keep shutting her off just like that.

Then 3 weeks later , She receive his text again . She wanted to move on because she felt tired of waiting for him. Both start to talk again but this time she is careful with her words and actions. No more hearts emojis and no more their nicknames. But their texts is 1 day 1 text. She tried hard and put alot of effort in this friendship. then again on the 7th day , She was busy at work and she know he like jet planes . She happen to see some planes photos and got excited to send him to cheer him up. She sent him but he read no reply . She was ok with it. Then late at night when she was sleeping .. all the sudden he text her saying this " Im sad ... I believed in you ... You see .. this is the last message ... Please stare at yourself ". She was confuse on what is going on ? She really do not know what happen ! She is lost she tried to call her thru Line he reject her calls, she try to text him no replies got blocked. She uses skype , he blocked her , Main line also got blocked. Instagarm also got block. He blocked her everything and everwhere. He left her without a reason ! She cried and seek for help ! The next day she lost of control .. She cut herself wanting to end her life . Because this pain is too unbearable. She really do not know what she did that causes him to be so cruel towards her. Even her friends tried to text him and tell him to unblock her and call her but he still refuse to that . Til now my friend still in hospital crying and not eatting . We all tried to help her but shes already lost her mind over this heartless Japanese guy !

Please someone help to locate him for her ! He meant to her alot she really want to know what is happening . Why is he so cruel towards her . My friend has Low blood and has early stage of Leukemia !


We could locate him but he is not replying us.
 
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mdchachi

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There is no point in bringing him back into this. What do you want him to say "I lost feelings for her and no longer care for her"? These are his feelings. It's not something that can be logically explained to her satisfaction. Sure he could blame her clinginess but bottom line is the relationship is over. There's nothing he can do to help your friend now. She needs to recognize her own self-worth and, with the help of good friends like you, get back on her own feet. If she recognized her own worth then she would understand this guy is not worth her love and let him go.
 

Neko 2489

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Hi ! My friend really had change alot for him. She isn't clingy to him. Now she isn't eating and refuse to stop crying. She really don't know what she had done. It is like being accused without a reason. They both were very close before that. That guy just suddenly so cruel to her and torture her this way. Does he really want to see her die Then he will feel good for himself? I always thought Japanese have a good heart but sad to say he is very mean to her.
I really hope to find a kind soul to help her to locate him. She really on her sick bed now. If this is what he really want to see her death because of him she end her life. Just to prove she done nothing wrong. Really proven 1 thing about their culture.



There is no point in bringing him back into this. What do you want him to say "I lost feelings for her and no longer care for her"? These are his feelings. It's not something that can be logically explained to her satisfaction. Sure he could blame her clinginess but bottom line is the relationship is over. There's nothing he can do to help your friend now. She needs to recognize her own self-worth and, with the help of good friends like you, get back on her own feet. If she recognized her own worth then she would understand this guy is not worth her love and let him go.
 

Mike Cash

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This proves nothing about Japanese culture.

Your friend needs mental help and you and the rest of her friends need a little perspective and a reality check.

She's so clingy and nuts that the guy cut it off with her and had to block all contact to stop her cyberstalking him. Then she tries to kill herself....so you and your friends decide it is his responsibility to ruin his life by getting together with her. Why? So she can continue pulling the same stunt on him over and over every time she's upset?

He wasn't married to her. He isn't responsible for continuing a relationship under any circumstances. He certainly isn't responsible for continuing one once he figured out she is nuts.

Meanwhile, your irrational solution to his protecting himself from her cyberstalking is to put his personal information on the internet and recruit total strangers to hunt him down and harass him until he takes her back. That's insane. And if you think we're going to hunt him down and harass him and risk the legal consequences of that for your mentally unstable friend, you're just as nuts as she is. Your enabling her isn't helping her.
 

Neko 2489

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As a friend of her I definitely want her to move on with her life. But seeing her this way torturing herself over that jerk! It's really unfair . I believe in her that she has stop being clingy to him and why she use all her communications app to locate him. It was because she want to contact him and find out what went wrong . It can't be out of the blue he do such a thing to her. She really did nothing to him. That day she was at work and she happen to see some photo of his favourite and send to him. She wasn't waiting to chat with him all day because she know he is at work too. Is it also a wrong that she did ? You people didn't see how suffering she was . She tried very hard to treasure him after their unknown broke off in april. She didn't even expect him to text her the usual way of texting too. And now she dump by him without a reason. We see her change for him many time. And believe she is serious on treating him as a friend. Right now she is in hospital with her deep cut and she also has that terminal illness. I'm just seeking help to locate him and tell him to stop hiding behind and be a man and tell her the truth . Even if it's gonna be a heart breaking one at least a closure right. Rather than my friend kill herself because of him. Will he ever live with a life without a gulit ?


This proves nothing about Japanese culture.

Your friend needs mental help and you and the rest of her friends need a little perspective and a reality check.

She's so clingy and nuts that the guy cut it off with her and had to block all contact to stop her cyberstalking him. Then she tries to kill herself....so you and your friends decide it is his responsibility to ruin his life by getting together with her. Why? So she can continue pulling the same stunt on him over and over every time she's upset?

He wasn't married to her. He isn't responsible for continuing a relationship under any circumstances. He certainly isn't responsible for continuing one once he figured out she is nuts.

Meanwhile, your irrational solution to his protecting himself from her cyberstalking is to put his personal information on the internet and recruit total strangers to hunt him down and harass him until he takes her back. That's insane. And if you think we're going to hunt him down and harass him and risk the legal consequences of that for your mentally unstable friend, you're just as nuts as she is. Your enabling her isn't helping her.
 

Mike Cash

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I believe in her that she has stop being clingy to him and why she use all her communications app to locate him.
Do you hear yourself?

Earlier you said she wasn't clingy.

Now you say she has stopped being clingy.....and then tell us that she has gone into Super Ultra Clingy Psycho B!tch Mode and is cyberstalking him.

You are joining her in cyberstalking and, even worse, recruiting people to stalk him in real life for you. You're worse than she is.

We don't care about your friend's obsession.

We're not going to risk police trouble and deportation for her.

There's no point in continuing this further. Please take your lunacy elsewhere.
 

Neko 2489

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Hi she's not a psycho ***** ! Mind your words. She's my friend ! She's harmed her life just because of this jerk that leave her with no reason. What wrong has she done to him ? She didn't insisted to talk to him daily. He was the one that came back to her and text her as a friend. So she did the same she chafed with him normally! Is this consider clingy. She didn't pester him every hour for a reply yet she let him do his stuff til he is free to reply. This jerk is very sensitive in words and she is careful with her words to him too.

Now my friend is lying there very weak yet people says she deserve it ? Come on what grave mistake she did ? She tried to call him that was because she really do not know what was going on. I also believe in her innocent .




Do you hear yourself?

Earlier you said she wasn't clingy.

Now you say she has stopped being clingy.....and then tell us that she has gone into Super Ultra Clingy Psycho B!tch Mode and is cyberstalking him.

You are joining her in cyberstalking and, even worse, recruiting people to stalk him in real life for you. You're worse than she is.

We don't care about your friend's obsession.

We're not going to risk police trouble and deportation for her.

There's no point in continuing this further. Please take your lunacy elsewhere.
 

mdchachi

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Even if your side of the story is correct contacting the guy is still the wrong thing to do.
You need to help your friend with her problems, not contribute to them. By blaming this guy for her situation you are supporting her narrative, that this is somehow his fault.
They had a short, intense relationship. He doesn't want to continue and he broke it off.
There is nothing to ask him. There is no purpose to asking why. He may very well be a jerk.
But your friend is harming herself over somebody she barely knows. That means the problem is within herself. Lack of self-worth or something. I hope she can get some psychological help and get past this.
Getting back in touch with the guy only supports her action. She self-harms and she gets the attention she wants. Then that encourages her to do it all over again.
 

Neko 2489

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Well maybe you are right. There isn't a point to ask him back since he hurt her this deep. This isn't the first time he did to her. He always did that but this time is even worst then the other 2 times. Can't you imagine when she fainted at work and was sent to hospital and was diagnosed with early stage lekumia. He totally didn't bother about her yet continue to torture her. She cried almost daily til she look very haggard. And that jerk still can happily enjoy his time buying new games to play. She tried hard to change for him to be a better person . She admitted she was too clingy in the past. She was willing to give up alot of things for him. Friends see her this way all got heart ache for her. She really this time never did wrong to him. Why no one really pity her yet says she a psycho? That's sad . We all are trying to locate him and tell him she is really sincere in this friendship. Who will be in the right mind to go ruin a friend ship that was meant to her so much. That's insane of it.




Even if your side of the story is correct contacting the guy is still the wrong thing to do.
You need to help your friend with her problems, not contribute to them. By blaming this guy for her situation you are supporting her narrative, that this is somehow his fault.
They had a short, intense relationship. He doesn't want to continue and he broke it off.
There is nothing to ask him. There is no purpose to asking why. He may very well be a jerk.
But your friend is harming herself over somebody she barely knows. That means the problem is within herself. Lack of self-worth or something. I hope she can get some psychological help and get past this.
Getting back in touch with the guy only supports her action. She self-harms and she gets the attention she wants. Then that encourages her to do it all over again.
 

Transformer5

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Just to echo what people above have said: your friend needs to get over this guy, pull herself together, face up to her health issues and get treatment and help for them, and move on.

The fact that his texts started taking 6-12 hours to reply is probably a sign that he's busy with work and other things. He hadn't forgotten about her, as he was still replying, but there was a slight bit of distance emerging between them (naturally, as they were in different countries). Your friend has then become very emotional about this fact, and read more into it than was actually the case. Her reaction has then caused him to (kindly, by the sound of it) ask for some space. That's understandable.

It can happen in the early stages of a relationship (and in the long-term too), where the two people's feelings for each other don't match. One person is more "into" it than the other, and the other person backs off as a result. This gets exacerbated when they're in different countries.

If she's got leukemia, that is a FAR more serious issue than some guy in another country who she'd only known for 6 months. She should be focusing on getting treatment for her illness, and forget about this guy. She needs the help and support of her family and true friends that know her well, not a guy she hardly knows, and who doesn't want to carry on any kind of relationship with her.
 

Neko 2489

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Is quite sad that that guy really doesnt bother about her. Not even a text and continues the block. I do agree that she need to carry on with her life without him. He's too far away though and hes lucky so that we cant hunt him down. She is still feeling upset and not eating her food. We are all worried about her health and scare she may do another silly thing.
I really hope to locate him and tell him off for making her this suffering. They were once very loving and he was once very forgiving and always worries about her. Now we see the other side of him . We singaporean also not like him at least we have a heart to give a call or text the other person to ensure shes ok. But not for this guy he just run away like that and i seriously hope he will leave with guilt. This misunderstanding really cause her life to be ruin. How can he ever sleep in peace. sigh .. i hope he have tons of nightmare every night. omg !

Just to echo what people above have said: your friend needs to get over this guy, pull herself together, face up to her health issues and get treatment and help for them, and move on.

The fact that his texts started taking 6-12 hours to reply is probably a sign that he's busy with work and other things. He hadn't forgotten about her, as he was still replying, but there was a slight bit of distance emerging between them (naturally, as they were in different countries). Your friend has then become very emotional about this fact, and read more into it than was actually the case. Her reaction has then caused him to (kindly, by the sound of it) ask for some space. That's understandable.

It can happen in the early stages of a relationship (and in the long-term too), where the two people's feelings for each other don't match. One person is more "into" it than the other, and the other person backs off as a result. This gets exacerbated when they're in different countries.

If she's got leukemia, that is a FAR more serious issue than some guy in another country who she'd only known for 6 months. She should be focusing on getting treatment for her illness, and forget about this guy. She needs the help and support of her family and true friends that know her well, not a guy she hardly knows, and who doesn't want to carry on any kind of relationship with her.
 

Mike Cash

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This has nothing to do with "All Things Japanese" in particular, or even anything at all to do with Japan in general and the OP has become a broken record.

Can we please close this pointless thread?
 

Transformer5

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Being bitter, angry, hateful and vindictive towards this guy will do NOTHING, and will only make you and your friend feel worse. She needs to be facing up to her health issues, and that requires positive help and support. Getting angry about this guy she hardly knows, and who lives in a far-off place, will only make her condition worse.

Get over it and move on.

(And yes, close the thread).
 

mdchachi

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I hate to close a thread. Somebody will undoubtedly jump back in here in 2 to 5 to 10 years to contribute and help out. 😁 I'll leave any thread closing to thomas.
 
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