Japanese Humor

[Yair Lahav]

I tried to see if there has been any prior thread on Japanese humor on the Forum but my search came up empty-handed. It is a topic that very much interests me and I wonder if the members have any Japanese jokes they could share here.

 

[thomas]

I have to ask Nahoko if she has any classic Japanese jokes at hand. There are two Usenet groups dedicated to Japanese humour:

[news]fj.jokes[/news] (Joke and humour from Japan)
[news]fj.jokes.d[/news] (Discussion about jokes from Japan)

 

[Yair Lahav]

Thanks for the Usenet addresses!

 

[deborah gormley]

Some excellent jokes there hehe



definitely worth the read lolol

 

[Yair Lahav]

Which one was your favorite?

 

[deborah gormley]

ahhh! yair it had to be "Johny and the little boy" I laughed for 10 mins


the other one I enjoyed was "your gonna die"

I'm just sorry I can't read the rest. Maybe someone will translate and e-mail them to me lolol.

 

[Yair Lahav]

I missed both. Where did you find them?

 

[deborah gormley]

@ yair, got them on the 1st site of thomas's fj.jokes (jokes and humour from japan), theres not many in english and thoses where my fav 2. It came up as outlook express,

 

[thomas]

"Imperial jokes"

Japan Today Japan News - Kuchikomi - Royal outraged by gassy fanfare - Japan's Leading International News Network

Japan's leading news network covering,politics,business,crime,sport,new products,technology,Internet,asia,environment and weather.

web.archive.org

 

[Yair Lahav]

Deb,

For some reason, my Outlook and Explorer (Mac editions) refuse to handle any newsgroups in Japanese and I haven't had the time to look into this misbehavior. I had to use Mozilla and for some reason I did not see the English postings. If you happened to save them, could you share it with us?

BTW, most of the Japanese postings there are personal bantering, humorous remarks and puns; not a lot of jokes per se...

 

[Yair Lahav]

Thomas,

Prince Takamado probably cries back the bad old times under the Tokugawa Shogunate. It is true that the Imperial household was practically under house arrest but at least they were not exposed to journalists, not mentioning other manifestations of today's relaxed attitudes...

 

[thomas]

...other manifestations of today's relaxed attitudes...

I love your choice of words, Yair.


I'm just happening to read Princess Chichibu's memoirs "The Silver Drum". Although she wasn't as restricted as other members of the imperial family, her book affords an interesting insight into the tenno's household. I'll post more about it.

 

[Yair Lahav]

I haven't read the memoirs you mentioned. I have to go to Kinokuniya today anyhow, and I'll see if they have it.

Something else:
Have you read the Tarepanda books? They are Japanese humor at its best; one cannot decide whether they are more charming or more hilarious.

Other:
Have anybody around likes rakugo? I was surprised to see how many good rakugo videos are available.

Sometimes I wish the price of the Japanese videos or CDs would be a bit less...

 

[thomas]

Originally posted by Yair Lahav
I haven't read the memoirs you mentioned. I have to go to Kinokuniya today anyhow, and I'll see if they have it.

Something else:
Have you read the Tarepanda books? They are Japanese humor at its best; one cannot decide whether they are more charming or more hilarious.

I just noticed that Kinokuniya maintains a store in your area. You are blessed having them in close vicinity.

I just knew these tarepanda stickers, I wasn't aware of their books. I have to admit they're really cute.

 

[deborah gormley]

@ Yair ;Little Johnny was walking down the road one day and an
old man was sitting on his front porch rocking back and
forth in his rocking chair.

The old man said, 'Whatcha got there, son?'

Johnny said, 'Got me some chicken wire.'

'Whatcha gonna do with that chicken wire, son?' asked
the old man.

'Gonna catch me some chickens,' said Johnny.

'You can't catch chickens with chicken wire,' said the
oldster.

Johnny just shrugged his shoulders and walked on down
the street.

About half an hour later, Johnny came back passing the
old man's front porch with three chickens entangled in
the chicken wire. The old man was shocked and couldn't
believe his eyes.

A little later Johnny passed the old man's porch. 'Whatcha
got now, son?'

'Got me some duct tape.'

'And whatcha gonna do with that duct tape?' the old
man asked.

'Gonna catch me some ducks.'

'You can't catch ducks with duct tape,' said the old
man. Johnny just shrugged his shoulders and kept on walking.


About half an hour later, back comes Johnny with three
ducks tangled in the duct tape. Again, the old man rubbed
his eyes in disbelief.

Half an hour later, Johnny was again passing the old
man's porch.

'Whatcha got now, son?' asked the old codger.

'Got me some pussy willow.'

The old man said, 'Wait right there while I get my shoes!'


Yair this is the one I found most amuseing and Thomas is going to kill me,lolol

 

[thomas]

 

[deborah gormley]

@ Yair, I'm trying to locate the other one and as yet no luck in finding it,lolol




@ Thomas, I really hope you didn't mind me posting the joke. I just wanted Yair to see it

 

[Yair Lahav]

Deb,

 

[Yair Lahav]

Thomas,

Sure I am truly blessed: Kinokuniya actually has two stores within a two hours' driving distance. The one in Edgewater, NJ, is smaller but it has a huge Japanese supermarket next door (plus a few really good restaurants). Their Manhattan store is very big and has an enormous selection. One of the very few advantages of living in this area...

On the other hand, you cannot get normal bread or pastry on the entire East Coast...

 

[moyashi]

translate this:

this morning, every morning

this time into Japanese::

Don't touch my moustache



sushi-bar jokes.

 

[moyashi]

ooops forgot.

Japanese gags.

take peanuts stick them in your nose and then blow them out at people.
stick chopsticks in your nose
take a slipper and whack everyone with it, especially on the forehead
take a cheap tin ashtray and hit yourself in the forhead with it
run around in new white briefs with an elephant drawn on front
make kanji with your body
make funny gestures and laugh hilariously

hmmm those seem to be the standard routines

 

[Yair Lahav]

>>take a cheap tin ashtray and hit yourself in the forhead with it <<

Well, it is pretty close to dancing around with a lamp shade on the head at our office parties. In regard to the other ways to gross out your audience, your guys over there and our fraternity guys over here could make a rather fruitful conference of idea exchange. Just don't count on my attendance...

 

[Yair Lahav]

translate this:

this morning, every morning

this time into Japanese::

Don't touch my moustache



A lot of possible translations are possible, but let's assume very direct, informal male speech, like at an izagaya:

"Kesa, maiasa, kondo boku no kuchihige wo suwaru na!"

It doesn't make a lot of sense (and much less humor). Neither does "suwaranaide kudasai" or similar polite forms. What is the actual wording your guys use?

 

[Yair Lahav]

Or is it "suwaru kurenai"?

 

[Yair Lahav]

"sawatte kurenai". (Could not edit out the misprint 'cause the program timed out on me).

BTW, is there any way to use normal JIS characters for Japanese text on the forum? I use a Mac G4 with Kotoeri input, but my IE Explorer is unwilling to take kana... It does display it from Japanese sites, but it does not accept my kana input. Writing in Romaji is a pain in the behind, because I always tend to make phonetic mistakes like this. Especially when words end in "renai"