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Golgo_13 said:WHY I FIRED MY SECRETARY
As I walked into my office, my secretary, Jane, said, "Good morning boss. Happy Birthday." And I felt a little better; someone had remembered.
I worked until noon. Then, Jane knocked on my door and said, "You know, it's such a beautiful day outside and it's your birthday let's go to lunch, just you and me." I said, "By George, that's the greatest thing I've heard all day. Let's go." We went to lunch.
We didn't go where we normally go; we went out to the country to a little private place. We had two martinis and enjoyed lunch tremendously.
On the way back to the office, she said, "You know, it's such a beautiful day. We don't need to go back to the office, do we?" I said, "No, I guess not." She
said, "Let's go to my apartment." After arriving at her apartment she said, "Boss, if you don't mind, I think I'll go into the bedroom and slip into something more comfortable." "Sure," I excitedly replied.
She went into the bedroom and, in about six minutes, she came out carrying a big birthday cake, followed by my wife, children, and dozens of our friends, all singing Happy Birthday.
And there I sat...on the couch..........naked.
Golgo_13 said:Okay, some of these may be rated-R :
Why should you never fall in love with a tennis player?
To them, "Love" means nothing.
What did John MacEnroe, the pro tennis player, say to his wife in bed?
"Bullschidt! That wasn't inside! What are you, blind?"
What's so fun about going to bed with an optometrist?
All night long he goes "Is this better or is that better? Is this better or is that about the same?"
What's so fun about going to bed with someone who works at an employment agency?
She gets undressed, gets into bed, and says "So tell me, what kind of position are you interested in?"
:sorry: :sorry: