What's new

Foreign policy explained to children

den4

先輩
15 Nov 2002
1,799
63
58
Well, I suppose this falls under humor....

amazing how one side always tries to simplify complex issues with heavy handed slants that annoys the other side, then the other side, in turn, comes up with its own version of simplifying complex issues to their own vantage points....I think they call that propaganda....something not quite covered in this explanation below.... :D

U.S. Foreign Policy..........Explaining it to Children
> >
> >Q: Daddy, why did we have to attack Iraq?
> >A: Because they had weapons of mass destruction honey.
> >
> >Q: But the inspectors didn't find any weapons of mass destruction.
> >A: That's because the Iraqis were hiding them.
> >
> >Q: And that's why we invaded Iraq?
> >A: Yep. Invasions always work better than inspections.
> >
> >Q: But after we invaded them, we STILL didn't find any weapons of mass
> >destruction, did we?
> >A: That's because the weapons are so well hidden. Don't worry, we'll find
> >something, probably right before the 2004 election.
> >
> >Q: Why did Iraq want all those weapons of mass destruction?
> >A: To use them in a war, silly.
> >
> >Q: I'm confused. If they had all those weapons that they planned to use
in
> >a war, then why didn't they use any of those weapons when we went to war
> with them?
> >A: Well, obviously they didn't want anyone to know they had those
weapons,
> >so they chose to die by the thousands rather than defend themselves.
> >
> >Q: That doesn't make sense Daddy. Why would they choose to die if they
had
> >all those big weapons to fight us back with?
> >A: It's a different culture. It's not supposed to make sense.
> >
> >Q: I don't know about you, but I don't think they had any of those
weapons
> >our government said they did.
> >A: Well, you know, it doesn't matter whether or not they had those
> weapons.
> >We had another good reason to invade them anyway.
> >
> >Q: And what was that?
> >A: Even if Iraq didn't have weapons of mass destruction, Saddam Hussein
> was
> >a cruel dictator, which is another good reason to invade another country.
> >
> >Q: Why? What does a cruel dictator do that makes it OK to invade his
> country?
> >A: Well, for one thing, he tortured his own people.
> >
> >Q: Kind of like what they do in China?
> >A: Don't go comparing China to Iraq. China is a good economic competitor,
> >where millions of people work for slave wages in sweatshops to make U.S.
> corporations
> >richer.
> >
> >Q: So if a country exploits its people for American corporate gain, it's
a
> >good country, even if that country tortures people?
> >A: Right.
> >
> >Q: Why were people in Iraq being tortured?
> >A: For political crimes, mostly, like criticizing the government.
> >
> >Q: Isn't that exactly what happens in China?
> >A: I told you, China is different.
> >
> >Q: What's the difference between China and Iraq?
> >A: Well, for one thing, Iraq was ruled by the Ba'ath party, while China
is
> >Communist.
> >
> >Q: Didn't you once tell me Communists were bad?
> >A: No, just Cuban Communists are bad.
> >
> >Q: How are the Cuban Communists bad?
> >A: Well, for one thing, people who criticize the government in Cuba are
> >sent to prison and tortured.
> >
> >Q: Like in Iraq?
> >A: Exactly.
> >
> >Q: And like in China, too?
> >A: I told you, China's a good economic competitor. Cuba, on the other
> hand,is not.
> >
> >Q: How come Cuba isn't a good economic competitor?
> >A: Well, you see, back in the early 1960s, our government passed some
laws
> >that made it illegal for Americans to trade or do any business with Cuba
> until they stopped being communists and started being capitalists like us.
> >
> >Q: But if we got rid of those laws, opened up trade with Cuba, and
started
> >doing business with them, wouldn't that help the Cubans become
> capitalists?
> >A: Don't be a smart-***.
> >
> >Q: I didn't think I was being one.
> >A: Well, anyway, they also don't have freedom of religion in Cuba.
> >
> >Q: Kind of like China and the Falun Gong movement?
> >A: I told you, stop saying bad things about China. Anyway, Saddam Hussein
> >came to power through a military
> >coup, so he's not really a legitimate leader anyway.
> >
> >Q: What's a military coup?
> >A: That's when a military general takes over the government of a country
> by
> >force, instead of holding free elections like we do in the United States.
> >
> >Q: Didn't the ruler of Pakistan come to power by a military coup?
> >A: You mean General Pervez Musharraf? Uh, yeah, he did, but Pakistan is
> our
> >friend.
> >
> >Q: Why is Pakistan our friend if their leader is illegitimate?
> >A: I never said Pervez Musharraf was illegitimate.
> >
> >Q: Didn't you just say a military general who comes to power by forcibly
> >overthrowing the legitimate government of a nation is an illegitimate
> leader?
> >A: Only Saddam Hussein. Pervez Musharraf is our friend, because he helped
> >us invade Afghanistan.
> >
> >Q: Why did we invade Afghanistan?
> >A: Because of what they did to us on September 11th.
> >
> >Q: What did Afghanistan do to us on September 11th?
> >A: Well, on September 11th, nineteen men, fifteen of them Saudi Arabians,
> >hijacked four airplanes and flew three of them into buildings, killing
> over 3,000 Americans.
> >
> >Q: So how did Afghanistan figure into all that?
> >A: Afghanistan was where those bad men trained, under the oppressive rule
> >of the Taliban.
> >
> >Q: Aren't the Taliban those bad radical Islamics who chopped off people's
> >heads and hands?
> >A: Yes, that's exactly who they were. Not only did they chop off people's
> >heads and hands, but they oppressed women, too.
> >
> >Q: Didn't the Bush administration give the Taliban 43 million dollars in
> >May of 2001?
> >A: Yes, but that money was a reward because they did such a good job
> fighting drugs.
> >
> >Q: Fighting drugs?
> >A: Yes, the Taliban were very helpful in stopping people from growing
> opium poppies.
> >
> >Q: How did they do such a good job?
> >A: Simple. If people were caught growing opium poppies, the Taliban would
> >have their hands and heads cut off.
> >
> >Q: So, when the Taliban cut off people's heads and hands for growing
> >flowers, that was OK, but not if they cut people's heads and hands off
for
> >other reasons?
> >A: Yes. It's OK with us if radical Islamic fundamentalists cut off
> people's
> >hands for growing flowers, but it's cruel if they cut off people's hands
> >for stealing bread.
> >
> >Q: Don't they also cut off people's hands and heads in Saudi Arabia?
> >A: That's different. Afghanistan was ruled by a tyrannical patriarchy
that
> >oppressed women and forced them to wear burqas whenever they were in
> public, with death by
> >stoning as the penalty for women who did not comply.
> >
> >Q: Don't Saudi women have to wear burqas in public, too?
> >A: No, Saudi women merely wear a traditional Islamic body covering.
> >
> >Q: What's the difference?
> >A: The traditional Islamic covering worn by Saudi women is a modest yet
> fashionable garment that covers all of a woman's body except for her eyes
> and fingers. The burqa, on
> >the other hand, is an evil tool of patriarchal oppression that covers all
> of a woman's body except for her eyes and fingers.
> >
> >Q: It sounds like the same thing with a different name.
> >A: Now, don't go comparing Afghanistan and Saudi Arabia. The Saudis are
> our friends.
> >
> >Q: But I thought you said 15 of the 19 hijackers on September 11th were
> from
> >Saudi Arabia.
> >A: Yes, but they trained in Afghanistan.
> >
> >Q: Who trained them?
> >A: A very bad man named Osama bin Laden.
> >
> >Q: Was he from Afghanistan?
> >A: Uh, no, he was from Saudi Arabia too. But he was a bad man, a very bad
> man.
> >
> >Q: I seem to recall he was our friend once.
> >A: Only when we helped him and the mujahadeen repel the Soviet invasion
of
> >Afghanistan in the 1980s.
> >
> >Q: Who are the Soviets? Was that the Evil Communist Empire Ronald Reagan
> >talked about?
> >A: There are no more Soviets. The Soviet Union broke up in 1990 or
> >thereabouts, and now they have elections and capitalism like us.We call
> hem Russians now.
> >
> >Q: So the Soviets ? I mean, the Russians ? are now our friends?
> >A: Well, not really. You see, they were our friends for many years after
> >they stopped being Soviets, but then they decided not to support our
> invasion of Iraq, so we're mad at them now.We're also mad at the French,
> Germans and Canadians because they didn't help us invade Iraq either.
> >
> >Q: So the French, Germans and Canadians are evil, too?
> >A: Not exactly evil, but just bad enough that we had to rename French
> fries
> >and French toast Freedom Fries and Freedom Toast.
> >
> >Q: Do we always rename foods whenever another country doesn't do what we
> >want them to do?
> >A: No, we just do that to our friends. Our enemies, we invade.
> >
> >Q: But wasn't Iraq one of our friends back in the 1980s?
> >A: Well, yeah. For a while.
> >
> >Q: Was Saddam Hussein ruler of Iraq back then?
> >A: Yes, but at the time he was fighting against Iran, which made him our
> friend, temporarily.
> >
> >Q: Why did that make him our friend?
> >A: Because at that time, Iran was our enemy.
> >
> >Q: Isn't that when he gassed the Kurds?
> >A: Yeah, but since he was fighting against Iran at the time, we looked
the
> >other way, to show him we were his friend.
> >
> >Q: So anyone who fights against one of our enemies automaticallybecomes
> our friend?
> >A: Most of the time, yes.
> >
> >Q: And anyone who fights against one of our friends is automatically an
> enemy?
> >A: Sometimes that's true, too. However, if American corporations can
> profit
> >by selling weapons to both sides at the same time, all the better.
> >
> >Q: Why?
> >A: Because war is good for the economy, which means war is good for
> America.
> >Also, since God is on America's side, anyone who opposes war is a godless
> un-American Communist. Do you understand now why we attacked Iraq?
> >
> >Q: I think so. We attacked them because God wanted us to, right?
> >A: Yes.
> >
> >Q: But how did we know God wanted us to attack Iraq?
> >A: Well, you see, God personally speaks to George W. Bush and tells him
> what to do.
> >
> >Q: So basically, what you're saying is that we attacked Iraq because
> George
> >W. Bush hears voices in his head?
> >A. Yes! You finally understand how the world works. Now close your eyes
> and go to sleep.
 
a friend sent it to me by email, but it seems to be making the rounds....so chances are you'll be seeing it in your neighborhood one of these moons.... :D
 
nah, you need to thank whomever it was that took the time to think up such things....sharing is the easy part.....thinking is hard.....
 
Originally posted by kirei_na_me
Especially when you know nothing! :D

Hey, it takes lots of work and insight to know nothing and be able to provide you with that type of info :D:p 👏 🙂
woowhoo! Yeah! I know nothing! And people are finally recognizing that fact! :p 👍 :)
 
Excellent ! :p: Another good way to show how religion is and has always been the adequate pretext for waging war and justify materialistic econimic reasons.
 
must be a popular thread with all these responses.... :D

either that or everybody is really bored... :eek:
 
Den4, are you implying we don't have a life?? :D :D

I think it just really struck a cord with all of us ... the cord of truth. There's a lot of like-minded people on this site. (One of the reasons I like it.) :)
 
Originally posted by Satori
Den4, are you implying we don't have a life?? :D :D

I think it just really struck a cord with all of us ... the cord of truth. There's a lot of like-minded people on this site. (One of the reasons I like it.) :)

I know nothing, so I have no way of knowing if you have a life or are currently living...unless you're one of the undead....but anyway, Cord of Truth, eh? Is that something like what Wonder Woman uses with that Golden Lasso of the Amazonians? :D And I hope it doesn't involve any S&M stuff with striking everybody with cords and all them whipping action.. :D

sorry....couldnt resist...
 
Back
Top Bottom