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Internet Dating Services

Mikawa Ossan

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OK, so I've given it a lot of thought, and I've started to contemplate using an internet dating service to find a mate. I'm considering other alternatives as well, but for the time being, my question is:

Do you have any experience with internet dating services?

What do you think of them? Are they worth the bother?

And, do you have any advice for using them?
 

Davey

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I have never used an on-line-dating service, but I have some friends who had done it. With one it work perfect (player had 3 dates a week) and with the other one it doesn't(he didn't received any mail back).

I think especially for what you are searching, it's a good way, because you can select people on what they like, and what is matching.

advice: Don't lie about who you are, with that I mean put your own photo on it, don't say you got 3 million while you don't have it, etc. so yeah, be yourself, I wish you luck Mika!!!!🙂
 

Elizabeth

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I only know one person that has gone that route and that was through a local service accepting only area clientele which I would also have slightly more confidence in. Plus, they were able to meet up pretty much right away -- and ended up married a month later ! 😍

There are too many success stories to not believe in it at all, and it worked for her over techniques like speed dating and randomly stopping guys on the street. The crucial factor is realizing why past relationships failed and if an online service can correct any of those then by all means at least try.


http://million.staba.jp/ad-cm/zwei.shtml

今は、自分のデータをコンピュータに登録して結婚を前提にした付き合いを
希望している人を紹介してくれる会社があります。

That is all the information I have on this "online 見合い” company, Mikawa, when and if your situation ever gets to that point.

Best of luck !
 

Mikawa Ossan

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Thanks for your replies!

So I guess it's not some kind of scam, then?

Maybe I'll have to give it a try.

The site Elizabeth provided looked pretty interesting. I'll look into it more deeply in the near future.

I was also thinking about joining a local 窶吮?。ツ人 service. The only problem with that, is that I happen to know that if you do find your mate through that service, it's pretty expensive!

But then again, I would rather be poor and loved than rich and lonely.

Now I have the worst possible combination: poor and lonely! LOL :p
 

ArmandV

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I know a guy who signed up for one an all he got were porn spam messages.
 

Doc

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I don't trust those things, and find them utterly useless anyway. Still if you want to try one out nobody is stopping you from doing so.

Doc 🙂
 

Brooker

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I heard that's a pretty common way for couples to meet each other in Japan.
 

Mars Man

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Now Mikawa Ossan, my friend, I don't know one darn thang 'bout them ther 'dat'n services' but I am happy for you giving it a try !!! Yeah, I hope you catch that fish, man !! Just DO, oh PLEASE DO be as careful as a bee harvester with the way you go about doing it. . . a sting or two won't spoil the honey, but a bunch of them may cause you to feel only pain when you just see the honey.

I agree, fully, be totally truthful, and demand the same. When you finally get to meet someone, or date someone, get all the opinions and thoughts about it all. . . love, sex, kids, religion, money, mom & dad (yours and hers), lifestyle, hobbies, ...you name it, the whole shabang. At the same time, please do not expect perfection, you'll die still waiting for that perfect princess who feels the pea under all those mattresses.
BUT...I am crossing my fingers for you !! I am happy for you !! GOOD LUCK !
(and be careful boiling water....hee,hee.....)👍 :)
 

MajideSaiaku

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Abandon hope all ye who enter here.

I've never used an internet dating service, but, thats because mail/net/phone dating services and dating agencies in general dont exactly have a good rap sheet.
But, its worth a try if you feel you want to go down that road.

Its amazing where some folk meet their partners, mainly because its where they least expected it.
 

Carlson

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im telling you it works.. welll not the dating services but the exchange and pen pals... i used to meet several girls a weeks... and thats how i meet my gf im going out with now... 5 months so far.. lol.. now mostly i just talk with someone on msn and we will meet up for lunch and practice my japanese..
 

Mikawa Ossan

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In all honesty, I'm not looking for a pen pal or a friend. Or even a girlfriend, to be truthful. I want to settle down and start a family. Given my track record over the past 7 years, I'd say that I probably don't have much luck on my own.

Here's the problem, though. I have to save up money to join these services. The site Elizabeth posted a link to, for example, costs over $1000 US up front. The local service (that I know for a fact is not a hoax) costs about the same.

My younger brother's wedding last month, and my older brother's wedding in May are wiping me out for now. I wonder, is there a cheaper way?

I wouldn't mind paying such an amount to find a partner, but that up front part hurts.....
 

MajideSaiaku

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I met my girlfriend through www.japan-guide.com 's penpal service, and its free...funnily enough it even had a warning against using it for dating but, pffft cant stop love.

if your in japan and got some mates, try and go to a bar or night-spot that has plenty o ladies, or even ask your mates to set you up, cant be any worse then your track record if its as bad as you make it out to be...unless getting set up is part of that bad record.

Best of luck anyway dude, everyone deserves a good woman/man.
 

Tsuyoiko

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I don't know anyone who's used a dating service so I have no clue if they work.

Mikawa, if I wasn't married and living 6000 miles away I would go out with you 😊 I'm surprised you haven't met anyone in the chatroom. But then, I suppose most of the members here are outside Japan.

Anyway, good luck - you deserve it! 👍
 

Damicci

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Well Mikawa-san.
My main concern would be are you interested in dating? Because if you want to settle down your going to have to have a kind of a friend thing going. Which means the whole cat mouse game and getting to know each other. So having a Pen pal or Friend or GF is going to be your best way to start. Atleast you have that chance to determine if that is the person you want to settle down with. I do think paying large sum of money for assistance is a bit absurd. Especially when you don't know what your going to get or, who your going to meet for that matter. Try World friends I met my Penpal now GF on there. And there TONS of people from Japan on there.
 

Flashjeff

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This is just me, mind you, but I'm WAY too cynical to believe that online dating services actually work. I think they're a total bunk. The only couples that get together from that sort of business are the slimy con artists looking to make a quick buck and the naive dopes stupid enough to give them their money in the first place.
:eek:
 

Elizabeth

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I was also thinking about joining a local 窶吮?。ツ人 service. The only problem with that, is that I happen to know that if you do find your mate through that service, it's pretty expensive!
$1,000 dollars as a downpayment does seem a little excessive. Is there at least an intial consultation to determine their success rate and how your chances might fare ? Mika, it sounds like you might have some very specific criteria you're looking for in a partner which would make this a logical route, except as you say for the price tag....☝
 

Flashjeff

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A thousand bucks?? For a downpayment?? I'm sorry, but that's insane! I just couldn't see myself spending that kind of money for such a service!
😲
 

Mikawa Ossan

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Keep in mind that I'm talking about going through a Japanese company for this. Yes, in Japan, this is a common price for this service. It's just a matter of when you pay it.

I have to talk to the local service, but I think that you don't pay everything untill later. I know that wherever you go as a man, you have to pay a registration fee, and then a monthly fee. I'm sure there are other fees, etc.

The company which runs the hotel I worked for actually had the same service, but I never paid much attention to how it worked at the time.

BUT, when I originally made the thread, I actually had a different kind of web site in mind. I was thinking more along the lines of the dating website that sometimes makes it to the banner of Jref, as a matter of fact. I was thinking that it might not be so expensive, and therefore worthwhile.

Although at this point, I'll take any advice I can get! 👍
 

Elizabeth

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BUT, when I originally made the thread, I actually had a different kind of web site in mind. I was thinking more along the lines of the dating website that sometimes makes it to the banner of Jref, as a matter of fact. I was thinking that it might not be so expensive, and therefore worthwhile.
Although at this point, I'll take any advice I can get! 👍
Yeah, I'm not exactly sure how those sites work except I would imagine they are subscription based and probably very reasonable. The user would just submit a profile or other personal information and either get notified of good matches or wait for other searchers to contact them. Let us know what you find out ! :romance:
 

MeAndroo

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Mikawa Ossan said:
OK, so I've given it a lot of thought, and I've started to contemplate using an internet dating service to find a mate. I'm considering other alternatives as well, but for the time being, my question is:
Do you have any experience with internet dating services?
What do you think of them? Are they worth the bother?
And, do you have any advice for using them?

I've used a couple of different ones in the States, with varying success. Let me preface this by saying that I never paid a cent for any of them, which reduced my ability to communicate with girls on the site, but kept me from wasting money on sites that didn't have as many people as others. I've met a handful of people, been on a few second dates, and became friends with 2. Low percentage of success, but it's relatively low risk and very convenient.

There's still a stigma attached to meeting people from the internet, but it's becoming far more common. Some sites are pretty in depth regarding personality, spirituality, habits and sexual tendencies. Some match you up based on your preferences, but as far as the actual person, this can be misleading. You talk about starting a family, so obviously things like wanting children or where you want to live will matter more, but take their matching process with a grain of salt. Sometimes how often you drink is weighed as heavily as the desire to procreate :eek:

My only advice is to be honest. A lot of people misrepresent themselves, and that leads to problems if/when you meet up. Find a REAL picture of yourself, and get to know people before any rendezvous. And have fun! 🙂
 

m477

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Why do you need to enroll in a $1000 service? What's wrong with "normal" personals like on MSN, Yahoo, Match, etc?
 

sandoro

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why the internet?
i am sure you have tried all the options,
what do you normally do to look for mates anyway ?
 

Mikawa Ossan

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I have to keep this short this time....

Well, the reason for the internet is that I was hoping it would be cheaper than going through the local nakoudo company that I know.

"normal personals" is part of what I'm asking about. If you have any experience, let me know please!

Normally I meet people through work, classes I may take, and other friends I have. On rare occasions I meet people almost randomly at stores, etc.

See you later!
 

sandoro

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Mikawa Ossan said:
I have to keep this short this time....
Well, the reason for the internet is that I was hoping it would be cheaper than going through the local nakoudo company that I know.
"normal personals" is part of what I'm asking about. If you have any experience, let me know please!
Normally I meet people through work, classes I may take, and other friends I have. On rare occasions I meet people almost randomly at stores, etc.
See you later!


i have a lot of dating, through pen pals internet, and i have to tell you that i am meeting a lot of girls, i still have not find the right one, but still i make chances, the avarage of meeting in a week is about 4.
it depends what you write.
to me works anyway.
 

Uncle Frank

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I Think.....

the important thing is the girl has marriage and having children as her goal for meeting and dating. Avoid the superficial interest and go for the heavy hitters who are serious about settleing down.

Frank

 
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