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Duty owed to a friend!


12 May 2003
Hope everyone's day is just perfect as usual.

Just while ago, someone was asking, what duties 2 friends owe to each other? or rather, if there is any duty at all that we owe to our good and reasonable friends? I pondered over it for sometime, and I just said "Yes", "I beieve we owe a couple of duties to our good and reasonable friends, as they do to us".

I responded to my friend by saying that, I think we should be like a mirror for our friends. "What do you mean by that", she asked?
I mean I want you to tell me if I am doing something wrong, and you should expect the same thing from me. I also, want you to encourage me if I am doing something good, and again, you should expect the same thing from me.

It looked like that she liked the Idea, but then I went on to say that, I believe a reasonable friend is not the one who always pleases you, but rather, a good and understanding friend, is the one who does not fear to remind you of your weak points, eventhough he/she is aware of your negative reaction to his/her reminders.

Finally, a good and reasonable friend is someone who is with you both in happy and sad times.

Just a thought to share!

Enjoy your weekends,

I suppose everyone has their own definition of what constitutes "friendship" per se. Some people find it hard to make new friends, others to maintain existing friendships over the course of time. I suspect there are no such universal criterion for "what makes a good friend" that can be easily quantified. I know for myself that friendships I thought would last forever soured rather quickly when things started going south... Others with whom I originally found myself constantly at odds with in the beginning have since turned out to be mates I hold in the highest regard.

People change (for the most part anyways), environments change, attitudes and opinions also... All these things and a myriad other variables can alter or sway the course of an innocent friendship over time to include the whole gamut of human emotion (everything from outright distrust and betrayal to romantic inclinations). Ultimately, I suspect one must be careful in choosing how and who they align themselves with and call "friend" so as not to get burnt in the long run. I know for myself those I number as my true friends are very few and far between (as well it should be).

Hi there,

Thanks for your very well thought response. I agree with you in general that the definition is wide, and open to different interpretations. But, I guess the essential question remains, as why do the people whom one considers a friend and pal at the beginning, change at the later stage of a friendship, contrary to what was intended at first place?
a friend

I call many people friends, but the lifetime ones are the ones I don't need to hear from, but know they are there if I need them.

Thank you for your comment.

I agree with you, that there are always some friends that you can count on. But, I believe that a true friendship comes when the friends are keeping in touch with one another, if not too frequently, but more oftenly.

If this communication is not kept in its ordinary way, I am afraid the spirit of friendship and closeness, would fade away in a long term.

I might be wrong, but I believe that I need to hear from my friends and they hear from me, not just because we are in need to help each other, but because we are all human beings and in need of a positive interractions.

We live in a world that more than any time before, we not only need to learn from one another, but also learn from the past mistakes committed by the others or even ourselves, no matter who did these mistakes, and on what grounds.

With the Advancement of technology this world village is getting smaller and smaller. The need for a better freindhsip and cooperation between various members of this world community is highly called for.

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